Anthony Bourdain dead at 61

[CliffFletcher]

Originally Posted by Mr.Coffee

Is anyone else a little surprised at how popular he was? I honestly had no idea. Not right or wrong, good or bad, just surprised. I had no idea he meant this much to people.

Bourdain came across as unusually authentic, and that's probably why his death has affected people this way. He never seemed like he was acting or presenting a persona, which I find extraordinarily rare when it comes to entertainment. Watch a few of his shows and you felt you knew and liked him.

[Locke]

Originally Posted by CliffFletcher

Bourdain came across as unusually authentic, and that's probably why his death has affected people this way. He never seemed like he was acting or presenting a persona, which I find extraordinarily rare when it comes to entertainment. Watch a few of his shows and you felt you knew and liked him.

As though if you were in a restaurant and he just showed up, sat down and ordered a beer it would be the most natural thing in the world.

"Oh! Hey Tony."

[Table 5]

Yeah, he was one of the very few celebrities out there who I could actually admire and aspire to. In contrast to all the vapid, self-important blowhards out there these days, Anthony came across as a truly genuine person. He was cool as hell, but in a totally approachable manner...or at least he came across that way.

[OldDutch]

Just heard his long time best friend Eric Ripert found him. Just devistating as they were as close friends as you can be.

Won’t lie this whole ordeal has eire parallels to my experience, and it is choking me up bad. I have followed Eric for years as his life view is close to mine. Tony reminds me of my friend as he was always getting me to travel the world and experience new culutres with him. We went to SE Asia and South America among many places together. Before he died many refered to us as two people being on a seperate plain of life. We were like brothers.

I didn’t physically find my friend (he was in a different city at the time). I did however recieve the last phone call from him. I will never forget it. I knew something was wrong and asked a neighbor to go check on him. That neighbor called me and told me what just happened. I had to look his Mother in the eyes and tell her he was gone. I will never forget that.

I know this is supposed to me a memorial thread for Tony. So I will back out from this thread after this post. However, I want everyone to know the unintended devistation this does cause so many loved ones. I have been carrying this around for 10 years now.

Please if you are feeling like giving up, and you feel alone reach out. If you notice someone withdraw reach out. Care for each other. This won’t stop what happened to me or Eric or so many others, but just try. Know that people still do love you here, and will be far more hurt you left.

[missdpuck]

Never liked him; thought he seemed like a miserable guy actually.


Very sad though. RIP.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[ben voyonsdonc]

I bought my first Bourdain book in 2003 and watched every episode of A Cook’s Tour, No Reservations, and The Layover multiple times. I’m less of a fan of Parts Unknown but I still regularly watch it.

It is so unbelievably sad to recognize that a person who you thought you knew everything about was struggling so terribly in silence. I don’t believe in heaven but I believe that many of Bourdain’s experiences on earth were close to what my heaven would look like.

[WhiteTiger]

Originally Posted by Reneeee

Jeez.... Too many celebrity suicides. One has to wonder what is causing all of these

One can debate the root causes of suicide, but since there is usually a stigma attached to it, they'll come in 'waves', if you will. Which is generally why media sources don't report on suicides. There can be nasty spikes in both completed and attempted suicides, post a completed celebrity one.

[snootchiebootchies]

Originally Posted by WhiteTiger

One can debate the root causes of suicide, but since there is usually a stigma attached to it, they'll come in 'waves', if you will. Which is generally why media sources don't report on suicides. There can be nasty spikes in both completed and attempted suicides, post a completed celebrity one.

Experts are concerned about 'suicide contagion' amid the trend of rising suicide rates in the US

http://www.businessinsider.com/suici...-the-us-2018-6

A study of Canadian teenagers in 2013 found that the youngest among them (12- and 13-year-olds) were the most at risk of attempting or thinking of attempting suicide after the death of a classmate. This was especially true for kids who'd lived through "previous stressful life events," the researchers wrote. Whether the teens knew the person who died personally wasn't important — a finding that suggests exposure to irresponsible media coverage of suicides can be harmful for the very young (among others).

Madelyn Gould, a professor of epidemiology at Columbia University, has written and spoken extensively about the dangers of suicide contagion. In a 1990 study published in the American Journal of Public Health, Gould and four co-authors found that so-called "suicide clusters" seem to happen mostly among teenagers and young adults. But they noted the phenomenon can occur at other ages as well.

Because of those age-specific risks, concerns about suicide contagion were raised after the release of Netflix's series "13 Reasons Why." In the finale of the show's first season, a teenage girl takes her own life in graphic detail — a portrayal that contradicts guidelines from mental-health experts about how to depict suicide in a way that doesn't encourage others to follow suit.

A study published in the Journal of the American Medical Association after "13 Reasons Why" came out last year found that Google searches for the phrase "how to commit suicide" were 26% higher in the two weeks after the show's release than would have been expected. Searches for "commit suicide" and "how to kill yourself" were 18% and 9% higher, respectively.

