You Know What Really Grinds My Gears? Now with 3x more gears...

[Locke]

Originally Posted by CliffFletcher

For a 4-year degree you’re looking at $50k in rent and living expenses. So yeah, that’s a downpayment on a house.

It depends on where they go to school.

For instance, I own a condo in Lethbridge as I've had 2 daughters and 4 nephews go through U of L.

The story of how I came to purchase it is interesting, and I likely wont make any money on it when it comes time to sell, but I'll probably break even overall and I've owned it for ~7 years?

Ironically I'll probably wind up selling it to my Realtor as his kids want to go to U of L right when mine should be finished.

[Slava]

Originally Posted by Sliver

Even if it is affordable, it's not necessarily a good use of familial resources. I'd rather that extra $10 - 15k go toward equity in a home or investments than a landlord in fricken Toronto. Way better to graduate with equity in something than rental debt.

Well, I'll take the other side of this. Sure, from a 100% financial side of things, it's not great. But, life is about a lot more than money. For me, and a lot of people my age, undergrad was the greatest time of our lives! Not because we were sitting in Astronomy or Ancient Philosophy learning things (although, that was pretty cool also). Because you were an adult, making your way in the world and spreading your wings. You were out on your own and didn't have mom and dad holding your hand and making sure that you were caught up on your reading or whatever.

My daughter is in her first month at UofC. I pushed for her to go somewhere else, but she opted not to. I think that's a shame. The UofC is fine and all, but it's a commuter school. She goes there, goes to class and does whatever, and comes home. She's not getting the full university experience and that's too bad. Is it cheaper? Sure. But it's not better.

[Roughneck]

then I'd like to put a down payment on a house for them to live in and rent half out to cover the mortgage. I see going out of town for school as a waste of money that puts you further behind financially at a fairly critical time in life.



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I won't be doing that. I'm going to keep their rooms theirs for as long as possible. I don't even have a big house, but I'd like the kids to have a comfortable place to come home to until they're well established in life.

Why keep the room theirs as long as possible if you're paying a mortgage on a different house they're living in, in the same city no less? Doesn't make any sense.



If the plan is to sell the place when they're done, why not just put a down payment on a house wherever they plan on going to school?

[Locke]

Originally Posted by Slava

Well, I'll take the other side of this. Sure, from a 100% financial side of things, it's not great. But, life is about a lot more than money. For me, and a lot of people my age, undergrad was the greatest time of our lives! Not because we were sitting in Astronomy or Ancient Philosophy learning things (although, that was pretty cool also). Because you were an adult, making your way in the world and spreading your wings. You were out on your own and didn't have mom and dad holding your hand and making sure that you were caught up on your reading or whatever.

My daughter is in her first month at UofC. I pushed for her to go somewhere else, but she opted not to. I think that's a shame. The UofC is fine and all, but it's a commuter school. She goes there, goes to class and does whatever, and comes home. She's not getting the full university experience and that's too bad. Is it cheaper? Sure. But it's not better.

I did the exact same thing, its essentially like going to High School.

Its why I encouraged my kids to go to school out of town.

I'd make an exception to that if the program locally was head and shoulders above anywhere else.

[Weitz]

Originally Posted by Sliver

Interesting perspective. I'm as insistent as I can be that they should stay in Calgary for post-secondary. My kids are in grades 11 & 12 right now, but I hope they stay at home for the first year or two, then I'd like to put a down payment on a house for them to live in and rent half out to cover the mortgage. I see going out of town for school as a waste of money that puts you further behind financially at a fairly critical time in life.

Plus, there is the risk of them meeting and pairing up with somebody from a different city. That just makes family get togethers, visiting future grandkids, spending easy/causal time together orders of magnitude harder. Fk that, I want to be able to hang with my kids more than just a couple times a year.

I would like to see them take a year off before university or after, though. Go live in a ski town or resort area or cruise ship or something for a year. Then you get some independence, an away-from-home experience and you get paid to do it.



I won't be doing that. I'm going to keep their rooms theirs for as long as possible. I don't even have a big house, but I'd like the kids to have a comfortable place to come home to until they're well established in life.

I won’t comment on most of this post, but I think it’s bad advice to take a year off after graduation. That will make life extremely difficult for a lot of programs you take from what I have seen. Before school absolutly go for it.

