A-Hole Things You Do Just to be an A-Hole

[Voodooman]

Originally Posted by Byrns

I refuse to give my seat on the C-train to anyone (male or female) that isn't pregnant or obviously disabled.

I refuse to give my seat on the C-Train to anyone who is pregnant. And I start making comments under my breath about laying off the Cheetos.

I don't mess with disabled people though, that's not right. It wasn't their choice to be disabled, not like Preggers McGee "Oh look, I'm procreating! It's only been done for the last 5,000 years (or 2,000 if you're a Republican), but treat me like I'm the first person to walk on the moon"

[bradster57]

Originally Posted by Voodooman

I refuse to give my seat on the C-Train to anyone who is pregnant. And I start making comments under my breath about laying off the Cheetos.

I don't mess with disabled people though, that's not right. It wasn't their choice to be disabled, not like Preggers McGee "Oh look, I'm procreating! It's only been done for the last 5,000 years (or 2,000 if you're a Republican), but treat me like I'm the first person to walk on the moon"

And that's why I drive my pregnant wife to work everyday rather than putting up with that!

[Frank MetaMusil]

Originally Posted by freedogger

I undo the lids on salt and pepper shakers at restaurants.

Parmesan cheese/chilis/etc as well.

Also tobasco sauce.

[bizaro86]

Originally Posted by fotze

Exactly, you got her into this mess.

Maybe.

Would be an example of an A-hole comment

[Voodooman]

Originally Posted by bizaro86

Maybe.

Would be an example of an A-hole comment

I think the legal term is "allegedly"

[memphusk]

I farted in the skytram in Jasper. I also farted one of the loudest most horrible smelling monsters on the c train on my way to sait one morning. The car was so full, no other people could jam in. I couldn't help but smile.

[memphusk]

I also never stop for pedestrians.

[FanIn80]

Originally Posted by Muffins

Sometimes when i'm taking a bunch of paper to the recycling bin, i'll come across the girl in our office who is a bit of a recycling freak. If she is there, I will stare her down while throwing all the paper in the garbage beside the bin.

Yeah, I see what you mean. Not keeping some of that paper back so you could at least wipe her off is a bit of a dick move.

[bc-chris]

i wish is could claim this as one of mine...

two of my buddies were watching a sporting event - sitting on those steel bleachers. my one buddy cranked off the loudest, nastiest fart ever. now remember... they are sitting on steel bleachers. the entire row of people not only heard it - but felt the vibration. my buddy who ripped it stood up and yelled, 'gord you freakin' pig!!' my other buddy just sat their with with a dumb-founded look on his face! ha! ha!

[Bill Bumface]

Originally Posted by bc-chris

i wish is could claim this as one of mine...

two of my buddies were watching a sporting event - sitting on those steel bleachers. my one buddy cranked off the loudest, nastiest fart ever. now remember... they are sitting on steel bleachers. the entire row of people not only heard it - but felt the vibration. my buddy who ripped it stood up and yelled, 'gord you freakin' pig!!' my other buddy just sat their with with a dumb-founded look on his face! ha! ha!

I pull the same stunt with my gf in public all the time. I doubt anyone believes me it was her, but it's still fun watching her turn bright red.

[Old Yeller]

Originally Posted by tenyardrambo

dont pick up dog poop when my dog takes a dump

A neighbor of mine bagged the crap up and discreetly followed a dog owner home who did this and deposited the dog #### in his mailbox... without the bag.

He routinely "delivers the mail" to this guys house months after the fact.

[return to the red]

I have a buddy who used to whore it up pretty good, one of his fav moves was to bang a chick in the morning after he showered and then go clubbing at night and pick up a different chick and get a bj.

Personally I just like pounding back a case of corona so that my ass is smelling like an outhouse on a 30 degree day, drop ass next to my buddies at a bar and watch hilarity insue from the otherside.

[squiggs96]

Originally Posted by Cowperson

If I'm in the left hand (fast) lane on Deerfoot doing 120 kmh I'm not moving out of the way of someone who thinks we should be doing 130kmh.

I figure if I'm doing 20 kmh over the speed limit already inside the city and they need to go faster, they can go around me.

My reaction is entirely different and deferential if I'm on a regular highway.

Cowperson

Why is 20 km/hr over the limit acceptable, but 30 km/hr is not acceptable? Why not 10 or 40? The signs say to keep right unless passing.

When I bike to/from work and I'm in a bike lane, sometimes cars drive in them to avoid the lineups in the car lanes. I go to the front of these and refuse to go. The guy will honk and yell at me, but I tell him he's not allowed to be in the bike lane unless he is turning. Since he's not turning, he's not allowed to be there. More yelling will continue. I'll ask him why he doesn't just drive on the sidewalk since he doesn't feel like following the rules of the road. More yelling will ensue. I'll usually say I have nowhere to be for the next 15 hours, and can stay there all day if I need to. By this time more cars have followed this guy in the bike lane and now there are multiple cars honking and yelling. The car lane is now moving and if they had just stayed in their proper lane, they'd have been through the intersection. They say they'll drive over me, but I'm not too worried about it.

[freedogger]

About a year ago, my brother's hot girl friend dumped him. I was over at his house and installed porn filter's on his machine.

[dissentowner]

Originally Posted by freedogger

About a year ago, my brother's hot girl friend dumped him. I was over at his house and installed porn filter's on his machine.

Did you bang her after they split for double points?

[burn_this_city]

I hulkroganed a woman on Anderson road the same way he did, it's worth attempting if you drive something big and old.

[#22]

Originally Posted by hulkrogan

One day I was in the left lane, headed straight through. I know the left turn light is now yellow, but I see a guy coming the opposite direction in the left turn lane, not slowing down. I decided screw it, so as soon as my light turns green, I gun it to the middle of the intersection, then slam on my brakes. The red light runner has to slam on his brakes to not t-bone me, which he does. He starts honking and going into an absolute meltdown of rage. I just point up to my green light for a couple seconds, just long enough for traffic in the right lane to start flowing, and then continue along my way, this DB stuck in the intersection with a car stopped at the red light he blew, and a stream of cars going 90km/h in front of him. He was just absolutely losing it, I laughed all the way to my parent's house.

This is one of my favorite games. Whenever I'm at the front of the cue, I'm watching for the green, and as soon as it turns I'm going right at whomever decides to run the turning light. Obviously I won't actually hit them, but I will make it close, close enough that I can see the whites in their eyes as they scamper hurriedly across, looking over pale faced in fear at me, believing they are going to get T-boned. The best is when the GF / wife is in the passenger seat. I continue on my merry way laughing out loud imaging the bitching going on in that car as she lays into him for running the light and putting her in mortal danger

[albertGQ]

^^^
I love doing that too. But I throw in a middle finger and mouth the words "WTF?!?!?" as well.

[memphusk]

When I ride elevators while im drunk, I push the buttons for every floor, as long as there are strangers in the elevator.

[Ben_in_Canada]

Was skimming the funny & cool thread with my little girl on her mothers computer, and saw this pic.


The little one laughed her ass off so I made it the wallpaper for her mums computer. (she will be pissed about it)