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Old 09-06-2013, 04:49 AM   #101
Jets4Life
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I've never even thought about this before. If I go out on a bender and then drag myself to work the next morning, it's still possible I could get a DUI? Even 12 hours after my last drink? If so they should do 7AM Checkstops during the Stampede.
When I was in the problem, the closet I came to a DUI was 0.08 on the money. I was very lucky, since I had around 9 drinks in 5 hours.

Let's assume you drank for six hours one night, sobered up for three, then slept a good 8 hours, and headed to work an hour later. Assuming you were 200 pounds, you would have to consume 20 drinks in the six hour span (with 12 hours of not drinking), to be legally drunk in Alberta, according to this website.

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Old 09-06-2013, 07:48 AM   #102
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I've never even thought about this before. If I go out on a bender and then drag myself to work the next morning, it's still possible I could get a DUI? Even 12 hours after my last drink? If so they should do 7AM Checkstops during the Stampede.
They've actually done morning checkstops before. I think they laid quite a few charges.
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Old 09-06-2013, 08:11 AM   #103
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3 stories come to mind for me...

1st time was a client ski trip. I drank alot up to Louise, alot on the hill, alot after the hill, and then passed out on the bus. Was neck and neck with most of my clients. Then I got woken up to do tequila shots about an hour outside Calgary. Proceeded to get drunker than EVERYBODY on the bus, was an obnoxious fool, and hitchhiked a ride home from some random 50 year old lady I met on the bus, who's 18 year old daughter picked us up. The whole ride home, this lady is trying to pawn me off on her daughter, refusing to acknowledge I was telling her I was married. Needless to say, my wife was not amused when I got home, nor how I told her I got home. Took me 2 years to shake that reputation, and a hard lesson to learn. Never get drunker than your clients/boss.

2nd time was a work function. Client appreciation night. Drinking at a good pace with clients, coworkers and friends. End of the night came, had a solid buzz and was ready to go home. A client drags me to the bar, and in my half cut stupor, we proceed to do 5-6 shots each of tequila (sense a pattern? haha). Realizing that I've officially crossed a line and I have about 30 minutes before I black out, I grab my friend I was about to leave with, and we hop in the cab. I don't remember the ride home, I don't remember dropping my friend off at his house, and the next thing I remember is passing out on my porch because I forgot my key at work. My wife wasn't home, so there I am, drunk as hell in a full suit, passed out on my porch. My neighbor awkwardly propositions me, I say no, and my wife shows up I think about an hour later. I stumble into the garage and she screams bloody murder thinking I'm a murderous hobo. Proceed to strip naked in the garage, and declare that my wife bathe me. Not my finest moment. She took pictures of my passed out half naked in my laundry room to embarrass me in the future.

Last story is just a gong show. My stag in Vegas, woke up from our first night of debauchery where we got home at 8am in the morning. So we woke up at 1pm, went to the buffet still drunk, had all you can drink momosas with our food (I think I had about 10), went to the pool, drank beer til about 7 (I think I had 8-9 beer), went back to the hotel to nap til our dinner at 9. I woke up on the floor of my bathroom at 8:30, got ready, did 2 shots of tequila before going out, had a great dinner (one of the only things I remember clearly) with 3 vodka/redbull and half a bottle of red wine. Then went to the club and shared 2 40s of vodka with my 8 friends. At the club, I tried to yak in the bathroom (big nono if you ever do that), to no avail. Walked out of the stall to see 2 bouncers and the manager, "You! Come with us!". Pleading "It's my stag! I'm sorry!", I turned into Reggie Bush in the bathroom and dodged my way through all three of them and ran back to my friends in VIP. Moments later, they burst in and grab me by the collar and drag me out front. My buddy smooth talks them, and this is when I black out. From what I pieced together, we finished the vodka, I have a memory of being carried out by 2 buddies, a mild memory of a limo, and then the sidewalk. When I finally came to, I was getting a dual lapdance at the Rhino. Blacked out again after a couple more drinks, and apparently I disappeared for 4 hours, while my friends tried to find me, only to get distracted with their our entertainment. I remember my friend walking into VIP, I stood up, my pants hit the ground, and I got the hell out of dodge. I remember looking at my clock when I walked into the hotel room, and it was 10am... FML. I have never felt so horrible in my life after a night of drinking. I spent the whole day trying to sit or lie down wherever I could.
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Old 09-06-2013, 08:49 AM   #104
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I have not actually vomited, crapped, or pissed anywhere that made a mess. Dunno how people puke on others, or wake up in their own waste. Never done it. Seen it done. Done the retching for 3-4 hours, but always in a toliet, sink, or grassy area. Passed out plenty, but never woke up with a mess. Don't understand that. Had a friend that did it lots.

Actually have a lot of crazy drunk stories, but not necessarily about being TOO drunk. Too drunk for sure, but not, well like I said.
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Old 09-06-2013, 10:09 AM   #105
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It was christmas eve babe
In 1993
In Banos Ecuador: drank with the Irishmen
And then they sang a song
I missed the curfew
Slept on the sidewalk, and dreamed about you
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Old 09-06-2013, 04:54 PM   #106
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I have not actually vomited, crapped, or pissed anywhere that made a mess. Dunno how people puke on others, or wake up in their own waste. Never done it. Seen it done. Done the retching for 3-4 hours, but always in a toliet, sink, or grassy area. Passed out plenty, but never woke up with a mess. Don't understand that. Had a friend that did it lots.