[chedder]

I'm in the let them go away camp. But really I'm in the let them make the decision camp. I laugh at the parents that make their kids stay home for school then these same parents go on a 10,000 dollar plus holiday. I'll sacrifice a few years of vacation to allow my kid to do what they want where they want. If cost is truly a concern then I understand. If you're just imposing your will then what is that teaching them?

I'm also in the camp that commuting to uni then home every night is missing out on a lot of what post secondary is about.

[Slava]

Originally Posted by chedder

I'm in the let them go away camp. But really I'm in the let them make the decision camp. I laugh at the parents that make their kids stay home for school then these same parents go on a 10,000 dollar plus holiday. I'll sacrifice a few years of vacation to allow my kid to do what they want where they want. If cost is truly a concern then I understand. If you're just imposing your will then what is that teaching them?

I'm also in the camp that commuting to uni then home every night is missing out on a lot of what post secondary is about.

I agree with this entirely. I'm in the "let them decide" camp, which is why my daughter is here. I went away for university and it was 100% the best decision I ever made.

[Dentoman]

Also depends what their academic/career goals are. If they are shooting for admittance to a highly competitive program that requires a degree first, I would recommend staying at home if possible to lessen the day to day stress of just living. Allows them to be able to focus on getting the best grades they can.
I enjoyed moving out to go to university, but I'm not gonna lie, I was jealous of my classmates who lived at home and used their student loans to buy new cars!! They also didn't seem to be missing out on the university experience either.

[Wormius]

Originally Posted by peter12

I was up in Calgary last weekend and went up to UCalgary. Holy smokes, it's changed. What a gorgeous campus.

It’s nicer than a lot of campuses. We toured around SFU and it looks like something from a dystopian future.

[Wormius]

Originally Posted by Weitz

I won’t comment on most of this post, but I think it’s bad advice to take a year off after graduation. That will make life extremely difficult for a lot of programs you take from what I have seen. Before school absolutly go for it.

I’d also say, during university, you have 4 months off each summer. Find a job outside the city or wherever and it’s basically a gap year without the financial drain.

[Knut]

Originally Posted by Slava

I agree with this entirely. I'm in the "let them decide" camp, which is why my daughter is here. I went away for university and it was 100% the best decision I ever made.

I made the decision to leave and not go to U of C due mostly to the fact all my buddies were not going to University. They spent the first two years post school working odd jobs and partying. I knew I needed to move away to remove that distraction. My parents wanted me to stay, but I knew i would be better off leaving. On top of that, I had the same friends since Elementary school and it really forced me to come out of my comfort zone and meet new people, have new experiences and grow as a young adult.

For my kids our ideal is that they stay but if they want to go we will support them in that.

[surferguy]

Originally Posted by Weitz

I won’t comment on most of this post, but I think it’s bad advice to take a year off after graduation. That will make life extremely difficult for a lot of programs you take from what I have seen. Before school absolutly go for it.

I was fortunate enough to travel for a year (working holiday visa) after I graduated. It may have been the greatest year of my life. It’s so important to go in my opinion.

“An education isn’t complete until you live and work someplace different than where you grew up.”

- surferguy -

[Weitz]

Originally Posted by surferguy

I was fortunate enough to travel for a year (working holiday visa) after I graduated. It may have been the greatest year of my life. It’s so important to go in my opinion.

“An education isn’t complete until you live and work someplace different than where you grew up.”

- surferguy -

I don’t disagree but we don’t look at new grads who haven’t worked for a year after graduation. And we’re not the only ones…

[Locke]

Originally Posted by chedder

I'm in the let them go away camp. But really I'm in the let them make the decision camp. I laugh at the parents that make their kids stay home for school then these same parents go on a 10,000 dollar plus holiday. I'll sacrifice a few years of vacation to allow my kid to do what they want where they want. If cost is truly a concern then I understand. If you're just imposing your will then what is that teaching them?

I'm also in the camp that commuting to uni then home every night is missing out on a lot of what post secondary is about.

Yeah, it all depends.

I guess for me when all was said and done the U of C was the most practical/best decision.

But school for me was pretty easy. I spent a lot of time partying.

But its difficult when you're going to school in the City you grew up in. You dont feel like staying on Campus or making a whole lot of new friends when all your other friends are right at home.

