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Old 10-11-2022, 10:47 AM   #2981
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Nah, buns are there for the distraction. I always love seeing people take a bun...yeah, fill up on the cheap stuff you absolute moron.

Juicy turkey is the physical ####s. I deliberately dry mine out a bit. I really don't need avian juices running down my chin...that's nasty. Some nice and dry white meat, mashed potatoes and stuffing with some gravy on top is the best. And some coleslaw, too.
Bread is the best part of any meal. The mashed potatoes are for suckers. Nothing beats taking a bun and sopping up the last of what's on a plate.
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Old 10-11-2022, 10:48 AM   #2982
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Any of the following phrases and the people who use them:

If you know, you know.
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I did a thing...
Sorry, not sorry.
I was today years old...
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Old 10-11-2022, 10:49 AM   #2983
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Any of the following phrases and the people who use them:

If you know, you know.
Not all heroes wear capes.
I'm not crying, you're crying.
I did a thing...
Sorry, not sorry.
I was today years old...
Reddit speak is Embarrassing.
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Old 10-11-2022, 10:50 AM   #2984
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I've probably cooked a dozen turkeys in my life, and they've never once been dry. I did everything I could to screw it up this year (Samsung oven issues) yet it still turned out great.

But it's always dry when I'm eating elsewhere. I don't understand.
People overcook them.
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Old 10-11-2022, 10:57 AM   #2985
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Nah, buns are there for the distraction. I always love seeing people take a bun...yeah, fill up on the cheap stuff you absolute moron.

Juicy turkey is the physical ####s. I deliberately dry mine out a bit. I really don't need avian juices running down my chin...that's nasty. Some nice and dry white meat, mashed potatoes and stuffing with some gravy on top is the best. And some coleslaw, too.
Oh yeah, I'm with you on the buns. Thing is, we don't even bother with them at this point, so it never really crossed my mind.
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Old 10-11-2022, 10:59 AM   #2986
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I never understood salad with a turkey dinner. Like, thanks, where do I put this on my plate? Nowhere, that's where.
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Old 10-11-2022, 11:04 AM   #2987
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I'm just not a big turkey fan. It's fine, I don't dislike it, but for holidays like this I like breaking away from the norm and doing something else. Prime rib a few times over the last few years, roast chicken legs, Salmon, this year I worked all weekend just ordered KFC and called it a day
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Old 10-11-2022, 11:08 AM   #2988
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We had deep fried turkey this year. I was skeptical, but it actually turned out really nice. Also, because the stuffing wasn't actually stuffed in the bird, it didn't have those weird soggy bits and clumps like you normally get.
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Old 10-11-2022, 11:12 AM   #2989
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I think turkey gets overcooked because people time it instead of just using a thermometer. I have some idea of how long it's going to take, but when it gets within an hour I just start plugging in the thermometer, take it out at 160, and it's great every time.

I also don't think there's just one item that's above the rest. Getting a forkful with a little bit of turkey, stuffing, gravy, cranberry sauce? That's the best.
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Old 10-11-2022, 11:13 AM   #2990
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I think turkey gets overcooked because people time it instead of just using a thermometer. I have some idea of how long it's going to take, but when it gets within an hour I just start plugging in the thermometer, take it out at 160, and it's great every time.

I also don't think there's just one item that's above the rest. Getting a forkful with a little bit of turkey, stuffing, gravy, cranberry sauce? That's the best.
Ya, when I get asked "what time is dinner" the correct answer is "when the turkey is ready".
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Old 10-11-2022, 11:18 AM   #2991
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Turkey can be done in advance. "When the roast potatoes are ready" is the answer because those need to be served piping hot and crispy.
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Old 10-11-2022, 11:18 AM   #2992
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I recommend everyone learn how to spatchcock turkey. Cooks much faster and more evenly while also giving much more crispy skin and moist meat. It's the superior method in all regards.
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Old 10-11-2022, 11:22 AM   #2993
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Turkey skin seems like... too thick to me? Or something? Chicken skin is great, but I never eat the turkey skin. Even when crispy it's just kind of gross to me.
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Old 10-11-2022, 11:22 AM   #2994
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Mashed sweet potatoes is my Thanksgiving staple. Really don't do them any other time of year, but it's not Thanksgiving dinner without them.
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Old 10-11-2022, 11:30 AM   #2995
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sliver View Post
Nah, buns are there for the distraction. I always love seeing people take a bun...yeah, fill up on the cheap stuff you absolute moron.

Juicy turkey is the physical ####s. I deliberately dry mine out a bit. I really don't need avian juices running down my chin...that's nasty. Some nice and dry white meat, mashed potatoes and stuffing with some gravy on top is the best. And some coleslaw, too.
This is classic Sliver contrarianism. Advocating for dry turkey!

But seriously, cooking turkey shouldn't be much harder than cooking a chicken. However, even with general x minutes/pound guidelines and a meat thermometer, the cook times still seems to vary wildly where I am either 1.5 hours early or late, depending on how that dead bird feels like it wants to cook on that day.
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Old 10-11-2022, 11:35 AM   #2996
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Low and slow, baby. That's how you cook a good bird.
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Typical dumb take.
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Old 10-11-2022, 11:35 AM   #2997
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Originally Posted by Sliver View Post
Nah, buns are there for the distraction. I always love seeing people take a bun...yeah, fill up on the cheap stuff you absolute moron.

Juicy turkey is the physical ####s. I deliberately dry mine out a bit. I really don't need avian juices running down my chin...that's nasty. Some nice and dry white meat, mashed potatoes and stuffing with some gravy on top is the best. And some coleslaw, too.
Buns are for the following day...

Turkey buns are best for a Thanksgiving next day snack...
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Old 10-11-2022, 11:44 AM   #2998
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Originally Posted by Fighting Banana Slug View Post
This is classic Sliver contrarianism. Advocating for dry turkey!

But seriously, cooking turkey shouldn't be much harder than cooking a chicken. However, even with general x minutes/pound guidelines and a meat thermometer, the cook times still seems to vary wildly where I am either 1.5 hours early or late, depending on how that dead bird feels like it wants to cook on that day.
Ya, I've definitely had the same size turkey in the same oven take a significantly different amount of time, I think a lot has to do with water content. That's why dinner time is when the turkey is ready. Pretty much every side takes under an hour, so with a 30 min turkey rest/carving time, you can use a thermometer and guess that last half hour to get everything else on the go.
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Old 10-11-2022, 11:46 AM   #2999
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Turkey skin seems like... too thick to me? Or something? Chicken skin is great, but I never eat the turkey skin. Even when crispy it's just kind of gross to me.
It’s thicker and fatter for sure. We have a small dinner so we never do a full bird, just thighs. And the skin is significantly less appetizing than chicken skin.
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Old 10-11-2022, 11:48 AM   #3000
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Turkey is worse chicken. I made a little Thanksgiving dinner just for the wife and kids yesterday so just did a big chicken. Juicy, delicious, didn't take all day to cook. Way better.
You are correct, turkey sucks balls.


We not do a nice citrus Asian inspired pork loin at thanks giving and we have been doing BBA ribs at Christmas for over 15 years, so much better.


Who wants to take any time to make such a ####ty piece of meat.
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