Legit question....How does a "time out" work? I didn't have those during my childhood, but it seems like everyone uses them these days. Does it mean they have to be silent for a few minutes or something? Do you send them to their room?
Legit question....How does a "time out" work? I didn't have those during my childhood, but it seems like everyone uses them these days. Does it mean they have to be silent for a few minutes or something? Do you send them to their room?
To clear things up, I don't like the "time out" method. I don't think it teaches the child any consequences of their actions. But...that's just me.
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To clear things up, I don't like the "time out" method. I don't think it teaches the child any consequences of their actions. But...that's just me.
It depends on how you do it.
If you remove the child from the situation (usually it is a fun situation, that got out of hand for the child) and set them aside. Discuss with them the reason they have to sit down and the type of action(s) that is/isn't acceptable. I often leave it to my kids to decide when they can come back and rejoin the activity (they are 6 and 8). They often sit out longer than I would have made them sit out.
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Legit question....How does a "time out" work? I didn't have those during my childhood, but it seems like everyone uses them these days. Does it mean they have to be silent for a few minutes or something? Do you send them to their room?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Table 5
Sorry, maybe I worded it wrong, but I was asking what it was. What happens when you give the kid a time out?
Quote:
Originally Posted by undercoverbrother
It depends on how you do it.
If you remove the child from the situation (usually it is a fun situation, that got out of hand for the child) and set them aside. Discuss with them the reason they have to sit down and the type of action(s) that is/isn't acceptable. I often leave it to my kids to decide when they can come back and rejoin the activity (they are 6 and 8). They often sit out longer than I would have made them sit out.
I think undercoverbrother worded it best, here.
I guess the only reason I don't agree with this method, is when it's the ONLY method a parent uses. I know plenty of parents that ONLY use this method...no other.
Again, it should be used as a tool among other tools, imo.
This kind of ######ed crap is why I don't want to have kids. I'd have no say in how to raise them, it would all be written up for me in the nice manual provided and woe to the parent who strays from the mandated rules of child rearing and discipline.
Legit question....How does a "time out" work? I didn't have those during my childhood, but it seems like everyone uses them these days. Does it mean they have to be silent for a few minutes or something? Do you send them to their room?
I always answer the 'you wouldn't hit a coworker' response with 'better that than assualt/forcible confinement charge putting them in a time out would cause'
The idea that you treat children the same way you treat adults is inane
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I know on Loveline, Dr. Drew has always maintained that the key difference between discipline and abuse is whether the adult uses an object to strike the child, as opposed to a standard spanking.
Hey, I was abused! of course so was everyone else in the UK in the 70's
Legit question....How does a "time out" work? I didn't have those during my childhood, but it seems like everyone uses them these days. Does it mean they have to be silent for a few minutes or something? Do you send them to their room?
A 'time out' involves sending a kid to their room, or some other area that is away from other people. The typical time of a time out is 1 minute per age of child.
I like to give my kids 'time ins' for most minor offences, since it is clearly a punishment, but won't have the kid feeling all dejected because they did something minor. Plus it has the bonus of not sending a kid, who might be having impulse control problems, into an area with no direct supervision. This is particularly true with my 3 year old, since he has a ton of energy, and will often get 'unleashed' if he is sent to him room as a punishment. For example, a 'good example' might be during his 3 minutes he might play with every toy in his room, or try and read a bunch of books and then dig through his dresser for some cool new socks; a 'bad example' might be he relieves himself on his sisters floor, then sneaks into the washroom and tries to dramatically recreate Niagara Falls over our vanity sink before we can hear the water running.
Sure I can discipline him for that stuff as well, but it would just turn into a nasty spiral that has me sitting outside his room with the door shut until I have to get something done.
With a time in, he is right in your sight, and is easily corrected if he does something wrong, and it is a real punishment.
Quote:
Originally Posted by AC
I know on Loveline, Dr. Drew has always maintained that the key difference between discipline and abuse is whether the adult uses an object to strike the child, as opposed to a standard spanking.
Anything other than spanking on the bottom with an open hand is punishable under the Criminal Code.
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Last edited by Rathji; 09-04-2012 at 05:20 PM.
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Legit question....How does a "time out" work? I didn't have those during my childhood, but it seems like everyone uses them these days. Does it mean they have to be silent for a few minutes or something? Do you send them to their room?
undercoverbrother covered it. Time-outs are actually on the out a bit, now "quiet time" is more in vogue. Quiet time is removed from the situation and has to sit quietly for 2 minutes in a designated spot (usually the same spot in each general area). Doesn't remove them from everything and you are still around (so doesn't generate a "get away from me you are bad" vibe that a timeout can), but enough separation to know that what they did wasn't the right choice.
Time-outs are usually the next level of escalation after quiet time.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Red-Mile-DJ
To clear things up, I don't like the "time out" method. I don't think it teaches the child any consequences of their actions. But...that's just me.
Sometimes there are no immediate consequences to actions other than some nebulous long term ones, so that's where quiet time and time out can be useful. When giving a direct instruction, go wash your hands, for example, there might be no other meaningful consequence.
But I agree, natural consequences or ones that derive logically from a situation usually work much better, but sometimes there aren't any (or can't think of one at the time).
Also can be used to help teach for self-regulation, sometimes behaviour is just because they're over-excited and a quiet time can help calm down. Having to sit on a chair for 2 minutes while his friends were swimming was very effective at reminding him to slow down and not run by the pool (where waiting for the natural consequence is probably not advisable )
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