Rate your current mental health level out of 10

[Locke]

A Sad lamp? Like the PIXAR mascot?

[Erick Estrada]

Originally Posted by Locke

A Sad lamp? Like the PIXAR mascot?

I have a Sad Light. It's a Raiders LED wall sign. I turn it on and it makes me sad that it's been over 20 years of dysfunction and losing. Maybe one of these days one of my sports teams could actually win something to make all the fandom worth it lol.

[photon]

Originally Posted by Locke

Right. Second point, sorry to quote you twice...

"Team by Team Basis" unfortunately has some baked in flaws.

1. Not everyone wants to train people, but they should. Thats how young employees get experience.

2. Who makes the 'team by team' basis decision? Because I can tell you who would make those decisions and they're usually the least qualified people to make that call.

3. A lot of young employees gain experience and understanding just by watching the Veterans do it. You can't do that if they're not there.

And then...if you solve a difficult problem, together? You hit the pub and commiserate about it.

Again. Can't do that if you're not there.

It should be the manager for that team as (in theory) they'd be best positioned to know what's best for the team and be able to consider other factors like junior people growing their careers and developing general work and team skills. That said maybe the manager doesn't care about that and just does whatever is easiest for them so I guess only in theory.

As opposed to now where it's a decision made based simply on some exec's KPI or having empty offices looks bad. Because were I am now you don't even have to go to the same office as your team or sit in the same area as your team as long as you physically show up in ANY office for the requisite # of days to still attend all meetings and interact via Teams.. kind of proving that they don't actually care about any actual benefits of working together in the office.

[Winsor_Pilates]

Originally Posted by Paulie Walnuts

Are we looking for something called a SAD lamp? The one Dion posted doesn't say SAD but light therapy.

How does it differ from like a regular night lamp? Gives off different type of energy?

SAD = Seasonal Affective Disorder
I don't think the lamp specifically needs to say that to be designed to help with the disorder. They probably shy away from that as they can't claim to fully fix a disorder.

[Puppet Guy]

^ yeah, I just call it my SAD lamp. It isn't trademarked or anything. Guess I should call it my "happy lamp", same way my meds are called "happy drugs".

[Puppet Guy]

Originally Posted by Locke

A Sad lamp? Like the PIXAR mascot?

I think that lamp is more focused than sad.

[Locke]

Originally Posted by Puppet Guy

I think that lamp is more focused than sad.

It should have NO emotions! It is a Lamp!

Inclusion is getting out of control these days!

[Paulie Walnuts]

Originally Posted by undercoverbrother

We got my boy this one:

https://www.costco.ca/happylight-hal...000101037.html

If anyone wants, I saw this in store yesterday for 69.99 on sale.

[DoubleF]

Originally Posted by Puppet Guy

They won't light up the whole room, so you'll need to sit close to the lamp. But there's no right or wrong time to use it (morning worked best for me). At your desk or when eating breakfast or whenever you can sit down during the day will do the trick, and regular (daily) use makes a big difference.

Have you ever tried using the circadian rhythm function on the Phillips Hue light bulbs? I've heard it can elevate mood for people. No idea on its effects on someone with SAD.

I used to use the Hue light alarm. It was also pretty awesome to emulate the Hue light by using the Hue bulbs with the Sleep Cycle app (paid app now, but worth the price IMO) for sleeping and waking up. I quite liked how sleep cycle would track you and try to gently wake you up at a good time. I also liked how the light alarm incrementally increased in brightness until you basically woke up on your own terms. I also realized that I slept better if there was a light on, kinda like a nap, so sleeping with a dim light on that incrementally turns off worked well for me.

I haven't really used it or needed it since my kids were born, but I'm thinking of digging them out and trying them again to see if it will offer any improvement to my sleep quality.

[bluejays]

I'm personally not feeling well at all. Updating from my last situation.

I was having work troubles as well as personal parent health problems. Work was giving me a hard time about performance (which were largely just opinions). On the side I hired a lawyer to intervene and negotiate an out but the day I was going to initiate it I got a call from my boss saying they were stopping the hard time, and to take the time I needed to be with my parent. They also said they'd put me in a different "role" when I came back from vacation. I suspected something was up but it seemed genuine. I called up the lawyer and put a halt to the letter being sent.

I took 3 weeks vacation and came back a few weeks ago only to find out the budget wasn't approved and contractors who were on my project were let go and I'm taking up much of that work. It's not something I've done before but I'd take it up I told them.

Yesterday I have my performance review and they gave me a terrible rating (first time in my career), and they put it in writing, skirting many of the truths. Now it's apparent they stopped what was turning out a PIP, so that my performance rating would be rated badly and I'd have one bad one on the record to cover themselves for what may come next. They wrote I'm not suited for the role and exaggerated/biased a lot of what their perception was. Further in our discussion she didn't read me all that until after. I'll have to respond today in a rebuttal.

