Teenage Self-Injury

[Devils'Advocate]

The funny thing is that the cutters I have known actually were better off than some. At least they had some kind of release.

The vast, vast majority of cutters/self-harmers keep it to themselves, so I'm sure in my life I've known more than two. But most keep it locked up because of people like SaskaBushFire who says "cheer up jerk". And that attitude is common. It's the Dennis Leary school of psychology - "Shut the f'ck up! Next!"

For most, they get over it. I had suicidal tendancies in high school. Knife in bathtub and couldn't do it. Stupidly enough, it was only because I was afraid I'd screw that up and be forced to go to school with scars on my wrist. It's amazing how much things get better once you are out of high school. Or maybe it's simply because the suicidal kids or cutters turn to alcohol and drugs in high school and university and that becomes the all consuming release.

BTW - cutting is far more prevelant in girls than guys. I don't know they don't just shut the f'ck up and get happy.

[FireFly]

Cutting in girls is oftentimes directly related to a girls self image, especially about her weight. For some reason, skinny girls who think they're fat are more likely to cut themselves. Fat girls who think they're fat use food as their escape. This is why I'd love it if people wouldn't tease others about their weight. Unfortunately, the message doesn't seem to be getting through.

[Drunk Skunk]

Self-mutilation can mean quite a few different things, depending on who you ask. There are people that believe tattoos and piercings are self-mutilation. Inflicting pain on one's self can, as mentioned, be a way to focus. It's not something I do, because pain, well, hurts me. I think it's trendy today to make fun, or pick apart, someone that does something not in the mainstream or something that's not readily accepted by most people. There's very rarely any attempt to find out why a certain act is done, the act itself just gets condemned without any question.

In my opinion, scars on one's body can almost tell a personal story. I have more than a couple on my body, none self inflicted(intentionally anyway). Each time I sit and think about it, it's a means to remember a lesson, or a time in my life. Perhaps those people that choose to do that to themselves are making a "road map" of their lives, if you will. I don't mean to sound flippant about it, or disturbing, but they are serve as a bonding experience. Someone feels comfortable enough with another person to share why it happened, or is still happening.

I think a big part of it is also a morbid curiosity. There are people that live their lives without feeling much pain, be it physical or emotional, and they are curious to see what it is like. For others, I'd think that it would be the opposite. A way to physically or emotionally detach from what is happening to them. Not everyone can afford psychiatric help, and I know for a fact that some people see this as a way to release their tensions without having to see a specialist.

Whatever the cause, I don't think it's right for someone that hasn't gone through it to pass judgment on someone. I'm sure there are people that do it because their friends do it, or they saw it in a movie, but there are also people that do it because they think they need to. The hard part is finding out which person is doing it as a cry for help, and which person is doing it as a cry for attention. I'm not condoning self-mutilation, don't get me wrong, but I'm not going to mock someone for doing it. It's not a "don't knock it 'till you try it" thing. In my opinion, it's a "try not to judge someone until you've been in their situation" thing. I've probably gone on way to much about this, sorry.

[Weiser Wonder]

I knew a lot of people in high school that cut themselves. Most of my friends cut themselves, mostly because of emotional stress which runs high in High School. Lots of kids just don't know how to deal with it all. I have never cut myself, not the personality type. I never even want a tatoo or body piercing.

[Maserati]

Originally Posted by SaskaBushFire

Ignorance, like cutting yourself for attention and putting those around you through hell because of it?

honestly the person who is doing the cutting should think about those who are close to him/her cause it is really upsetting to someone who cares.I know this from personal experience.Cause I feel helpless as I try to help that person and yet she keeps on doing it over and over make you feel helpless and wonder what can be done.

[Phanuthier]

Originally Posted by Blaster86

Ban me I don't care

but

You're a ****ing idiot.

Thirded

Unbelievable how ignorant some people can be

RE: Self-mutalation, someone mentioned its a cry for help like suicide, thats definatly true. I've known a few to cut themselfs.

Some do it to feel better, also true. I don't cut myself, but I used to use sandbags instead of normal punching bags to train, and it felt good to releave your stress on a a sandbag. My hands would burn like hell and would get shredded up if I didn't use gloves, but it would feel good. As said, it has to do with endorphins, epinephrine, ect. When I play hockey or soccer, I like to get physical, get hit or lay a big hit. When I get into a fight or I'm sparring, it feels good to get hit sometimes. Pain does feel good for some.

