Calling all crotchety married people.

[Sliver]

Originally Posted by Rubicant

It's the exact same thing with us. Perhaps my wife and I should have a talk - if I died she would have no idea where / how much money we have.

I made a spreadsheet for my wife in that event. I also have a copy with our wills. It lists all of our holdings, who the contact is to access them, account numbers, etc. If you don't have something like that you probably should. I update it every month and know our net worth down to the penny.

[Rubicant]

Originally Posted by Sliver

I made a spreadsheet for my wife in that event. I also have a copy with our wills. It lists all of our holdings, who the contact is to access them, account numbers, etc. If you don't have something like that you probably should. I update it every month and know our net worth down to the penny.

Yeah, you're definitely right on there. When we didn't have money it wasn't such a concern.

[Ducay]

Originally Posted by Thumper17

You really should have sorted this about before tying the knot.

That said, the idea I had would be that, since I like videogames and electronics and thats expensive, and womenfolk often like exspensive clothes and bags. We would have seperate luxury spending accounts. So we can buy our own stuff, and then there would be a joint account for all the bills/kids/gasoline etc.

The more I read about them, the more I HATE the idea of these "allowance" or "luxury" accounts, since it just gives you more reason/leeway to drop cash on ######ed things. If I love say, expensive clothes, that should be built into your spending habits and budget for the whole family unit.
Giving yourself, say, $1,000 a month to spend on fun stuff is just a recipe for overspending and arguments.

[Sliver]

Originally Posted by Rubicant

Yeah, you're definitely right on there. When we didn't have money it wasn't such a concern.

Mo' money, mo' problems.

[Rathji]

Originally Posted by Thumper17

You really should have sorted this about before tying the knot.

That said, the idea I had would be that, since I like videogames and electronics and thats expensive, and womenfolk often like exspensive clothes and bags. We would have seperate luxury spending accounts. So we can buy our own stuff, and then there would be a joint account for all the bills/kids/gasoline etc.

And I HATE HATE HATE HATE the idea of a credit card and I never want to own one. So she could have the credit card.

My wife felt the same way until we applied for a mortgage and she didnt have any positive credit to her name.

[V]

Originally Posted by Table 5

I want any solution to be as simple as possible, fair as possible, and most of all, prevent any future argument.

I make it, she spends it. Simple, fair and agreed upon, so no future arguments.

Done.

[chemgear]

Originally Posted by V

I make it, she spends it. Simple, fair and agreed upon, so no future arguments.

Done.

Man, that's depressing.

[Dion]

I never married and my money is all mine. No arguments over how it should be spent and no one telling me I spent too much money on golf clubs and the game itself. Being single has it's advantage's.

[Dion]

Originally Posted by V

I make it, she spends it. Simple, fair and agreed upon, so no future arguments.

Done.

Are you a man or a mouse?

[Frank MetaMusil]

Originally Posted by Dion

Are you a man or a mouse?

I won't judge without pics.

[WhiteTiger]

My wife and I have separate accounts. We do budgeting together, so we know how much is going where, but my wife has a personal business, and so keeps that separated as well. It's not that much extra work, honestly.

It basically boils down to me taking care of the rent, her taking care of the rest of the bills and most of the incidentals. Which works out to a pretty 50/50 split of the monthly expenses. We each have our own credit card(s) and we each make sure that there is some 'allowance' in there for our various hobbies.

[afc wimbledon]

Originally Posted by chemgear

Man, that's depressing.

No, that's marriage.

[Slava]

Originally Posted by Rubicant

It's the exact same thing with us. Perhaps my wife and I should have a talk - if I died she would have no idea where / how much money we have.

Ya, you ought to have that talk! My wife knows where the accounts are and who to contact, but part of that is the nature of my business (she would contact my business partner). You just never know when you won't make it home that night, so its good to make sure you/she would know what to do and who to contact. In my case its fairly easy as most of the insurance policies and investments are in one place.

[Slava]

Originally Posted by Locke

The ones that dont ask questions always are, arent they?

Well I better note that I'm just kidding. I wouldn't want any of my clients to get the wrong idea and think I don't want to talk to them!

