Best I can offer is a participation ribbon… and recommendations for therapists that provide more help than “read a book.”
Knowing society is in trouble and the need for therapists are two different things, I have a good fulfilled life but it doesn't mean I don't see what happening around the world nor should I put my head in the sand and ignore it.
I don't need a therapist to cope with the fact that the future doesn't look great for my kids and grandkids.
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I know so many people in this mindset right now. We need to step back and remember what brought us joy. We have so little control over global events, it can get extremely frustrating. I’m going to my families July birthdays party today, so the whole world can #### off for an evening. I mean it’s not the most helpful advice, but everyone needs to just step back and enjoy the small things now and then if they can.
The small things are all there is.
The future and past don't exist. Just what you see and experience right now in this moment.
When people suffer they're drifting off into one or the other and are no longer being here right now.
If its the past they're remembering something that they assigned more significant meaning to than it was actually worth, if it's the future they're perhaps fearing a potential event that's highly unlikely to happen in the precise worst case scenario that they see in their mind. And that can put them into survival mode in the present, which creates stress on the physiological self.
If you think about it, tomorrow when it gets here will just be another *now* moment. So that's why you want to be in the here and now and practice that. And the funny thing about presence is that it's nearly impossible to feel downtrodden or anxious while you're in it. Because the present moment is actually very easy for us to digest. It's when we start assigning future implications and start jumping to future conclusions that we invoke suffering on ourselves. It's impossible to be stressed by just taking in the present moment as an impartial spectator who is actively observing.
Stress from getting in your head also shortens your life, whereas meditation and practicing presence actually may be proving to lengthen it on a DNA level.
People need to get away from the TV news hour and immerse themselves in their own present life instead. The smaller you keep your scope, the more manageable things feel. And that's because they are. Why subject yourself to suggestions in the news of more things to worry about. How does being made aware of those things improve your life quality? It doesn't. It just gets you more into your head and out of the present. Ignorance, while looked down upon by some who value being in the know on as much as possible that is going on is really sometimes the best direction to take, especially if you care about your own mental state.
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Knowing society is in trouble and the need for therapists are two different things, I have a good fulfilled life but it doesn't mean I don't see what happening around the world nor should I put my head in the sand and ignore it.
I don't need a therapist to cope with the fact that the future doesn't look great for my kids and grandkids.
Happy to hear it. But for those who have some trouble coping or find themselves living with fear and anxiety about the state of the world, it can sure help.
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The "therapy paradox": would i still be depressed if i had the money & time for therapy? Theres nothing like telling poor, depressed people that all they need to do is invest a few thousand dollars they don't have into something that may not help them.
If you hopped in a time machine to 1983 or 1951, and brought today’s media tools and techniques with you, you would be appalled and dismayed by what you saw then, too. In fact, there were more wars, more people dying of disease, more poverty and brutality, than today. It’s the immediacy and intimacy of our media today that makes us more distressed, not any empirical increase in human misery. It may not feel like it, but this is the best time to be alive, and the great majority of people on the planet would be crazy to change places with their grandparents at the same age.
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Originally Posted by fotze
If this day gets you riled up, you obviously aren't numb to the disappointment yet to be a real fan.
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The "therapy paradox": would i still be depressed if i had the money & time for therapy? Theres nothing like telling poor, depressed people that all they need to do is invest a few thousand dollars they don't have into something that may not help them.
More money to play with doesn't cure underlying issues that you've carried with you knowingly or unknowingly. People are unhappy because they practice an unhappy frame of mind and when they reach their objectives there is a brief feeling of peace but they will usually still go back to what's familiar for them (discontentment).
What's good about having a therapist that you've hand picked for yourself because you feel comfortable with them (most people don't do this, they just go once and throw in the hat) is that you have someone to air your negative thoughts, worries and things you normally bottle from people to in a judgment-free setting. And getting those things out is something that a lot of people need.
The therapist doesn't cure you in a quick, one size fits all process. They help you to cure yourself over time through insights about your programming that is working against your present life that you were not previously aware of or downplayed the importance of. And obviously just having that outlet for your thoughts can bring people a lot of relief and perspective.
It is. The tendency to downplay and not savour the good is what robs people of joy that they could be experiencing more of the time.
Getting yourself a notebook and writing down things you're grateful for every morning is a simple routine that can change your life. Then you're doing something to train your brain to look for/filter out reasons to be happy.
