Here's a few simple things you can do to help yourself be more confident and be yourself in a good way.
1) Dress the way you think looks good, all the time.
It's not as important what you wear, it's important you feel that what you wear looks good on you. Those female friends and good salespeople can help you get started if you feel insecure. Just don't let them pick anything for you that you don't like. (Or maybe one or two things, you might get accustomed to them.)
The important thing is, wear good clothes all the time. This is a great confidence builder and it helps you improve your image. And be detailed. If you feel that belt of yours is too worn out and dumb, get a new one. Throw out socks that you wouldn't want anyone to see, even if they would propably never notice. The point is that every single item on you should be something that makes you go "that's fine". Even if it doesn't make you confident, it helps you relax, and that's a great starting point.
Remember, people don't only look at you in parties/clubs. People build their views on not just the moment they meet them but all the time. Especially if you have plenty of women who have "friend zoned" you, dressing nice all the time propably helps.
Also, don't worry too much about wearing stuff that "no-one wears". Women don't necessarily want men to dress "well" anyway. They are looking for personality and confidence, men who look like they can take care of themselves. If you think that weird shirt is cool, go ahead and wear it. Get a second opinion if you feel insecure, but other than that it's better to be a personality.
2) Be clean, neat and prepared, all the time.
Women care a lot about neat and clean, no matter their other preferences. Make sure your fingernails are presentable and don't have dirt under them. (To say this point blank: If you get laid, those things might go inside her. She will care what they look like.)
Also keep your place neat and clean all the time, and always have a well-stocked liquor cabinet and some snacks. And always, always have condoms on you.
Fortune favours those who are prepared. Also, when "being prepared" is your natural state of being, you stop paying attention to it yourself. You wear your nice clothes like it's nothing, you can invite people over because you can just do it at any time without thinking about it and so forth.
3) Stop looking for "cute" or "pretty", look for "attractive" or "interesting". There are different things that are appealing to people. If you look for "beauty", you get into the ad zone. Everybody tends to see the same people as beautiful because of the culture that surrounds us. But "interesting" and "attractive" are way more complicated. If you look for those qualities, you start noticing girls that others might not be interested in. This helps your cause.
Also, everyone likes a genuine compliment, and if you can say "I don't know, there was just something attractive/interesting about you" with total sincerity, you propably scored like a thousands points. (It's much easier to sound sincere if you are sincere.)
4) Acclimatize yourself.
The one big problem most people have is that they tend to go dumb when around attractive members of the opposite sex. They start thinking about impressing them and make fools of themselves. Also thinking about stuff like "that girl is attractive, should I make a move" is a great way of messing up your head.
Start looking around you all the time, looking for women/girls that attract you. Whether it'a grocery cashier, someone at cafe where you could sit on the same table or someone in a subway, if there's a chance to go next to her, do that. Don't be creepy though. There's (propably) no point in trying to make conversation or any way impress that person, or even to let her know you're there in any special way. Just interact with her the way you would with any other person in that situation, fully aware of the fact that you are there because she is (somewhat attractive). What you are doing is getting used to dealing with and being around attractive women. They don't even have to be hugely attractive, just pick the one that's more attractive than the others when ever possible.
Not only will you start taking attractive women as something that's naturally around you (because let's face it, world is filled with attractive women), you learn to look at them without staring. (Women like being looked at but hate being stared.) It will take a while, but after a few months you will be much more relaxed when talking to attractive women. At that point you can "just be you" which is the advice you always hear. (Be "the good you" though. If you don't try to present your good side, you won't look like you're interested.)
5) Stop looking at porn and masturbate less.
Masturbating is fun, but if you need porn to get off, then you don't really need to get off.
If you're looking to hook up with a real women, there are several ways in which porn can harm your ability to do so. (I'm not saying that it will, but because it can do so, and because nobody really needs porn, it's better to bet on the safe side and just get off porn for a while.)
First off, being horny boosts your adrenaline levels. This boosts your confidences and helps you take the risks needed to reach your goal of hooking up with someone. Being horny, you will naturally feel more more proactive. If you masturbate too much, you are less likely to take initiative, and our cultural demands initiative from men 99% of the time.
Second, too much porn can seriously mess up with your ability to feel affection and even attraction. There's quite hard scientific data on this. (Although to be fair, it's not just porn. Pretty much anything consumed in addiction-level amounts can do the same. So if you're a big game, consider taking a break from that too. But there's strong reason to believe porn is a bit of a special case.)
Mutual attraction and affection is very much a feedback-loop. If you are attracted to more people, more people will be attracted to you. Humans are essentially hardwired that way.
I have no idea where you're at with your porn levels, but again bet on the safe side. If there's even a small chance of porn affecting your ability of hooking up with women, let go of porn.
(Here's one article about the subject. It's more about the way it affects long-term relationships, but it's food for thought for everyone out there.
http://goodmenproject.com/health/how...your-marriage/ )
(Although if you feel like your balls will explode it's propably best to let a load off.)