Actually have a lot of crazy drunk stories, but not necessarily about being TOO drunk. Too drunk for sure, but not, well like I said.
Yup. I always seem to regain control just enough to make sure my vomit doesn't effect others. Unless "others" refers to a strangers sidewalk or lawn... That may have happened.
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Old 09-06-2013, 05:21 PM   #107
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I have not actually vomited, crapped, or pissed anywhere that made a mess. Dunno how people puke on others, or wake up in their own waste. Never done it. Seen it done. Done the retching for 3-4 hours, but always in a toliet, sink, or grassy area. Passed out plenty, but never woke up with a mess. Don't understand that. Had a friend that did it lots.

Actually have a lot of crazy drunk stories, but not necessarily about being TOO drunk. Too drunk for sure, but not, well like I said.
The closest I've gotten to this is puking on my friends floor and then passing out beside it . Of course I eventually woke up after my friend cleaned it up haha.

Other than that, I've never been so drunk that I can't control my bodily functions.
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Old 09-07-2013, 03:55 PM   #108
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I was in Thailand with my brother and our guesthouse had a small open air restaurant. We started the night there with our own bottle of vodka and mix provided by the waitress. Had a few drinks and headed out to the bars. After a long night we came back to the guesthouse with a date for my brother.
We shared a room so I offered to wait in the now closed restaurant and promptly fell asleep. I woke up confused around 12:30 to realize that every table was occupied with people eating lunch and I had already slept through breakfast. I awkwardly ran/walked back to my room and went back to sleep.
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Old 09-08-2013, 11:25 AM   #109
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I was in Thailand with my brother and our guesthouse had a small open air restaurant. We started the night there with our own bottle of vodka and mix provided by the waitress. Had a few drinks and headed out to the bars. After a long night we came back to the guesthouse with a date for my brother.
We shared a room so I offered to wait in the now closed restaurant and promptly fell asleep. I woke up confused around 12:30 to realize that every table was occupied with people eating lunch and I had already slept through breakfast. I awkwardly ran/walked back to my room and went back to sleep.

Came for the "I didn't know she was a Thai ladyboy" story left disappointed.
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Old 09-09-2013, 12:55 AM   #110
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I don't even know where to begin.
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Old 09-09-2013, 01:00 PM   #111
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Came for the "I didn't know she was a Thai ladyboy" story left disappointed.
Sorry to disappoint. It can be hard to spot the difference but there are subtle clues.
If the Thai person is hitting on you and not also trying to hustle drinks through Connect 4 dominance you may have met a lady boy.
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Old 09-09-2013, 01:35 PM   #112
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Last Saturday.
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Old 09-09-2013, 01:40 PM   #113
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I seem to be at my worst drunken behaviour for my wife's work Christmas parties. The last one I was invited to a couple years ago I botched a magician's table cloth pull of a fully set dinner table followed shortly after by a random gushing bleeding nose in the bathroom. Her boss walked in and thought I was doing coke (never done it in my life). I also vaguely remember singing Jingle Bell Rock with a group of secretaries - for some reason that's the one that embarrassed her most. Anyway, she now takes one of her friends to her Christmas parties and I stay home and play video games.
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Old 09-09-2013, 01:45 PM   #114
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I seem to be at my worst drunken behaviour for my wife's work Christmas parties. The last one I was invited to a couple years ago I botched a magician's table cloth pull of a fully set dinner table followed shortly after by a random gushing bleeding nose in the bathroom. Her boss walked in and thought I was doing coke (never done it in my life). I also vaguely remember singing Jingle Bell Rock with a group of secretaries - for some reason that's the one that embarrassed her most. Anyway, she now takes one of her friends to her Christmas parties and I stay home and play video games.
Hahahahahahahahaha.


Ahahahahahaha.

That's awesome.
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Old 09-09-2013, 01:55 PM   #115
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Sorry to disappoint. It can be hard to spot the difference but there are subtle clues.
If the Thai person is hitting on you and not also trying to hustle drinks through Connect 4 dominance you may have met a lady boy.
My rule of thumb is that, if she has breasts, she's not a ladyboy. I'm pretty sure it hasn't failed me yet, though I'll admit that I'm slightly suspicious about the girl whose d*** I sucked last week in Bangkok.
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Old 09-10-2013, 12:57 AM   #116
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I had a night where I stole a street sign, had to be restrained from continually stumbling onto a busy Southland Drive, poured a shot into a girl's pants (she liked it), pictures surfaced on facebook the day after on the dance floor with no shirt, extremely red drunk face, and random girls, none of which I remember, knocked a glass soap dispenser off my sink after getting home, causing one of the most difficult messes to clean up of all time, and followed by 24-hours of dry heaving this foul-smelling yellowish-green liquid.

Ah, the Stetson.
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