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Old 11-08-2010, 02:40 PM   #161
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Just me, but I never delete the phone number, for no other reason than I want to see the name pop up on my caller ID if she ever calls again, otherwise its just a bunch of numbers that could be anyone and you risk being caught unaware.
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Old 11-08-2010, 02:41 PM   #162
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^ Just change her ID to DO NOT ANSWER.
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Old 11-08-2010, 02:44 PM   #163
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I'm from the old school, where society took a dim view of couples living together in a commonlaw relationship. I remember telling my kids if they did that, invariably one of the parties would end up getting hurt...and sure enough it happened. I think the main reason is that there isn't the depth of commitment that there is when couples get married.

I'm sorry to hear about your breakup Peter. She obviously wasn't the one for you, and when the right one comes along, you both won't hesitate to tie the knot.

I'm also with Cowperson, in that the experience shouldn't make you become bitter. I've seen that happen to friends, and it seems like a complete waste if time and energy, and accomplishes nothing but misery.

Please take care of yourself, and realize that time cures all things.
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Old 11-08-2010, 02:49 PM   #164
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I'm from the old school, where society took a dim view of couples living together in a commonlaw relationship. I remember telling my kids if they did that, invariably one of the parties would end up getting hurt...and sure enough it happened. I think the main reason is that there isn't the depth of commitment that there is when couples get married.

I'm sorry to hear about your breakup Peter. She obviously wasn't the one for you, and when the right one comes along, you both won't hesitate to tie the knot.

I'm also with Cowperson, in that the experience shouldn't make you become bitter. I've seen that happen to friends, and it seems like a complete waste if time and energy, and accomplishes nothing but misery.

Please take care of yourself, and realize that time cures all things.
I don't know, I prefer to take the couch for a test drive before I buy it.
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Old 11-08-2010, 02:51 PM   #165
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I'm from the old school, where society took a dim view of couples living together in a commonlaw relationship.
I'm from the new school that thinks it's crazy to marry someone before living with them for a couple of years.
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Old 11-08-2010, 02:57 PM   #166
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That's exactly how I feel too. And I didn't even get to date her. She just used the possibility of us dating to string me along for 2 1/2 years. And the ironic thing is I'm pretty sure the ex of the dweeb she's with now was trying to get my attention one night. But I was so strung up on her that I ignored her.
this makes me sad. You honestly wasted 2 1/2 years of your life waiting on the possibility you might get with a girl? this is unbelievable. I could wait maybe 2 1/2 weeks and then accept reality.
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Old 11-08-2010, 03:02 PM   #167
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That's exactly how I feel too. And I didn't even get to date her. She just used the possibility of us dating to string me along for 2 1/2 years. And the ironic thing is I'm pretty sure the ex of the dweeb she's with now was trying to get my attention one night. But I was so strung up on her that I ignored her.
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Old 11-08-2010, 04:42 PM   #168
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I'm from the old school, where society took a dim view of couples living together in a commonlaw relationship. I remember telling my kids if they did that, invariably one of the parties would end up getting hurt...and sure enough it happened. I think the main reason is that there isn't the depth of commitment that there is when couples get married.
That is honestly one of the most ignorant and uninformed things I've read on this forum.
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Old 11-08-2010, 04:48 PM   #169
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I'm from the old school, where society took a dim view of couples living together in a commonlaw relationship. I remember telling my kids if they did that, invariably one of the parties would end up getting hurt...and sure enough it happened. I think the main reason is that there isn't the depth of commitment that there is when couples get married.
Did you also tell them that girl wear pink, boys wear blue, and women grow up to work in the kitchen so men can go to the office and come home to a perfecly clean house, hot cooked meal, and perfectly behaved children?
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Old 11-08-2010, 04:52 PM   #170
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I'm from the old school, where society took a dim view of couples living together in a commonlaw relationship. I remember telling my kids if they did that, invariably one of the parties would end up getting hurt...and sure enough it happened. I think the main reason is that there isn't the depth of commitment that there is when couples get married.

