Rate your current mental health level out of 10

[Johnny Makarov]

who knew night clubs could make or break a city?

[malcolmk14]

Originally Posted by Traditional_Ale

With a minimum wage in real money worth more than a third year skilled trade here. With free museums and galleries housing priceless works. With a live music scene that is the envy of the world. With people who take pride in their towns, and genuinely feel a part of a community. With goddamn rent controls.

Just look at the pathetic fallout over something as simple as the Peace Bridge. By Calgary logic, London should tear down Big Ben to save on the cleaning bill. A city of 1.5-million people and no nightclubs? Berlin as a city in and of itself makes 2-BILLION euros a year from their nightlife.

There is nothing for anyone to aspire to in Calgary outside of only making money, because there is absolutely nothing else here anyone values at all. There has not been one single new legit museum or gallery built in Calgary in almost FOUR GENERATIONS.

If I'm going to be a broke nobody struggling to survive while continuing to pursue my dreams, I'm going to do it in a place where there are reasons to actually make it worth while.

lol

[Nyah]

Originally Posted by TorqueDog

- Filtering what I'm exposing myself to in terms of current events, news cycle, other 'drama', etc. We all have a certain amount of bandwidth for stuff in a day, and I was usually overrunning it substantially by paying way too much attention to stuff that didn't merit my attention.

This has been absolutely essential for me too. There is so much #### going on in the world, and there has been for 3+ years. I deleted Twitter off my phone, deleted my Facebook account and only use Instagram to keep up with friends and family and fun animal reels. I have zero tolerance for anything political on that timeline so I unfollow friends who use their platforms that way. It's not that I don't care about those issues too or that my friends/family care about them, but I just can't stay emotionally invested and maintain my happiness. It's exhausting. Similarly here I try to stay out of the polarized threads. It just brings me down watching people snipe back and fourth. I really don't understand how people have the energy for that.

Agree on the relationship front, too. I'm lucky that my partner is incredible and we've been together for 16 years now. But I have definitely had to cut some people out of my life and it's been for the better.

In the last year I finally properly addressed my ongoing anxiety & depression by going to the doctor and seeing a therapist for the first time since I was a teenager. It's been lifechanging. I'm on a fairly low dose of anti-depressant and I see my therapist once every couple of months. For the first time in
years, I'm not dreading the Christmas break and the inevitable spiral into anxiety and depression. I know I'm in a better place now.

I'm really trying to get myself into a healthy routine of jogging or even just walking on my treadmill for at least 15-20 minutes a day and I'm actually getting better! Who know that consistency would lead to actual, tangible results

Overall I'd say I float between 7 or 8 /10. Life is not bad and could absolutely be a lot worse. I'm really thankful for where I am right now in one of the most stable places in the world.

Just to re-iterate: if any of you are really struggling, reach out to your doctor and get on a path towards help. It's 100% worth it.

[undercoverbrother]

This might have been posted in here already, but there is a number that can be called or texted 24/7 for help:

988

https://www.canada.ca/en/public-heal...-helpline.html

Today, the Government of Canada is taking an important step to provide suicide prevention support for people who need it, when they need it most. 9-8-8, Canada’s new three-digit suicide crisis helpline, is now available to call or text, in English and French, 24 hours a day and seven days a week, across Canada.

[TorqueDog]

Originally Posted by Nyah

Similarly here I try to stay out of the polarized threads. It just brings me down watching people snipe back and fourth. I really don't understand how people have the energy for that.

Yeah, I've definitely implemented that here as well. If there's an interesting discussion to be had, great. But if it's largely misery porn masquerading as a thread, I'm out, and there's at least a couple.

[Lubicon]

Originally Posted by undercoverbrother

This might have been posted in here already, but there is a number that can be called or texted 24/7 for help:

988

https://www.canada.ca/en/public-heal...-helpline.html

Thanks UCB.

Timely post.

[TheIronMaiden]

I think social media habits 100% have an effect on your mental health. Deleting facebook, heavily curating my exposure to News are all key in daily rituals that keep me sane.

[DownInFlames]

I went through my subreddits and deleted the ones that are just negativity. Subreddits like r/idiotsincars and r/publicfreakout are full of people being ####ty and I get enough of that in real life. It’s definitely helped and along with other changes I doing much better than the 2 I posted about previously.

[WhiteTiger]

Originally Posted by DownInFlames

I went through my subreddits and deleted the ones that are just negativity. Subreddits like r/idiotsincars and r/publicfreakout are full of people being ####ty and I get enough of that in real life. It’s definitely helped and along with other changes I doing much better than the 2 I posted about previously.