I'm desperate to find another role in my organization. I've never seen this happen but they just want to save money by giving me a hard time to quit. I'm reaching out to my internal network but the mental state they've put me in the past few months has been terrible. I started the employee assistance program for mental health but it wasn't useful (psychotherapist late, ending sessions early to get to their next, effectively leaving 15-20 mins talk time). So I'm starting to see a psychotherapist outside of the assistance program to deal with this anxiety and frustration. I'm not sure what I can do legally but they've put me in a terrible situation. I don't want to walk away from 18 or so years of service but my confidence is a 2, and motivation daily a 3. I feel they pulled a quick one the past couple months just so they could get this into my year end review to screw me further financially.

[undercoverbrother]

Originally Posted by bluejays

I'm personally not feeling well at all. Updating from my last situation.

I was having work troubles as well as personal parent health problems. Work was giving me a hard time about performance (which were largely just opinions). On the side I hired a lawyer to intervene and negotiate an out but the day I was going to initiate it I got a call from my boss saying they were stopping the hard time, and to take the time I needed to be with my parent. They also said they'd put me in a different "role" when I came back from vacation. I suspected something was up but it seemed genuine. I called up the lawyer and put a halt to the letter being sent.

I took 3 weeks vacation and came back a few weeks ago only to find out the budget wasn't approved and contractors who were on my project were let go and I'm taking up much of that work. It's not something I've done before but I'd take it up I told them.

Yesterday I have my performance review and they gave me a terrible rating (first time in my career), and they put it in writing, skirting many of the truths. Now it's apparent they stopped what was turning out a PIP, so that my performance rating would be rated badly and I'd have one bad one on the record to cover themselves for what may come next. They wrote I'm not suited for the role and exaggerated/biased a lot of what their perception was. Further in our discussion she didn't read me all that until after. I'll have to respond today in a rebuttal.

I'm desperate to find another role in my organization. I've never seen this happen but they just want to save money by giving me a hard time to quit. I'm reaching out to my internal network but the mental state they've put me in the past few months has been terrible. I started the employee assistance program for mental health but it wasn't useful (psychotherapist late, ending sessions early to get to their next, effectively leaving 15-20 mins talk time). So I'm starting to see a psychotherapist outside of the assistance program to deal with this anxiety and frustration. I'm not sure what I can do legally but they've put me in a terrible situation. I don't want to walk away from 18 or so years of service but my confidence is a 2, and motivation daily a 3. I feel they pulled a quick one the past couple months just so they could get this into my year end review to screw me further financially.

####ing horrible.

I saying this knowing changing jobs/companies isn't easy but why would you want to stay in that organization.

Before this current role (2 1/2 yrs) I was with a big company (11yrs). I watched how they backstabbed and drove out one of my contemporaries who had been there 17 yrs and was key to their growth over those years.

Corporate Leadership in conjunction with HR ####ed him proper.

It was awful to see, but made me realized if that is how they treated him how would they treat me.

Do yourself a favour and look.

I thought my options were small but have found a better role for more $$ and more responsibility.

[bluejays]

Originally Posted by undercoverbrother

####ing horrible.

I saying this knowing changing jobs/companies isn't easy but why would you want to stay in that organization.

Before this current role (2 1/2 yrs) I was with a big company (11yrs). I watched how they backstabbed and drove out one of my contemporaries who had been there 17 yrs and was key to their growth over those years.

Corporate Leadership in conjunction with HR ####ed him proper.

It was awful to see, but made me realized if that is how they treated him how would they treat me.

Do yourself a favour and look.

I thought my options were small but have found a better role for more $$ and more responsibility.

I get it. Honestly the organization isn’t like this as a whole. But I think they’re scapegoating me. Sometimes things can get out of hand and they go down a path they can’t take back to save face. It’s awful as a human being because I’ve been so good to them. I haven’t seen anything like this before but have heard of a PIP recently being delivered to someone who was eventually fired. It messed her up mentally and I’m getting there even without one.

I don’t want revenge but I don’t want to be railroaded and laying down like I always tend to do. I also have earned a potential severance that they should be paying but understand they don’t care about people’s pain and do whatever is best for the company. It’s a tough place to be in.

[PepsiFree]

I think any work situation where you’re involved a lawyer to deal with your employer is already too far gone and basically a sign the end is approaching sooner rather than later.

Your two options are to look for something else, or be a good soldier and wait to get fired so that you can collect a severance (depending on your age and how long you’ve been there, this could be worth it). It’s also fairly easy to collect the severance you’re owed if you have a lawyer, so I wouldn’t worry about whether they should be paying it or not.