The "therapy paradox": would i still be depressed if i had the money & time for therapy? Theres nothing like telling poor, depressed people that all they need to do is invest a few thousand dollars they don't have into something that may not help them.
Money and time diesnt equal happiness. The reason buddhism exists is because the buddha was a king who had everything given to him and lived the easy life, but he was still depressed. You can probably also just think of the premise of your statement to realize this as well - if time and money fixed depression, then the only people who could afford to do it wouldnt need it, which is empirically false
The "therapy paradox": would i still be depressed if i had the money & time for therapy? Theres nothing like telling poor, depressed people that all they need to do is invest a few thousand dollars they don't have into something that may not help them.
There are lots of options for free counselling. A lot of people have it built into their work benefits and don’t realize it. Most cities and towns have groups that meet on various topics to support each other and there is no cost.
I’d be happy to help someone locate some options if anyone PM’d me. It isn’t dismissive to suggest seeking support. And it certainly doesn’t have to cost thousands of dollars. It can be legitimately helpful to a lot of people.
Also, I don’t see anyone saying it’s “all you need to do”. It’s a suggestion if something that COULD help someone.
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The "therapy paradox": would i still be depressed if i had the money & time for therapy? Theres nothing like telling poor, depressed people that all they need to do is invest a few thousand dollars they don't have into something that may not help them.
Living in Canada, we actually have some good options for people with low/no income.
Personally, I’ve never spent a dollar of my own money on therapy and have still found meaningful help where and when I needed it.
I find it super interesting, though, how averse some people (almost always men) are to therapy and the kinds of excuses they give for refusing to even consider it. That’s probably a different conversation, though. But certainly connected to many of the problems we have in society.
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The “historically it’s the best time to be alive” is a bit like telling a suicidal person with depression that there are people worse off than them out there, so they should be happy they don’t have it worse.
Global starvation rates and standard of living don’t mean #### to people effected by droughts, tsunamis, war or whatever else.
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The “historically it’s the best time to be alive” is a bit like telling a suicidal person with depression that there are people worse off than them out there, so they should be happy they don’t have it worse.
Global starvation rates and standard of living don’t mean #### to people effected by droughts, tsunamis, war or whatever else.
Sure, but that seems a little apple to oranges to me. All these major issues people are mentioning in this thread, how many people here in this discussion have actually been threatened by the things mentioned in the OP?
We've always had assassinations
We've always had conspiracy theories
There's always been gun violence
There have always been wars
What makes the current ones so much worse? The fact that people just mainline content telling them all about how miserable they should be, usually trying to make it seem worse than it actually is just to get clicks or views
Sure, but that seems a little apple to oranges to me. All these major issues people are mentioning in this thread, how many people here in this discussion have actually been threatened by the things mentioned in the OP?
We've always had assassinations
We've always had conspiracy theories
There's always been gun violence
There have always been wars
What makes the current ones so much worse? The fact that people just mainline content telling them all about how miserable they should be, usually trying to make it seem worse than it actually is just to get clicks or views
Well, everyone on the planet is affected by climate change and it is, without question, the biggest threat to us all.
But that’s all irrelevant anyways, since my point stands regardless. Telling a person that someone else has it worse so they shouldn’t feel bad has and always will be a stupid move. I guess none of us should ever feel bad about anything ever because people are worse off.
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Sure, but that seems a little apple to oranges to me. All these major issues people are mentioning in this thread, how many people here in this discussion have actually been threatened by the things mentioned in the OP?
We've always had assassinations
We've always had conspiracy theories
There's always been gun violence
There have always been wars
What makes the current ones so much worse? The fact that people just mainline content telling them all about how miserable they should be, usually trying to make it seem worse than it actually is just to get clicks or views
Agreed. At a few times during the cold war we were much closer to nuclear destruction than anything we face now.
Climate change is something we will have to deal with and obviously the US potentially going off the rails is a problem but things will pass. There are signs we are close to peak inflation with fuel and shipping costs decreasing from their peaks.
But that’s all irrelevant anyways, since my point stands regardless. Telling a person that someone else has it worse so they shouldn’t feel bad has and always will be a stupid move. I guess none of us should ever feel bad about anything ever because people are worse off.
Yes, there are problems that exist. But I'm pointing out that sitting around going 'the world is terrible and just getting worse, let's sit around and talk about how screwed we are' isn't a healthy or productive way to fix those issues let alone your anxiety about them
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