This is something I've been doing a lot of lately, too. Just...cutting out the negative in as many aspects of my life as I can, and then realizing HOW MUCH negative there is.

As the meme goes..."Ain't nobody got time for that."

[OldDutch]

Should have posted here earlier but for me I was in a bad spot for quite a while. My best friends death and then my brother helped exacerbate frankly depression I had from being a father.

In October I found Jiu Jitsu and working out. I also invested in myself with braces and hair restoration. I put off taking care of myself way too long.

Also looked into Testosterone replacement. Ends up I don’t need it but I recommend looking into it as it maybe contributing to your mood.


Anyways 2 months in and I am way better shape, posture, I don’t take crap like I used to. I have my days but I can power through. Zoloft also helped but its not a magic bullet.

Don’t give up and fight to get up. Do what I did for yourself, no one is going to save you but you. I fought back and am finally feeling like I am winning.

[MRCboicgy]

Originally Posted by DownInFlames

I went through my subreddits and deleted the ones that are just negativity. Subreddits like r/idiotsincars and r/publicfreakout are full of people being ####ty and I get enough of that in real life. It’s definitely helped and along with other changes I doing much better than the 2 I posted about previously.

I was talking to my therapist and told her that I'm down to going through r/aww before bed and that's is the extent of my social media most days. She thought that was a positive, especially with looking at cute animals before sleep.

[TrentCrimmIndependent]

Originally Posted by TheIronMaiden

I think social media habits 100% have an effect on your mental health. Deleting facebook, heavily curating my exposure to News are all key in daily rituals that keep me sane.

After purposely creating a buffer between myself and the news for years but the news recently worming into the feeds of the couple of online platforms I still use, I can see just how much it weighs on the psyche because I had been away from it (and living relatively blissfully). The contrast between news vs no news was VERY pronounced.

The inundation of dramatic headlines and fearmongering if you click on any one thing and the algorithm gets its claws into you is some kind of mental poison.

Internet "news" is a new sort of ugly because it's catered to your interests and fears which makes it harder to ignore even if you're just scrolling past it.

[Scroopy Noopers]

2 years before covid started we had a reality fracturing horrific event happen in my extended family. It consumed my thoughts and days entirely for 2+ years, and just as it was wrapping up and people were getting closure, covid happened. I know everyone involved has/had been in a really tough spot for 5+ years… which is a wild number to type.

I evaluated, then re-evaluated my life, and then re-evaluated it 30 more times in that time frame. I had to make big changes in my life just to survive. One of them has been reducing my effort in maintaining relationships where the effort wasn’t reciprocal. This has essentially led to me losing most of what my circle would have been 6 years ago. Including family members. That’s been hard and gruelling, but I am poking my head out the other side of it lately and it’s feeling pretty good. It was absolutely the right move. I used to live with so much guilt about everything. Including me not making every possible effort to visit someone or do someone a favour. It’s been eye opening and refreshing to take a step back and see just how much of that I had manufactured in my own mind.

So, I’m in the middle high range of happiness finally. Been a long while with some scary times. I’m pretty lonely in terms of close friends, but I thankfully have a great relationship and friendship with my wife to help that.

[Erick Estrada]

Originally Posted by TorqueDog

Yeah, I've definitely implemented that here as well. If there's an interesting discussion to be had, great. But if it's largely misery porn masquerading as a thread, I'm out, and there's at least a couple.

Yeah I have been less involved posting on forums of late. Not because I don't enjoy the banter with everyone here and more just to stay out of topics that are overly negative or involve a lot of back and forth arguing. I just don't think getting involved in those types of discussions is productive or beneficial to me on a daily basis. There's just a lot of negativity on the internet in general and it's a matter of filtering out as much of that as you can and I try to prioritize more social interactions with my sons on a daily basis trying to be as involved and up to date on their lives as I can be.

[Huntingwhale]

Originally Posted by DownInFlames

I went through my subreddits and deleted the ones that are just negativity. Subreddits like r/idiotsincars and r/publicfreakout are full of people being ####ty and I get enough of that in real life. It’s definitely helped and along with other changes I doing much better than the 2 I posted about previously.

This is great advice. A few years ago I removed a bunch of subreddits from my feed that brought nothing but doom and gloom. Subs like r/politics, r/alberta, r/canada, r/coronavirus, etc. Nothing good comes from any of those subs unless you enjoy doom scrolling echo chambers of hate, paranoia and despair.

