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Old 02-24-2014, 06:59 PM   #1
photon
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My wife wants to do some reading and wants to read something romantic and/or steamy. I tried to convince her Dune was romantic but she didn't buy it.

So I'm out of my wheelhouse, any suggestions along these lines? I'd kind of like to suggest something actually good, rather than the search and replace romance novels you always see in airports and Safeway (search and replace because they just search/replace the characters names and re-release the book with a new title).

Looking for recommendations because lists can be so deceptive, Goodreads "Best Top Romance Novels of All Time" has Twilight as #4....
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Old 02-24-2014, 07:12 PM   #2
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Bwahahahahahaha

I'm sorry photon. LOL. You just made me die of laughter. I'm a bit tipsy.

I remember reading Fire Island when I was in middle school. Some raunchy stuff there!
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Old 02-24-2014, 07:15 PM   #3
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Good luck finding advice about romance novels on a hockey message board. Having said that, Ann Rice wrote some romance novels under the name A.N. Roquelaure. They're called the Sleeping Beauty Trilogy.
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Old 02-24-2014, 07:21 PM   #4
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The Outlander Series, by Diana Gabaldon. The 8th book in the series comes out later this year, and there's also a movie being released this summer (Ron Moore is doing the adaptation/producing, Starz is carrying it).

The books in order are:

Outlander
Dragonfly in Amber
Voyager
Drums of Autumn
The Fiery Cross
A Breath of Snow & Ashes
An Echo in the Bone (just waiting for the jokes with that one, lol)

The 8th book that will be released in June is Written In My Own Heart's Blood. There is a spin off book series from Outlander, known as the Lord John books/series.

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Old 02-24-2014, 07:36 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DownInFlames View Post
Good luck finding advice about romance novels on a hockey message board. Having said that, Ann Rice wrote some romance novels under the name A.N. Roquelaure. They're called the Sleeping Beauty Trilogy.
That's not romance, that's erotica. S&M erotica actually, but if you're into that....

Nora Roberts is the queen of romance. Her novels are well written and intelligent. She can do everything from western to sci-fi romance and has another series under the name JD Robb that is a futuristic murder/mystery type romance.

DO NOT GET DANIELLE STEELE. She's terrible.
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Old 02-24-2014, 07:47 PM   #6
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My wife's best friend who lives in Kelowna has a few books available on Amazon. Her name is Elizabeth Kelly and she gets really good reviews - they combine romance/erotica and super natural. She has a few series out as well
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Old 02-24-2014, 08:36 PM   #7
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Nora Roberts, Susan Elizabeth Phillips
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Old 02-24-2014, 08:40 PM   #8
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The Black Dagger Brotherhood.

/thread
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Old 02-24-2014, 08:43 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DownInFlames View Post
Good luck finding advice about romance novels on a hockey message board.
Heh, there are some females around and who knows what some guys might like to read. I'd probably be a sucker for coming of age novels since I love those kinds of movies (The Way Way Back kinda thing).
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Old 02-24-2014, 08:44 PM   #10
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I keep seeing Lolita on lists, I've read it and I don't think she'd like that lol.

Thanks for all the suggestions!
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Old 02-24-2014, 08:54 PM   #11
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The Outlander Series, by Diana Gabaldon.

I read the first book of this series while dating a girl who was obsessed with them. Such drivel.
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Old 02-24-2014, 08:56 PM   #12
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Ok. *shrug*
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Old 02-24-2014, 10:07 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DownInFlames View Post
Good luck finding advice about romance novels on a hockey message board. Having said that, Ann Rice wrote some romance novels under the name A.N. Roquelaure. They're called the Sleeping Beauty Trilogy.

Lol those are not even close to romance novels, but yeah go ahead buy her those. . .
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Old 02-24-2014, 11:01 PM   #14
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My grandmother read a lot of smutty books with Fabio on the cover.

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Old 02-24-2014, 11:04 PM   #15
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Top 10 Romantic Books


http://entertainment.time.com/2007/0...omantic-books/

http://publishersweekly.com/pw/by-to...ine-s-day.html

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Old 02-24-2014, 11:12 PM   #16
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I haven't read it, but it seems like the ladies really like Time Traveller's Wife when it comes to steamy romances.
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Old 02-25-2014, 07:12 AM   #17
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I haven't read it, but it seems like the ladies really like Time Traveller's Wife when it comes to steamy romances.
You are right, it's been a while since I read it, but yes a fantastic book for this purpose.