[redforever]

Originally Posted by Maserati

honestly the person who is doing the cutting should think about those who are close to him/her cause it is really upsetting to someone who cares.I know this from personal experience.Cause I feel helpless as I try to help that person and yet she keeps on doing it over and over make you feel helpless and wonder what can be done.

If you really want to help, you have to get them to the appropriate professional who can help them deal with their problems. We are just lay people, and we can care and support, but in the long run, we can't help much beyond that. And unless your friend will go to a professional, the problem won't be addressed. Tis sad, but that is how it is.

And I don't really think it is fair to say, if they only knew how much we cared, they would not do this anymore. Their mind is not at that state, it is somewhere else. Same thing with those who commit suicide. Don't you think most of them leave loved ones behind who are grieving?

They have some kind of inner pain and turmoil. There might be a chemical imbalance, there might be some unknown trauma they are trying to deal with, there might be some stress they are not handling well, we do not really know. The brain is a funny thing and in terms of progress made for treating various disorders of the brain, we are just at the tip of the iceberg now. Much progress has been made for treatment of other maladies but the brain is a much more complex thing.

In the long run, the most loving and caring thing we can do for them is get them to a professional who can help them with their problems.

[Phanuthier]

Originally Posted by Maserati

honestly the person who is doing the cutting should think about those who are close to him/her cause it is really upsetting to someone who cares.I know this from personal experience.Cause I feel helpless as I try to help that person and yet she keeps on doing it over and over make you feel helpless and wonder what can be done.

I'm assuming this is a case where its done for attention, there is something you can do about it. I'd try getting her to sign a contract that she won't cut herself from 3 days, defining the time to be from when it starts to exactly 72 hours later. Make sure you have the details down pat, not just "3 days" but state "72 hours". Have the contract personally written up (not typed out) and signed as a personal promise. Work in cycles to try and get her to resign the contract, resigning contracts on a weekly basis (don't do something stupid like make it a 5 year contract) with the terms to last only a few days. Same procedure for suicidals as well.

[Daradon]

Cutting has been around way WAY longer than 'emos'

There are links to old tribal rituals.

I've been in the hospital many times in my life because of my heart coniditons and heart attacks. It's sounds weird as hell but pain makes me feel safe, almost taken care of.

I've never practiced any (serious or long term) self flagulation on myself but had had partners that we play with pain.

Pain is a part of life, really a beautiful part of life. The thing is, like anything else, (drugs, sex alcohol) is not to let it become and addiction or destructive.

[Devils'Advocate]

I wouldn't worry too much about cutters. There are far, far worse things. It is a very small percentage of cutters the make the leap to suicide.

In a way, it's like a poor mans drug. As per my chart above, cutting makes you feel energetic, alive, in control... and most of that is the endorphine rush.

Most doctors will prescribe Naltrexone or another endorphine inhibitor which eliminates the high and then therapy/drugs for the source cause. But the person has to want to stop cutting or they won't take the Naltrexone.

[Daradon]

Cutting is more about a feeling of control (often like bulimea and such) over a cry for help. Any suicidal attempts usually have nothing to do with the actual affinity for cutting and there are many many cutters than never attempt, just like many attmpt but never cut.

[redforever]

Originally Posted by Phanuthier

I'm assuming this is a case where its done for attention, there is something you can do about it. I'd try getting her to sign a contract that she won't cut herself from 3 days, defining the time to be from when it starts to exactly 72 hours later. Make sure you have the details down pat, not just "3 days" but state "72 hours". Have the contract personally written up (not typed out) and signed as a personal promise. Work in cycles to try and get her to resign the contract, resigning contracts on a weekly basis (don't do something stupid like make it a 5 year contract) with the terms to last only a few days. Same procedure for suicidals as well.

I shudder when I think of this. I knew 4 people who committed suicide, 2 adolescents, one young adult and one middle aged adult. Signing contracts is not the answer!!! Therapy and counselling is and you can't get them to a professional for help fast enough. Suicide is so compound, so many factors, but all require professional help. Of course, there is never a 100% success rate even with professional help but without it, the rate of success is pretty abysmal.

Please, if you know someone is suicidal, or think they are suicidal, please, please, please try and get them to a professional. Nothing is sadder than attending the funeral of someone who has committed suicide.