Edmonton is No Good XII: "I Dunno.. it's Just Not Good."

[dirk diggler]

Coffey as special advisor? Lets the players know what PJ's to wear when they go to big daddy daryl's house for sleepovers?

[McG]

And right on cue, noted expert staples weighs in on Carter hart. I’m not even going to link to it.

[GioforPM]

Originally Posted by McG

And right on cue, noted expert staples weighs in on Carter hart. I’m not even going to link to it.

It's my birthday today and Edmonton is No Good.

[taxbuster]

Originally Posted by GioforPM

It's my birthday today and Edmonton is No Good.

Happy Birthday...and make sure you celebrate that Edmonton No Goodness in an extra-special manner!!

[McG]

Mavi Diary - Day 12

Hola Diary! That’s Spanish because I’m all pumped up from the Vitamin D in my Corona Sunbrews! Whew weee that’s great vitamin D!

Met another famous hockey player. Mark Messier! Or as he said, please call me Hockey Hall of Famer and TBS Analyst Mark Messier.

He told me that he uses that name because people keep calling him the second best hockey player from St. Albert, and he needs to ensure that people know who he is. I asked who was #1…Troy Murray? He said no…some everyday normal person from Boston, but I didn’t get that.

He told me that he has to share the naming of an ice complex with Troy Murray, whereas Everyman got his own rink. I told him not to worry about me. Lauren has already designed a monochrome two rink facility…I’m going to call rink #1 Connor and rink #2 MacDavid. Originally I was going to call rink #1 “#9” and rink #2 “#7” because of my numbers but Lauren said people weren’t as smart as I was with numbers and math and stuff and they might get confused. I also don’t want people using my primary emotion “disgust” when they talk about my facility so we changed it.

I’m going to have a petting zoo too and I was going to call it Leon’s because of uhhh…Leon, but Lauren said it should be named after an animal like Lenard and not confuse people thinking it was for furniture. I was like Leon’s an animal especially when he spears you. Advertising writes itself too. “Get off of Katzie’s couch and pet Leon” and “throw your Dog’s balls at Leon’s” or “Leon’s kicking your skates to get here soon!”. It’s called Lenard’s now.

Hockey Hall of Famer and TBS Analyst Mark Messier told me to be careful when they name a road after me. He said he was lucky because his road leaves Edmonton, whereas Mr. Gretzky’s road goes past on old strip club and a rat infested rink. I said I thought it was only the statue and not the road beside Roger’s place that had his name on it. I’ll check that out next time I’m downtown.

Adios diary!

[TheIronMaiden]

Edmonton is no good.

[McG]

Mavi Diary- Day 13

Dear Diary. My head hurts and I’m sunburnt. Those corona sunbrew pack a wallop. They are 0.05% and if you drink enough of them they really hit you. Good thing all of that vitamin D protected me when I fell asleep on the roof top patio of my personal monochrome cactus club!

I got a call from GM Stan asking where I was on the contract. I told him I wasn’t even able to read it because he didn’t send it over yet. He asked what I was thinking. I said “I’m thinking about lunch.” He thought I was being funny but it was the truth. I asked how the team building was going because it was really important for me to get awards and hit my bonuses.

He said that he had moved some players out to get more ice time for me and Leon and to pay us more money. He said that he had to pay boo-boo more money too but I told him that is defence and I don’t care.

He said that he had a group of 5 players that he was looking at and all of them fit the Oilers profile. I think he said that they had to get off the court so maybe they play tennis in the offseason? One of them is a goalie too!

Speaking of old people, Wormy called from Anaheim. He said that he went to rookie camp and met all of the moms and it was a target rich environment. He said if he kept his current M.O. (I think he meant memo) he would get released and would be back with the Oilers maybe even before the season starts!

Exciting times Diary!