(oops horrible typo)

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Old 02-25-2014, 07:45 AM   #18
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Penthouse Forum

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Old 02-25-2014, 09:52 AM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by photon View Post
My wife wants to do some reading and wants to read something romantic and/or steamy. I tried to convince her Dune was romantic but she didn't buy it.

So I'm out of my wheelhouse, any suggestions along these lines? I'd kind of like to suggest something actually good, rather than the search and replace romance novels you always see in airports and Safeway (search and replace because they just search/replace the characters names and re-release the book with a new title).

Looking for recommendations because lists can be so deceptive, Goodreads "Best Top Romance Novels of All Time" has Twilight as #4....
if she wants steamy/smutty Sylvia Day would be good. My ex loved her books, plus it would get her a little worked up so I would benefit too
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Old 02-25-2014, 10:22 AM   #20
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There's got to be a steamy novel generator on the internet somewhere so you don't have to actually pay money for one

You know enter her name? Cynthia Feddle-Cochring
Enter her occupation divorce lawyer
Is she a virgin? Yes
enter his name? Ramington Steelewood
Enter his occupation Retired millionaire astronaut
Is he a virgin? No
Where does this story take place? Chicago

Press generate for the story

Chapter one

Cynthia trembled excitedly as the hot summer weather in Chicago rolled over her like a rough lovers calloused hands. This was it, it was finally the night. As a divorce lawyer Cynthia had heard many tales of infidelity involving bondage, multiple partners and farm animals, and sometimes at night she would think about them as she bit into her pillow so her neighbors wouldn't hear her screams of esctacy as she rode wave after wave of pleasure, but she had never known the love of a man or a woman or a farm animal. Cynthia was a virgin. But that was going to change tonight as she pulled her cute little Mercedes Benz (product placement here) convertible through the secured gates of Ramington Sandlewood's sprawling estate.

She had met him a few weeks back when he swept into her office asking to see a lawyer. She was instantly captivated by the intensity of his eyes, his brooding chin, his slightly receeding hairline and the slightly too tight cut of his britches.

He had woo'd her from that moment, first inviting her out for drinks, then inviting her to play a sweaty intense game of morning racquetball where he seductively fondled the racquet balls while waggling his eyebrows at her, and finally flogging her in an abandoned parking structure with a 13 foot bull whip. But she had never been to his house or been truly intimate with a man.

She sat in the car, feeling her loins pulls heatedly like they might explode in a heat pulsy tight way with anticipation, suddenly the door opened and Ramington came running down the steps bouncing two basket balls like a hot sweaty bulgy NBA star while waggling his trimmed eyebrows at her. He open the door ans whispered too her "I ordered pizza for two from (product placement).

the evening swept by, they ate pizza, laughed fondled the butler and got aroused by watching all of the twilight movies. Then he finally whisper "Would you like to my bedroom?" Cynthia nodded wordlessly her heart threatening to explode out of her chest. He grabbed her by the foot and sexily dragged her to his room.

When they got there he sexily stripped his shirt off in the moonlight. She admired the butterfly tattoo over his pierced nipple and his "Crips rule" tattoo over his belly button. She sighed as her nipples pushed out against her JC Penny T-Shirt and he squinted as he stared into some headlights.

"I'm a virgin" she breathed heavily as her nether regions moistened like a towelette.

"So am I" he confessed as he yanked his tear away pants on and proudly showed his manhood.

"Really" Cynthia coo'd

"Yea baby" he boosted "That stuff in prison really doesn't count"

"Now come over here and pet daddy's favorite dog"

Passion over took Cynthia, everything was moist or pointy or whatever all at once, she became an animal trembling in anticipation as she reached out for Ramington's rod

"Its really hot in here" Cynthia moaned "can you use this to prop the window open" she gasped as she handed him the inanimate carbon rod.

To be continued

See now you don't need to buy one, I guarantee that the above is just as terrible as a professional one

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