I hate myself

[V1nnyTh3Flam35Fan]

Someone please help me

[TorqueDog]

https://ab.211.ca/how-we-help/helplines/

Calgary Main Crisis Line: (403) 266-HELP (4357)

[DoubleF]

https://distresscentre.com

[CroFlames]

The night is darkest just before the dawn.

Call the crisis line for help they are pros at this stuff or let it out here. This is a community that is always ready to listen.

[fotze2]

Originally Posted by V1nnyTh3Flam35Fan

Someone please help me

I'll meet you right now. PM me.

[TrentCrimmIndependent]

Want to type out some of what you're going through?

My door is open if you want someone to PM who you can remain anonymous with. I'm down to lend a ear and provide moral support.

[Locke]

Dont do anything crazy.

No Permanent solutions to temporary problems. Go meet fotze or call for help.

[KelVarnsen]

Text or call 988

[D as in David]

Originally Posted by V1nnyTh3Flam35Fan

Someone please help me

You're never alone. Many of us have been there before and are willing to listen. Reach out.

[Mr.Coffee]

Originally Posted by fotze2

I'll meet you right now. PM me.

You’re a good man

[Reggie Dunlop]

People care.

[afc wimbledon]

There's nothing in life you can't fix or overcome, there is nothing that you have ####ed up you can't with effort un####, what ever you are going through be it great or awful it is always transitory and you can choose to change life's course

[troutman]

Kick at the darkness until it bleeds daylight.

It gets better.

[SutterBrother]

Thanks for posting this thread. You're not alone.

[lazypucker]

Vinny, please reply here to let us know that you are OK.

CalgaryPuck is one of the most supportive forums that I ever encountered, and people here genuinely care about each other.

[Zoller]

me too buddy, me too...

They say misery loves company... Wanna go for a beer and shoot the #### about how much we hate ourselves?

I can tell you all about how having a dog will prevent you from killing yourself.

You should see my little sweetheart, you'd love her.

Get a dog.

[SeeGeeWhy]

Same here...

Really easy to be there when you're burnt out, and stuck in a bad set of circumstances with no quick fixes. Be gentle with yourself. You're going to need to intervene to calm the negative self-talk right now, and get inside of your window of tolerance.

It's a nice day out, go for a walk until you stop hating yourself. This is what I do, and it works every time. Sometimes it takes an hour or a little more, but usually 20 - 40 minutes does it. It also helps to find a spot like a secluded bench where you can have a good cry. Let it happen, its the fastest way for the body to dump huge amounts of cortisol out of the system.

Longer-term, when you're in your window of tolerance, there are other things to do. Both to expand the window itself, and to address conditions bringing you the stress.

"Myself" is your identity, which like it or not, is a myth that is created and is not fixed. Who you are hating is your past self, for bringing your current self pain, effort, regrets in this moment... and yet your current self barely exists beyond a blink.

There are a lot of things that you can change about "myself", on purpose. You can "kill" parts of your identity and be reborn in new ways.

But.. that's a lot of painful effort with uncertain reward. Thus our ego steps in to protect the brain from even contemplating it. The answers you're looking for are hiding in those shadows.

The ego is very clever and will hide things from your consciousness. It is a vigilant protector, and means well, but will absolutely harm you as an overzealous protector.

Recognize that these negative thoughts are nothing more than a signal your body is trying to send through the shadows, telling you that there is something in your environment that is wrong, harming you, and needs to change. The ego distorts these signals, you do not need to believe the distorted message.

Thank your body for sending the message. Acknowledge your ego for doing what it believes to be best, but ask it to relax and let the truth through. Assure it that you're ready to hear it. Ask your body to phrase its warning in a different way so that you can understand what needs to change.

You will meet your fears doing this. It is essential that you do. Sit and have tea with them, so they lose their power over you, over your identity. Incorporate them in a healthy way that serves you and your purpose, that allows you to be seen and your gifts to be known and shared.

I know that your ego will say you don't have a purpose, gifts to share, worthiness to be seen, etc. All of this is untrue. Let it say so, and say I don't believe you.

The person you hate doesn't exist anymore. You don't need to hold that in your heart. Forgive yourself, and become what you really are.

[dissentowner]

Originally Posted by lazypucker

Vinny, please reply here to let us know that you are OK.

CalgaryPuck is one of the most supportive forums that I ever encountered, and people here genuinely care about each other.

That is not entirely true. When I posted my struggles in the mental health thread there was a lot of genuine people who reached out, especially musth. However there are also some seriously horrible posters on here that will try to drive you off the cliff. If you are over sensitive like me about what people say about you and you are already in a bad place it can be hard to cope with. Most of us on here would give you the shirt off our backs to help you out though. Feel free to PM me if you want to talk about stuff or share stories. Sometimes it helps to talk to someone else who is struggling with self esteem and depression. I hope you are well.

[fotze2]

Originally Posted by SeeGeeWhy

Same here...

Really easy to be there when you're burnt out, and stuck in a bad set of circumstances with no quick fixes. Be gentle with yourself. You're going to need to intervene to calm the negative self-talk right now, and get inside of your window of tolerance.

It's a nice day out, go for a walk until you stop hating yourself. This is what I do, and it works every time. Sometimes it takes an hour or a little more, but usually 20 - 40 minutes does it. It also helps to find a spot like a secluded bench where you can have a good cry. Let it happen, its the fastest way for the body to dump huge amounts of cortisol out of the system.

Longer-term, when you're in your window of tolerance, there are other things to do. Both to expand the window itself, and to address conditions bringing you the stress.

"Myself" is your identity, which like it or not, is a myth that is created and is not fixed. Who you are hating is your past self, for bringing your current self pain, effort, regrets in this moment... and yet your current self barely exists beyond a blink.

There are a lot of things that you can change about "myself", on purpose. You can "kill" parts of your identity and be reborn in new ways.

But.. that's a lot of painful effort with uncertain reward. Thus our ego steps in to protect the brain from even contemplating it. The answers you're looking for are hiding in those shadows.

The ego is very clever and will hide things from your consciousness. It is a vigilant protector, and means well, but will absolutely harm you as an overzealous protector.

Recognize that these negative thoughts are nothing more than a signal your body is trying to send through the shadows, telling you that there is something in your environment that is wrong, harming you, and needs to change. The ego distorts these signals, you do not need to believe the distorted message.

Thank your body for sending the message. Acknowledge your ego for doing what it believes to be best, but ask it to relax and let the truth through. Assure it that you're ready to hear it. Ask your body to phrase its warning in a different way so that you can understand what needs to change.

You will meet your fears doing this. It is essential that you do. Sit and have tea with them, so they lose their power over you, over your identity. Incorporate them in a healthy way that serves you and your purpose, that allows you to be seen and your gifts to be known and shared.

I know that your ego will say you don't have a purpose, gifts to share, worthiness to be seen, etc. All of this is untrue. Let it say so, and say I don't believe you.

The person you hate doesn't exist anymore. You don't need to hold that in your heart. Forgive yourself, and become what you really are.

Fack! I hate when you read something and think “well that poster is a lot smarter than me”. Guess I’m stupider than I thought.

[bluejays]

I sent you a DM, my friend. I hope you're alright.