I still subscribe to certain news subs due to ongoing world events. But it's a good idea to mix in some more positive subs for the occasional dose of uplifting articles. Videogame subs, cat subs, travel subs, uplifting news usually give some positive vibes.

[Russic]

This raises an interesting conversation around limiting the news in your life. On one hand, some people get very bothered by people who don't "stay informed," while on the other, the news isn't exactly a perfect representation of what's going on in the world. They need results by way of clicks and eyeballs, and humans are naturally attuned to negative over positive, so I've found myself questioning if following the news is a good way of remaining informed.

The last election cycle was interesting because it's one of the first I actively avoided. Spent probably 10 minutes looking at candidate platforms, made a call based on that, and voted more or less the same way I would have had I submerged myself in a 3-month-long anger bath.

[TheIronMaiden]

Originally Posted by Russic

This raises an interesting conversation around limiting the news in your life. On one hand, some people get very bothered by people who don't "stay informed," while on the other, the news isn't exactly a perfect representation of what's going on in the world. They need results by way of clicks and eyeballs, and humans are naturally attuned to negative over positive, so I've found myself questioning if following the news is a good way of remaining informed.

The last election cycle was interesting because it's one of the first I actively avoided. Spent probably 10 minutes looking at candidate platforms, made a call based on that, and voted more or less the same way I would have had I submerged myself in a 3-month-long anger bath.

For myself, I make sure I only read the news when I am actively looking for it. Otherwise I remain vigilant against entertainment disguised as news.

In the same vain, I only talk about current events with people who are specifically informed. I talk with farmers about farming policies and teachers about the same. Otherwise I politely decline the subject, and if someone doesn't get the hint after a few hangs, I cut them off. I don't need to know about all the bad things in the world.

[CliffFletcher]

Originally Posted by Russic

This raises an interesting conversation around limiting the news in your life. On one hand, some people get very bothered by people who don't "stay informed," while on the other, the news isn't exactly a perfect representation of what's going on in the world. They need results by way of clicks and eyeballs, and humans are naturally attuned to negative over positive, so I've found myself questioning if following the news is a good way of remaining informed.

The last election cycle was interesting because it's one of the first I actively avoided. Spent probably 10 minutes looking at candidate platforms, made a call based on that, and voted more or less the same way I would have had I submerged myself in a 3-month-long anger bath.

When my kids were young I was concerned that they wouldn’t have newspapers around the house or TV news on in the evenings like I had growing up. I wanted them to be engaged with the news and politics like I was when was a teenager.

But given the state of news media and politics today, I’m actually okay with the fact my kids don’t follow the news. I think they’ll have a healthier, more true understanding of the world around them just through their own experiences than through the fear and outrage-peddling that passes for most news today.

If a particular issue appears on their radar I’ll steer them towards some sober, non-hysterical sources to learn more about it. And that’s enough.

[Spuds_Buckley]

Originally Posted by Traditional_Ale

It flips between a 1 and a 10.

10, being that I've been sober over a year now and have had so many miracles happen because of it that life is an exciting challenge again that I look forward to.

That awesome, good for you. I'm in the same boat with over one year of sobriety, and while it's not easy the benefits to my mental health are drastically improved.

I hate the whole culture of alcohol in Calgary, and especially in the energy sector, but I feel like that would be there no matter where you go.

Most of my childhood friends have moved away or I've lost touch with, so I could use a larger social circle. Job is good, home life is good - so overall I'd give it an 8.

[CaptainCrunch]

1-10 hah, I'm below zero right now.

After my contract ended in recruiting 6 months ago because the company I had been working for had blown through money and decided to get rid of contractors, and went into a hiring freeze.

I've had some work but very little. In the last 6 months, I've probably sent out 300 resumes with very little response. Even getting other resume professional's reviewing my resume and covers hasn't changed the depressing lack of results. I get it, I'm older, and older people don't get hired. But I'm feeling unwanted and un valued.

I've done work on the contract side but have taken several kicks in the teeth on that side, and don't have much coming through, and took a severe punch to the gut today, on a contract that I was bidding on that looked really good until one of my partners screwed it up and left me ineligible to bid.

Its tough to stay optimistic. After multiple years of straight hell on the family side, now its straight hell on my side.

After using my savings to get me through it that's coming to an end, I'm about to hit rocks, with no where else to turn.

Part of me doesn't want to be here anymore. I'm just tired out.

People tell me to keep my head up, and keep fighting through this. I don't know if I have that in me anymore.

Sorry for the vent.