[MolsonInBothHands]

Originally Posted by Flames_Gimp

Lmao I was waiting for the wheelchair Stab, I expect no less

My standing up for my opinions like a man prove otherwise, at least I don’t make a drive by post and run away, I’ll take the heat, I’m not a coward.

Yeah it was a low blow, a stab, as you say... just know it wasn't genuine, and I hated even typing it. It isn't something I would ever say to someone, and mean it, especially when I have no friggin' clue what their life struggles are, or how they deal with them.

I was hoping you would see the absurdity in my statement, and then possibly see the absurdity in yours.

I have had close family members and friends suicide. I used to think exactly like you regarding the selfishness of it. Seeing the aftermath of what it does with those left to cope and grieve would be enough for any one in their right mind to be deterred from suicide themselves.

Then when depression and anxiety crept in on me, I could start to understand how, slowly, what starts out as (fantasizing?) gets darker and darker. Luckily I had influences strong enough to give me a slap in the right direction. It is always something I have to be aware of though.

So I do get your anger, I really do. The sympathy for someone dealing with such powerful demons is something I had to learn the hard way.

Anyway, hope to see you back soon, and I hope there are no hard feelings.

[longsuffering]

Kind of spooky that episode 1 of No Reservations was in Paris.

Sent from my MIX using Tapatalk

[gargamel]

According to Eric Ripert, Bourdain had been "in a dark mood these past couple of days." Could be a coincidence, but that matches up with the timeline of the Daily Mail posting photos of Bourdain's girlfriend, Asia Argento, looking very friendly with a young reporter on Tuesday.

If that's what drove him to it, I can at least take some comfort in the possibility that he did enjoy his life, but that he couldn't take having another relationship fall apart.

[icecube]

Originally Posted by MolsonInBothHands

Yeah it was a low blow, a stab, as you say... just know it wasn't genuine, and I hated even typing it. It isn't something I would ever say to someone, and mean it, especially when I have no friggin' clue what their life struggles are, or how they deal with them.

I was hoping you would see the absurdity in my statement, and then possibly see the absurdity in yours.

I have had close family members and friends suicide. I used to think exactly like you regarding the selfishness of it. Seeing the aftermath of what it does with those left to cope and grieve would be enough for any one in their right mind to be deterred from suicide themselves.

Then when depression and anxiety crept in on me, I could start to understand how, slowly, what starts out as (fantasizing?) gets darker and darker. Luckily I had influences strong enough to give me a slap in the right direction. It is always something I have to be aware of though.

So I do get your anger, I really do. The sympathy for someone dealing with such powerful demons is something I had to learn the hard way.

Anyway, hope to see you back soon, and I hope there are no hard feelings.

[GreatWhiteEbola]

Originally Posted by MolsonInBothHands

It's a shame you gave up on standing on your own two feet so long ago FG. Must be nice to just sit on your ass and judge someone without understanding what their struggles really are.

Whoa! WTF!

How are you still a member of this community?

RIP Anthony

[Minnie]

Depression Isn’t Sadness and Suicide Isn’t a Cry For Help…

Blog piece written by Steve Safran, thought it was a good read. This line stands out to me. Depression is not about what we have; it’s about what has us.

Kate Spade. Anthony Bourdain. Two gut-punching suicides that have people asking “Why them? They had it all!” Sure, Bourdain lived a hard life, but Kate Spade, the queen of whimsy? She was wealthy, adored and…

Depressed.

We need better words. One of the biggest disservices to the field of mental health is to call the diagnosis of “depression” by the name “depression.” Everyone “gets depressed.” It’s a commonplace word: “I’m so depressed the meeting I planned fell through.” “The ending of that show was too depressing.” “He’s too depressing to be around.”

None of these examples has anything to do with the psychological definition of Depression. People who live with depression are wired differently. Our brains perceive life differently than those who do not have depression. Let me put it another way. Suppose you were born left-handed in this predominantly right-handed world. Suppose that was considered OK from time to time, but generally not an excuse to use your dominant hand. Righties would say “Why are you using your left hand? Your right hand works perfectly well.” Or, “I had a cousin who was left handed, but with a lot of work, he forced himself to use his right hand.” Or, “Why not just use your right hand? You wouldn’t need the special scissors.” But I’m still a lefty, you’d say. I’d like to be a righty, but everything comes out all wobbly and it’s so uncomfortable. Can’t you just understand I’m part of the 10 percent of the population that is left handed?

Depression is exhausting. And it’s cruel. It tells you terrible things about yourself. That’s why Ms. Spade and Mr. Bourdain died. I can’t speak for their experiences, but I can speak for my own and what I know to be true from many other patients with depression: our minds become ruthless bullies. They tell us the meanest things about ourselves. They stockpile ammunition and open fire. And we have to sit there and take it because, well, it’s coming from our own brains. 45,000 people committed suicide in 2016. Suicide rates are up 30 percent just since 1999, according to NBC news. Only about half of those victims were known to have a mental health diagnosis. We do not talk about this issue enough, and when we do, we don’t really know what we’re talking about, or when we do, Depression is conflated with “feeling depressed.”