But, in general, always remember that your employer is your employer, and you are the employee. No matter what and regardless of how many good personal relationships you have with them, at the end of the day you’re an asset and an expense. So don’t take business decisions personally, and don’t convince yourself personal stuff will win out, because that’s not the norm.

Sometimes you have to be cutthroat. Forget about how good you’ve been to them or them to you in the past, make sure you’re covered and compensated legally.

[PaperBagger'14]

Originally Posted by bluejays

I get it. Honestly the organization isn’t like this as a whole. But I think they’re scapegoating me. Sometimes things can get out of hand and they go down a path they can’t take back to save face. It’s awful as a human being because I’ve been so good to them. I haven’t seen anything like this before but have heard of a PIP recently being delivered to someone who was eventually fired. It messed her up mentally and I’m getting there even without one.

I don’t want revenge but I don’t want to be railroaded and laying down like I always tend to do. I also have earned a potential severance that they should be paying but understand they don’t care about people’s pain and do whatever is best for the company. It’s a tough place to be in.

Not to further discourage you but any time a company is leaning towards a PIP is usually a bad sign, regardless of them doing it in good faith or otherwise. Changing someone’s role, firing all the contractors below them and then complaining about performance is royally setting you up to fail.

Now might be a good time to look at other job opportunities, that’s where my mind would go to anyways. Best of luck.

[8sPOT]

Yeah that situation is full of red flags unfortunately. Sounds like you're very loyal, but they are essentially the exact opposite towards you. That's just not sustainable in my opinion, I'd recommend you start looking around for other options, you deserve better!

I left the company I was with a year ago after being there for 12 years. One of the best decisions I ever made was actually leaving. Super scary and certainly a risk but 100% worth it.

[bluejays]

I’m super grateful for y’all and the advice. Challenge really is where your head is at to apply elsewhere and think about the interview process and if your new place will look at you like this. This has been truly horrible and brought on anxiety I didn’t think I had. As a result my self confidence is wondering if I should be a Walmart greeter to avoid conflicts in the future. Everyone is right but state of mind plays so huge into this.

[Geraldsh]

Originally Posted by bluejays

I get it. Honestly the organization isn’t like this as a whole. But I think they’re scapegoating me. Sometimes things can get out of hand and they go down a path they can’t take back to save face. It’s awful as a human being because I’ve been so good to them. I haven’t seen anything like this before but have heard of a PIP recently being delivered to someone who was eventually fired. It messed her up mentally and I’m getting there even without one.

I don’t want revenge but I don’t want to be railroaded and laying down like I always tend to do. I also have earned a potential severance that they should be paying but understand they don’t care about people’s pain and do whatever is best for the company. It’s a tough place to be in.

Get out! But don’t leave without your severance package, you have earned it and deserve it.
An acquaintance of mine had all his work/projects given to coworkers so he had nothing to do. There was no just cause to fire him and he refused to quit without his severance so he sat there and read the news for the last entire year of employment.
Good thing he didn’t know about CP or he would have dominated every conversation for the last year.

[undercoverbrother]

Originally Posted by bluejays

I’m super grateful for y’all and the advice. Challenge really is where your head is at to apply elsewhere and think about the interview process and if your new place will look at you like this. This has been truly horrible and brought on anxiety I didn’t think I had. As a result my self confidence is wondering if I should be a Walmart greeter to avoid conflicts in the future. Everyone is right but state of mind plays so huge into this.

I get you.

I hadn't applied for a job in 20 years.

All my jobs had been through contacts and were simple chats and hired.

This job I have now was 8 interviews, #### me I wasn't sure I would get through it.

But it is worth it.

I wish I had explored opportunity sooner.

I don't know about you, my hatred of my company and job bled into my life and marriage.

So much so that I nearly lost my wife.

Please don't get to that point.

[Locke]

Originally Posted by bluejays

I’m super grateful for y’all and the advice. Challenge really is where your head is at to apply elsewhere and think about the interview process and if your new place will look at you like this. This has been truly horrible and brought on anxiety I didn’t think I had. As a result my self confidence is wondering if I should be a Walmart greeter to avoid conflicts in the future. Everyone is right but state of mind plays so huge into this.

Go back to the Lawyer. That sounds like 'Constructive Dismissal.'

Orchestrating circumstances to make an employment situation intolerable so the un-desired employee leaves of his own volition to remove any responsibilities on the employer.

I've had a company do that to me. Its a long and sordid story involving an 'implied non-compete agreement' as well...thankfully I won...but it was like a bad 90s office movie.

They made my life a living hell.

[CroFlames]

Between the Russia thread, the US Politics thread, the optometrist thread, and some financial things coming up, things are feeling kinda bleak.

Hard to put a number on it, but we're not a 10/10 for sure.