Edmonton is No Good XII: "I Dunno.. it's Just Not Good."

[dirk diggler]

Coffey as special advisor? Lets the players know what PJ's to wear when they go to big daddy daryl's house for sleepovers?

[McG]

And right on cue, noted expert staples weighs in on Carter hart. I’m not even going to link to it.

[GioforPM]

Originally Posted by McG

And right on cue, noted expert staples weighs in on Carter hart. I’m not even going to link to it.

It's my birthday today and Edmonton is No Good.

[taxbuster]

Originally Posted by GioforPM

It's my birthday today and Edmonton is No Good.

Happy Birthday...and make sure you celebrate that Edmonton No Goodness in an extra-special manner!!

[McG]

Mavi Diary - Day 12

Hola Diary! That’s Spanish because I’m all pumped up from the Vitamin D in my Corona Sunbrews! Whew weee that’s great vitamin D!

Met another famous hockey player. Mark Messier! Or as he said, please call me Hockey Hall of Famer and TBS Analyst Mark Messier.

He told me that he uses that name because people keep calling him the second best hockey player from St. Albert, and he needs to ensure that people know who he is. I asked who was #1…Troy Murray? He said no…some everyday normal person from Boston, but I didn’t get that.

He told me that he has to share the naming of an ice complex with Troy Murray, whereas Everyman got his own rink. I told him not to worry about me. Lauren has already designed a monochrome two rink facility…I’m going to call rink #1 Connor and rink #2 MacDavid. Originally I was going to call rink #1 “#9” and rink #2 “#7” because of my numbers but Lauren said people weren’t as smart as I was with numbers and math and stuff and they might get confused. I also don’t want people using my primary emotion “disgust” when they talk about my facility so we changed it.

I’m going to have a petting zoo too and I was going to call it Leon’s because of uhhh…Leon, but Lauren said it should be named after an animal like Lenard and not confuse people thinking it was for furniture. I was like Leon’s an animal especially when he spears you. Advertising writes itself too. “Get off of Katzie’s couch and pet Leon” and “throw your Dog’s balls at Leon’s” or “Leon’s kicking your skates to get here soon!”. It’s called Lenard’s now.

Hockey Hall of Famer and TBS Analyst Mark Messier told me to be careful when they name a road after me. He said he was lucky because his road leaves Edmonton, whereas Mr. Gretzky’s road goes past on old strip club and a rat infested rink. I said I thought it was only the statue and not the road beside Roger’s place that had his name on it. I’ll check that out next time I’m downtown.

Adios diary!

[TheIronMaiden]

Edmonton is no good.

[McG]

Mavi Diary- Day 13

Dear Diary. My head hurts and I’m sunburnt. Those corona sunbrew pack a wallop. They are 0.05% and if you drink enough of them they really hit you. Good thing all of that vitamin D protected me when I fell asleep on the roof top patio of my personal monochrome cactus club!

I got a call from GM Stan asking where I was on the contract. I told him I wasn’t even able to read it because he didn’t send it over yet. He asked what I was thinking. I said “I’m thinking about lunch.” He thought I was being funny but it was the truth. I asked how the team building was going because it was really important for me to get awards and hit my bonuses.

He said that he had moved some players out to get more ice time for me and Leon and to pay us more money. He said that he had to pay boo-boo more money too but I told him that is defence and I don’t care.

He said that he had a group of 5 players that he was looking at and all of them fit the Oilers profile. I think he said that they had to get off the court so maybe they play tennis in the offseason? One of them is a goalie too!

Speaking of old people, Wormy called from Anaheim. He said that he went to rookie camp and met all of the moms and it was a target rich environment. He said if he kept his current M.O. (I think he meant memo) he would get released and would be back with the Oilers maybe even before the season starts!

Exciting times Diary!

[RedHot25]

https://twitter.com/user/status/1945636697363849587

[PaperBagger'14]

I didnt realize the other team was the Florida panthers

[memphusk]

Originally Posted by PaperBagger'14

I didnt realize the other team was the Florida panthers

Joke of the day goes to you. Bravo.

[Groot]

McDavid and Draisatl lose 6-2 in a beer league game.

Apparently Skinner joined them also.

[Robbob]

Originally Posted by Groot

McDavid and Draisatl lose 6-2 in a beer league game.

Apparently Skinner joined them also.

You didn't specify, but I am 99% certain you are talking about goalie Skinner based on the results.

[dino7c]

Oiler fans are so butthurt over this its hilarious

[TrentCrimmIndependent]

I guess the Panthers broke them.

[FlamesAddiction]

Originally Posted by dino7c

Oiler fans are so butthurt over this its hilarious

Oiler fans are butt hurt about something before breakfast.

[Reggie Dunlop]

Originally Posted by TheIronMaiden

Edmonton is no good.

You sure can say that again!

[Robbob]

Watching the video, it is good to see they are showing the same intensity we saw in the playoffs.

[McG]

Mavi Diary - day 14

Dear diary. Leon and I are taking a bit of flack online for a pickup beer league game we played in Newmarket.

Leon told me Stu Skinner was going to be the goalie and I said who? Even when a guy said “hey boys” I still didn’t know him. It was only when Leon and I were taking a shift off and a puck went in from somewhere, and I used my third emotion “disgust” through squinted eyes from the bench, that I recognized him. Yup, it was the same guy!

Leon and I skated together almost the entire game literally because as soon as we went a goal down we told the coach to play us together “the rest of the way”. Our team was not happy because apparently the players themselves actually pay for the ice time. I told them that where I play, they pay me for ice time. And the team that owns the ice does too!

We did good. I told them to dig in right effing now in the first intermission and it worked way better than the oilers because we tied period 2 and 3 2-2. Job done! If skinner had a shutout we would have won 2-0. So it’s all his fault.

Ref sucked though; I told him that Leon and I get power plays all game normally for me grabbing sticks and Leon and I falling down.

I’m a bit under the weather though; nausea, vomiting, puking, throwing up, technicolor yawns, etc were the 21 ailments that I was suffering from.

I felt at home though as oilers always lose their first game too. I told Leon “let’s go” after the game. I’m still the captain.

Until tomorrow diary.

[chemgear]

They blaming the refs again?

[midniteowl]

The refs didn't give them enough PP?