squiggs96 mirrors my personal situation perfectly. My wife and I have been blissfully married for almost eight years. We're also childfree by choice, and we've never once had a fight during the time we've been married (I'm sure that's not typical of most couples, though). She makes slightly more money than I do, and I don't at all feel ashamed or emasculated by that. In fact, it's only fair and proper that she be compensated accordingly because she has three university degrees (two bachelor's, one master's) whereas I only have one.
I also disagree strongly with some of the posters in this thread who claimed that marriage means loss of freedom and financial self-determination. That certainly hasn't been the case with us. We maintain a household budget and figure out which expenses should be considered "joint responsibility" (e.g. mortgage payments, utility bills, groceries, vacations, dinners out together, etc.). We each pay 50% of the cost of those. Any money we individually have left over after all joint household expenses are paid is ours to spend however we see fit. If I want to buy a new game console or build a new PC or buy a new guitar, BAM - done. I don't need to ask her permission to spend my money. Likewise, if she wants to spend her money on a new dress or an expensive pair of shoes or a day at the spa, she can go right ahead.
Purely looking at it from a financial perspective, we're both significantly better off than we would be if we were single. When you also add the fact that we're each other's best friend and love spending our time together, marriage has proven to have been a great decision for us.
I'm gonna be honest. My life without my lady is a scary scary place. Typically once a year herself and the kids will go back home for a fairly lengthy visit, usually about 2 weeks.
The first couple days is euphoric freedom. Playin poker at the casino, eating terribly, drinking regularly, masturbating somewhere other than the man cave, taking naps. It's great.
Usually by week 2 I look at myself in the mirror and I see 20 year old me and it scares the $&@! out of me. That guy was an unmotivated lost soul. Meeting my lady was the best thing that ever happened to me. It motivated me to excel in my career and be a good provider to her and my kids. Which to this point in my life is what I am most proud of.
I would be terrified to see what I would have become without her in my life.
I echo this post.
Prior to meeting my wife I was a University flunk out, well on my way to become an alcoholic, with no purpose of drive.
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Captain James P. DeCOSTE, CD, 18 Sep 1993
Marriage isn't for everyone and I understand that. I have seen some situations where it seems to be a marriage by convenience where they people probably should not have been married. Personally, being married now 10 years, it was the best thing that ever happened. Without a doubt I wouldn't want anyone else by my side as I go through life.
Marriage isn't for everyone and I understand that. I have seen some situations where it seems to be a marriage by convenience where they people probably should not have been married. Personally, being married now 10 years, it was the best thing that ever happened. Without a doubt I wouldn't want anyone else by my side as I go through life.
Bull####. You've been a member here for 10 years. You need us.
I can't remember if it goes up to 1 in 4 in people under 30 or people over 30, but yeah, you're basically playing Russian roulette with your junk if you get wasted and forget the condom.
It's supposedly very high among seniors. Or at least way higher than you'd care to think
My wife makes more than I do. In no way am I embarrassed by this. I make an excellent living, and if she can continue to earn more than I do, that is awesome. I hope she makes more than me for the rest of my life. We don't rely on each other for money. We don't use each other; we work together.
For years I made more than my wife but the past few she has made significantly more than me. This has changed our relationship....not a bit. We're just paying off the house faster.
The Following User Says Thank You to edslunch For This Useful Post:
For the first year of our marriage my wife made more then me; I noticed but did not care, neither did she. All the money went into one pot and we spent it however. For the past 4-years (stay 8months of unemployement) I've made considerably more and similarly she knows but does not care.
A big plus of being married: When I was laid off I did'nt have a lack of money to spend; our bank account still had a very heatlhy flow of cash and I never missed buying my things.
If I did not get married young, like I did, I probably would've been a drunk, druggy guy trying to be a professional but lacking the skills. My wife really kept me in line.
Another thing, I look at all my friends, who are still not married but in the same work envirnment as me, and notice that how much further the 2 of us have gone financially when compared to our single peers.
Marriage for me is the best thing ever. Waking up most mornings next to my BFF.
For years I made more than my wife but the past few she has made significantly more than me. This has changed our relationship....not a bit. We're just paying off the house faster.
Yeah we're on course for this. For 7 years I made notably more. About 6 months ago she was hired at a better company and now makes a smidge less than me, and within 3-5 years she will be earning a good 20-30k more than I will at that time.
Dunno, I laughed when he posted that. I accept that that fact may make me a horrible person.
Having been through a separation and divorce 5+ years ago I'm more along the lines of CK Louis line of thought.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bunk
Look at it like Louis CK does?
Obviously it sucks in the short term, but having the perspective of time and objectivity I would say the vast majority of people who have been through a divorce are happier and better off then if they stayed in a at best mediocre relationship. I know I am, and even the thought of what my life would be like if we tried to tough it out makes me facepalm.
Did Einstein not say something along the line of insanity was doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results? Although perhaps a little optimistic for those going through a separation/divorce currently, at least you have the chance to find someone now who's actually as into you as you are to them.
Dunno, I laughed when he posted that. I accept that that fact may make me a horrible person.
Wasn't so much the message as it was a tasteless place to post that with even worse timing IMO.
Comparably* that would be like someone posting "good thing i ****** hate cats and would never own one" when someone posts about euthanizing their cat in the pet thread.