[THE SCUD]

Originally Posted by Ducay

The more I read about them, the more I HATE the idea of these "allowance" or "luxury" accounts, since it just gives you more reason/leeway to drop cash on ######ed things. If I love say, expensive clothes, that should be built into your spending habits and budget for the whole family unit.
Giving yourself, say, $1,000 a month to spend on fun stuff is just a recipe for overspending and arguments.

???

There is zero difference between "budget for the whole family unit" for the luxury / non-essential purchases and an allowance. In fact, if your significant other is not financially literate, an allowance is better.

An allowance lets then know "you have $500 a month for handbags". If they want a $3,500 Louis bag they realize they have to save up for 7 months. If you just 'budget' for it enjoy the $3,500 credit card charge you weren't expecting.

Not having an allowance only works if both parties are on the exact same page and even then it can create arguments when, inevitably, one person goes shopping and spends more than the other "thinks is reasonable".

An allowance is, as a general piece of advice, advisable for 90-95% of couples. Only when two tight wads unite, or one person controls the purse strings 100% does 'budgeting for discretionary items' make sense.

Now my 0.02 on the OP's question:

My wife and have everything going into our joint chequing accounts, and have several joint savings, USD and EURO accounts. We have our own RRSPs, TFSAs, and investments, however I manage them. My wife is aware of what we have, in the event of my demise. I maintain a small balance in my 'bachelor' account, just to keep on good terms with the bank I'd used since childhood, and she has one with her old credit union (we're talking under $500 combined) just to keep the accounts in good standing.

All bills are paid out of the common account and a meticulous budget is prepared using mint.com. We are both emailed when there are overages and we then review our expenditures by category monthly and look where we went over. These budgets are generally rolling budgets, so Mint knows to deduct it from next month's budget. This way we have the best of both worlds - my wife has an allowance for non-discretionary spending in that if she goes over the $500 clothing budget for the month, it comes out of next month. It shows you that you need to pull back these types of expenditures going forward, to accumulate budget room.

If there are bigger purchases to be made, we will discuss them and then make them, and I will manually classify them as non-recurring in mint so it does not effect the budget.

IMO, as an accountant, a rolling budget like the above along with discussion for non-recurring expenditures is the best. It allows you to build an allowance inside the framework of a rolling budget but also allows you to, after a discussion, earmark items as non-rolling if they truly shouldn't count against your budget (allowance).

However, in the case of people who can't maintain a rolling budget, a simple allowance system works just as well and is generally recommended.

[First Lady]

Originally Posted by Table 5

I'm a weeny graphic designer.

You draw weenies? Like this:



On topic.

Everything goes into one account. When I met my husband his online ad said he was good a generating money and equally good a spending it. Over time we have brought some balance to the latter part of the equation.....

Since he is out of town 50% of the year I handle all financial matters.
Generally we discuss major expenditures. Though there was the one time he basically called me from the car dealer lot to tell me we had a new truck....

[Deegee]

All the money goes into one joint account. A small transfer goes into our TFSAs every month.

The remaining amount goes away to bills, and then whatever is left my wife spends quickly to ensure that our money is rotated like grocery stock. The old stuff is used before the new stuff is delivered.

Mind you, we're also single income with a kid, so it will get easier once she goes back to work in some manner (or starts watching kids at home).

[MarchHare]

Originally Posted by afc wimbledon

No, that's marriage.

No, it's really not.

There's no reason joint finances need to be adversarial or cause marital problems. Using the method my wife and I setup, we enjoy all the benefits of being single (so long as it's within our means, each of us can buy whatever we want whenever we want no questions asked) plus the benefit of splitting all our bills and living expenses 50-50.

[THE SCUD]

Originally Posted by MarchHare

No, it's really not.

There's no reason joint finances need to be adversarial or cause marital problems. Using the method my wife and I setup, we enjoy all the benefits of being single (so long as it's within our means, each of us can buy whatever we want whenever we want no questions asked) plus the benefit of splitting all our bills and living expenses 50-50.

Sounds more like cohabitation than marriage, IMO.

Also, does the bolded part of your quote mean you're swingers?

[SeeBass]

^^^that's the rule in my house too.

Respect, trust and freedom not much to ask. If you don't have this you are doing it wrong.