Hey idiots, how are things? Lots of changes since I posted last so I felt that I would stop by and shed some truth on the CPHL.
I lost my mask so I have created a new one. Very stylish IMO.
So old man Cheese finally decided to hang up his whistle, tie up his skates and spend some quality time with himself and Viagra. Good job old man, you are too good for the CPHL. No need to waste your time talking to the likes of Whalen, Penney, Schum and Teeling. I hear that grant from Minnesota just took over as the new head guy. What’s he gonna do when he needs to fire someone? Probably get Mr. Cranky Pants Kevin Guy to do it.
Is the CPHL dying now that Cheese is gone? The forum has been dead lately and my sources tell me that the instant messenger that you use to chat is also half dead. Just because it is summer it doesn’t mean that the CPHL is dead. Old man Cheese probably is, maybe Axel and Becky, but not the CPHL.
So what else is new in this place? Some new Gm’s I see, Neil Sutaria and Steve you’re your lives to pathetic that you need to join this as well? Looks like you guys have a ton of work to do to get those terrible teams up to par. Cheese destroyed the Thrashers before he quit and those Devils have always been CRAP. We’ll see if you two goof balls can step up and do something.
But I suppose you’ll both do the exact same thing that every single new GM does. Rebuild right? I am so sick and tired of hearing all nooobies say they are going to rebuild. If you plan to do this, don’t waste your time and please stop believing that that is the best thing for your team. Anyone who says they are rebuilding are fooling themselves.
Any GM out there who is sending out dumb trade offers, stop it. Quit embarrassing yourselves by thinking you can outsmart another GM. You are just as dumb as they are. Don’t offer a 70OV player and a 9th round pick for an 80OV player. It is happening and it is not going over very well. If I was running this league I’d have half of you fired for doing this. Stop wasting your own and the other GM’s time.
Hey jam26 and sasketoon66, you are allowed to participate in the league and as of right now you are somehow still in it. I’d have you fired long ago if I was running this place. Step up and play, we all know you have nothing better to do. If you somehow found something better do, do everyone a favor and just quit. Enough wasting my time on you two, it’s not worth it.
Hey Becky, you better hurry up and trade Meszaros and Frolov to Dallas for Drake Berehowsky because you might have won a deal and the league jus can’t have that happening. Your team really stinks.
There is a complete lack of activity in Alberta; maybe those GM’s need to borrow Cheese’s Viagra to get a much needed boost.
Who the heck is this Eklunde bum anyways? What kind of a loser pretends to be some kind of fake hockey insider for the CPHL? Get a life! Also if you’re gonna keep doing those posts, at least put some effort into it. You write 5 sentences and you are finished. Give the GM’s of this league something substantial to read instead of telling them crap that they already know. You post a rumor that a trade might happen when it has already been posted under transactions. You suck.
Thanks to all of my fans who have e-mailed me. I will now do my best to answer your questions. I will use your names because you were dumb enough to send me e-mails using your own username.
Questions:
Nords: Mr. Jerk, why do you have to wear a mask? Are you afraid that people will find out who you are?
Jerk: No. I do not want people to see my face because they will realize just how beautiful I am.
Kevin Wu: Why do you always have to pick on me in your posts?
Jerk: Nerds always get picked on, don’t you know that by now?
pallykins: I am having trouble trimming my glorious bushy moustache lately. Any advice you can give me?
Jerk: Buy low, sell high.
Goffie: Who put that picture of a Grandma up on Becky’s roster page?
Jerk: I am not even going there!
Jam26: Do you think if I sit tight and do absolutely nothing with my team that I will be okay?
Jerk: You stink. I wish you’d just quit.