So it took a lot of effort to stick around, be involved, meet new people etc.

What really sold me was going to visit friends who did move away.

At the time I worked for Greyhound which meant I had free Bus Tickets to anywhere in Canada, and, as I said, school was pretty easy, so I'd take time to go and visit friends who did move away to school. So I'd visit them at U of T, Windsor, Brock and UBC and party and...the life of kids who moved away to go to school was intoxicating.

Which is why I encouraged it for my kids. Its a hell of an experience, even if the City you're moving to completely sucks...sometimes thats even better.

I never had more fun than when I went to Windsor...that town is awful, but when its crammed with University kids? Its a blast.

Getting 15 people together and wandering through Vancouver and Toronto? That is fun! More expensive than Windsor, but still.

I loved just hanging out in University Bars. That was one of my favourite things. The people you meet is just insane.

[Fuzz]

I assumed Sliver meant HS graduation, not University. Agree that right after University you want to find work ASAP. A gap year is great to do. Particularly if you aren't really sure what you want to do.

[Knut]

It is individual too i think. My oldest has significant learning disabilities but he is a gifted learner. It is likely best for him to remain home so we can help provide proper support for him. My youngest is super shy but Gifted as well. It might be best for him to go out and get out of his shell.

[CliffFletcher]

Originally Posted by chedder

I'm in the let them go away camp. But really I'm in the let them make the decision camp. I laugh at the parents that make their kids stay home for school then these same parents go on a 10,000 dollar plus holiday.

That’s a weird way to phrase it. If a family can only afford $10k a year to send a kid to university locally, instead of the $25k a year to send them out of town, are they making the kid stay home for school? Or just living within a middle-class budget?

That’s like saying if your 19 year old wants a brand new fully-loaded Mazda 3, but you can only afford to buy them a five year old Hyundia Elantra, then you’re making them drive a beater.

In both cases, the decision is ultimately in the hands of your kid, since they’re old enough to hold a job and take out loans. So the parents aren’t making their kids do or not do anything.

Just a reminder that the median household income in Alberta is $80k. Which is a far cry from the $250k+ that you’re probably going to need to come up with the $200k it will cost to put two kids through university out of town at $25k each a year.

[chedder]

Originally Posted by CliffFletcher

That’s a weird way to phrase it. If a family can only afford $10k a year to send a kid to university locally, instead of the $25k a year to send them out of town, are they making the kid stay home for school? Or just living within a typical middle-class budget?

That’s like saying if your 19 year old wants a brand new fully-loaded Mazda 3, but you can only afford to buy them a five year old Hyundia Elantra, then you’re making them drive a beater.

In both cases, the decision is ultimately in the hands of your kid, since they’re old enough to hold a job and take out loans. So the parents aren’t making their kids do or not do anything.

Just a reminder that the median household income in Alberta is $80k. Which is a far cry from the $250k+ that you’re probably going to need to come up with the $200k it will cost to put two kids through university out of town at $25k each a year.

The $10,000 example is roughly the difference between living at home and going away. In my experience it isn't $15,000 more. And you'll note I said if cost is an issue then living at home is definitely an option.

I just know parents that have made their kids stay at home (yes, made them) just so their lifestyle isn't cramped and because that's what they want the kid to do. Not talking about people that can't afford it.

Of course, I know everyone has a different view on how much they should help their children to get started as adults. I'm just of the view that if I have to forego personal non-essential purchases for a few years to help my kids that's what I'm going to do.

[bizaro86]

Originally Posted by chedder

The $10,000 example is roughly the difference between living at home and going away. In my experience it isn't $15,000 more. And you'll note I said if cost is an issue then living at home is definitely an option.

I just know parents that have made their kids stay at home (yes, made them) just so their lifestyle isn't cramped and because that's what they want the kid to do. Not talking about people that can't afford it.

Of course, I know everyone has a different view on how much they should help their children to get started as adults. I'm just of the view that if I have to forego personal non-essential purchases for a few years to help my kids that's what I'm going to do.

If the people you're talking about are adults then their parents can't MAKE them stay home if they truly don't want to. They might not be willing to pay for them to live elsewhere but they can't force them to stay either.

[TrentCrimmIndependent]

Every now and then you stumble into a thread and are reminded of how ancient CP is.