I'm sorry to hear about your breakup Peter. She obviously wasn't the one for you, and when the right one comes along, you both won't hesitate to tie the knot.

I'm also with Cowperson, in that the experience shouldn't make you become bitter. I've seen that happen to friends, and it seems like a complete waste if time and energy, and accomplishes nothing but misery.

Please take care of yourself, and realize that time cures all things.

You know marriages break up too right? Or do you listen to PB16 and frown upon divorce?
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Old 11-08-2010, 05:09 PM   #171
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You know marriages break up too right? Or do listen to PB16 and frown upon divorce?
That's stupid. Everyone knows that once you sign a piece of paper God magically removes all of the issues and conflicts from your relationship. That's why you never see unhappy married people.
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Old 11-08-2010, 05:37 PM   #172
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peter12, I'm in the same boat as you now too, my friend. My girl broke it off with me yesterday.

I'd be sad, since she was a very attractive girl with a fantastic personality, but.....

....WOOOO! Freedom! Now I can watch Flames games all the time with no reprecussions! And, I can now hit on chicks again! God I love my 20's!!!!!!!
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Old 11-08-2010, 05:50 PM   #173
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I'm from the new school that thinks it's crazy to marry someone before living with them for a couple of years.
When you have a fight with your partner it's so easy for one or the other to pack up their things and leave. I've had friends go through this and tell me living common law doesn't really prove wether a partner is commited to work things out when things aren't going well in the relationship.
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Old 11-08-2010, 05:51 PM   #174
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When you have a fight with your partner it's so easy for one or the other to pack up their things and leave.
And this isn't possible in marriage because?
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Old 11-08-2010, 05:53 PM   #175
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And this isn't possible in marriage because?
Because Dion is from the 'old school'.
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Old 11-08-2010, 05:54 PM   #176
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When you have a fight with your partner it's so easy for one or the other to pack up their things and leave. I've had friends go through this and tell me living common law doesn't really prove wether a partner is commited to work things out when things aren't going well in the relationship.

Well with the divorce rate at or above 50%, I don't see how people are proving their commitment by spending $20,000 on a party and signing a document. I mean, I understand why people want to get married, I just disagree that living common law is somehow more prone to breaking up.

The idea of not living with someone before marrying them just seems crazy to me. Really crazy.
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Old 11-08-2010, 05:54 PM   #177
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That's stupid. Everyone knows that once you sign a piece of paper God magically removes all of the issues and conflicts from your relationship. That's why you never see unhappy married people.
The hassle and costs of going through a divorce make it much more difficult as opposed to living common law. My sister went through a nasty divorce years ago only after trying to make the marriage work, even though her hubby had cheated on her. It ended up costing her alot in lawyer fees.
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Old 11-08-2010, 05:56 PM   #178
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The hassle and costs of going through a divorce make it much more difficult as opposed to living common law. My sister went through a nasty divorce years ago only after trying to make the marriage work, even though her hubby had cheated on her. It ended up costing her alot in lawyer fees.
So if you're trying to make a case for marriage it isn't working. You are saying here that because you're married you are financially trapped or forced to stay miserable.
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Old 11-08-2010, 05:57 PM   #179
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From my understanding breaking up a common law relationship can be just as if not more difficult than a formal divorce. I thought I read that here one time, I could be wrong however.
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Old 11-08-2010, 05:58 PM   #180
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Well with the divorce rate at or above 50%, I don't see how people are proving their commitment by spending $20,000 on a party and signing a document. I mean, I understand why people want to get married, I just disagree that living common law is somehow more prone to breaking up.

The idea of not living with someone before marrying them just seems crazy to me. Really crazy.
The divorce rate as it is tells me people are not taking marriage seriously enough. A good friend has been divorced 2 times already.
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