News organizations have taken to posting suicide hotline numbers when they run stories about suicide. That’s a responsible act of journalism, but it’s like running the number for 911 in an article about a car accident. People with depression know there is help, but their brain is telling them it’s time to die. The evil mix of ill-behaving neurotransmitters and whatever they have been through in life lands on a singular message: You must kill yourself.

Even in that moment, they know they have friends they can call. They know there are hotlines. But they are not interested in anything other than stopping that message, stopping the pain. I suggest much more empathy in this area. As someone who has lived with anxiety and depression since the days of mixtapes, I’ve heard lots of well-meaning (and sometimes not so well-meaning) people say it all: “You’ve got a great life. What do you have to be depressed about?” (I don’t know. What do you have to be left-handed about?) “There are lots of people who have it worse off than you.” (Yes. And I still have depression.) “Just smile. How hard is it just to be happy?” (As hard as it would be for you to become left-handed while people insisted you use the regular scissors.)

My personal experience with this rotten condition has been horrid. I am certain I would have been more successful in my career without depression. For years, especially when I was younger, I wasn’t treated properly. As I got older, I was blamed for the illness that gripped me, as though it was a choice I made. I was called “lazy,” and put on meds that had me gain a ton of weight. People I loved mocked my illness, likely out of discomfort they may have it themselves. (They’re not much in the picture anymore.) In any case, there was not a lot of empathy.

We can’t stop suicide and depression. But we can understand it a lot better. I raise money for Movember, which supports research for men’s cancer and also the depression that can accompany it. This is something tangible I feel I can do. But all of us can do this: we can stop telling people with depression to “cheer up.” We can be more sensitive to this very real, very misunderstood disease. Those of us with depression do not want to be treated as a protected class. We don’t want special rights or to be treated gently. You can’t make me depressed any more than you can make me a lefty. Empathy and acceptance are an enormous gift to those struggling to ignore the mean messages from their own minds.

Think about Robin Williams. Think about Kate Spade. Think about Anthony Bourdain. Think about the joy they brought you in their unique ways. Think about what you would have said to them, knowing they were going to take their lives. “Don’t do that” would not have worked. Instead of shameful, head-shaking whispers, let’s acknowledge suicide as the growing epidemic it is, and insist health care do more to support mental health.

Depression is not about what we have; it’s about what has us.

[CliffFletcher]

It's a mistake to assume everyone who commits suicide is suffering from depression.

[troutman]

Just watched the new Berlin episode, a favorite city of mine.

Anton Newcombe of Brian Jonestown Massacre tells Anthony he likes Berlin because he can be invisible there, and Anthony says "that must be nice".

[afc wimbledon]

Originally Posted by troutman

Just watched the new Berlin episode, a favorite city of mine.

Anton Newcombe of Brian Jonestown Massacre tells Anthony he likes Berlin because he can be invisible there, and Anthony says "that must be nice".

It is hard to believe Newcombe can stay invisible anywhere for more than a day or two

[troutman]

Originally Posted by afc wimbledon

It is hard to believe Newcombe can stay invisible anywhere for more than a day or two

Indeed. It is reported he made a shocking rape joke in Sydney last night:

http://junkee.com/brian-jonestown-massacre/162850

[Ducay]

Originally Posted by troutman

Indeed. It is reported he made a shocking rape joke in Sydney last night:

http://junkee.com/brian-jonestown-massacre/162850

Shocking? Christ that's about a grade 2 level joke. Sure the media can push it as abhorrent in the our PC culture, but its certainly not shocking unless you're a nun.

[CorsiHockeyLeague]

Suppose you were born left-handed in this predominantly right-handed world. Suppose that was considered OK from time to time, but generally not an excuse to use your dominant hand. Righties would say “Why are you using your left hand? Your right hand works perfectly well.” Or, “I had a cousin who was left handed, but with a lot of work, he forced himself to use his right hand.” Or, “Why not just use your right hand? You wouldn’t need the special scissors.” But I’m still a lefty, you’d say. I’d like to be a righty, but everything comes out all wobbly and it’s so uncomfortable. Can’t you just understand I’m part of the 10 percent of the population that is left handed?

Even in that moment, they know they have friends they can call. They know there are hotlines. But they are not interested in anything other than stopping that message, stopping the pain. I suggest much more empathy in this area. As someone who has lived with anxiety and depression since the days of mixtapes, I’ve heard lots of well-meaning (and sometimes not so well-meaning) people say it all: “You’ve got a great life. What do you have to be depressed about?” (I don’t know. What do you have to be left-handed about?) “There are lots of people who have it worse off than you.” (Yes. And I still have depression.) “Just smile. How hard is it just to be happy?” (As hard as it would be for you to become left-handed while people insisted you use the regular scissors.)

This is such a good analogy. I've always compared this discussion to an attempt to explain to a visually impaired person what the colour green looks like. But I think I'm going to have to steal this.