How will you be remembered?

[Maritime Q-Scout]

I find the concept of someone remembering little ole me kind of bizarre. I always thought of myself as someone who kinda fades into the background and no one really gives a second thought to after the fact. I'm always touched to hear "so and so mentioned you were up to ____" regardless of what it is, as well it means they were thinking of me. I find that really humbling (I don't know how much of an ego I can portray on this board, on other's I litterally post as "the Greatest" but it's classic overcompensation, lol).

That said, how do I want to be remebered? I like to think of myself of a man of integrity, honesty, and doing the right thing. Friends look to me when they're in a tough situation or need advice as they know I'll give my perspective regardless if it's positive or not.

I try and help people out whenever I can, I like to think of myself as the guy that says "do you need a hand?" if you mention you're moving. I like to think of myself as the guy that buys you a beer (or beers depending on the situation) when you help him out. I like to think of myself as a sounding board when you're fustrated, and a guy that will try and steer you in the right direction from whatever problem you might have.

I try and be supportive of my friends and family (in the case of my family I might go overboard, especially when it comes to my little brother).

If I was to be remembered for one thing, it's to be a good person. That doesn't mean that I'll always succeed in what I set out to do, or help where I try. But within the wrealm of reason, and ability I try.

I think this is a good question to think about, as it helps give you guidance in the type of person you want to be. A similiar thread might be who are your role models? I try and live up to the person my grandfather was, will I succeed? In my mind, I'll never come close, but it doesn't mean I won't try.

[FireFly]

Originally Posted by Cowperson

As to how I would want to be remembered, I'm on Spitfire's side and I think the best policy is to let everyone else figure that out after you've lived your life the way you've wanted to live it, rather than the way you think people expected you to.

Cowperson

I don't think people expect me to live any way other than that which I do live. I would just like to strive to live how I want to live to the best of my abilities.

[Cowperson]

Originally Posted by FireFly

I don't think people expect me to live any way other than that which I do live. I would just like to strive to live how I want to live to the best of my abilities.

Decades ago, working at a newspaper, I held a man's life in my hands . . . . . a sheet of paper summarizing the life of the retired local fire chief who had just died.

One page.

I remember that moment quite well as I wondered, as a young man, if my life would ever be summarized on MORE than one page, if trumpets would be blaring and professional mourners would be hired with hundreds of cars trailing my hearse.

One page didn't seem like a lot.

Is that important? Maybe then it might have been. Now it isn't.

Cowperson

[FireFly]

Originally Posted by Cowperson

Decades ago, working at a newspaper, I held a man's life in my hands . . . . . a sheet of paper summarizing the life of the retired local fire chief who had just died.

One page.

I remember that moment quite well as I wondered, as a young man, if my life would ever be summarized on MORE than one page, if trumpets would be blaring and professional mourners would be hired with hundreds of cars trailing my hearse.

One page didn't seem like a lot.

Is that important? Maybe then it might have been. Now it isn't.

Cowperson

But that's just one page being presented to the world. I'm sure that his eulogys were more than a page.

When my grandfather passed away there was a small notice in three papers. We were forced to hold two services for him due to the outpouring of support. Those who spoke at each one were different, but all had a similar story of how great he was, of what an inspiration he was... but they all talked for hours.

One page may not be enough, but that man touched hundreds, if not thousands of people just by being. It's not about the peice of paper, it's about the memories people will have of you that will last them a lifetime. I certainly don't want to be the one people say "GOOD!" for when I go...

[mykalberta]

Great thread.

At the moment I probably wouldnt be remember for a whole lot that really matters.

I guess thats why you get married and have kids

MYK

[Bobblehead]

Cowperson - is "How will I be remembered?" really that different of a question than " Dear Lord, help me to be the kind of person my dog thinks I am." ?

Don't they both provoke the same kind of introspection?

And I think Frank's question is a great one, but it really depends upon why you are asking it. If you are wondering it because you are worried about how other people will think of you then perhaps that is a bit misguided. It is you rlife, not theirs. If you are asking it because you are assessing your own life from a different perspective, then that is wonderful because it means you are willing to test yourself and measure youself.
Same question, different reasons for asking it.

[Frank the Tank]

I guess for the three of us sitting there, the moment was impactful because the question forced you to take stock in who you are and what you have done. It isn't someting that will change how I live my life, because I am not going to fish for kind words or change how I am so people will talk nicely about me when I die. Some people hate me, and I'm fine with that. It just made us stop and think.

Here was this guy who passed away, and A LOT of people felt the same way we did. His life easily could have gone the way mine did, and Mike's did, and Rob's did. But it didn't. Very surreal experience.

[Eastern Girl]

Originally Posted by Maritime Q-Scout

I find the concept of someone remembering little ole me kind of bizarre. I always thought of myself as someone who kinda fades into the background and no one really gives a second thought to after the fact. I'm always touched to hear "so and so mentioned you were up to ____" regardless of what it is, as well it means they were thinking of me. I find that really humbling (I don't know how much of an ego I can portray on this board, on other's I litterally post as "the Greatest" but it's classic overcompensation, lol).

I am the same way. I am cripplingly shy for the most part, so I assume that I am one that you won't really notice and/or remember at a party or what not. It always shocks me when I am introduced to someone and they remember me weeks or months later.

As for how I would like to be remembered if I had the choice, I would say I would want to be remembered as loyal, the person that everyone counted on and trusted to help them out and support them through thick and thin. But as others have said, it's up to those who knew me or met me to decide how I will be remembered.

[Dion]

Originally Posted by FireFly

But that's just one page being presented to the world. I'm sure that his eulogys were more than a page.

When my grandfather passed away there was a small notice in three papers. We were forced to hold two services for him due to the outpouring of support. Those who spoke at each one were different, but all had a similar story of how great he was, of what an inspiration he was... but they all talked for hours.

One page may not be enough, but that man touched hundreds, if not thousands of people just by being. It's not about the peice of paper, it's about the memories people will have of you that will last them a lifetime. I certainly don't want to be the one people say "GOOD!" for when I go...

When my father passed away in 2000, people were standing in the hallway of the funeral home due to a lack of seats. People we didn't know were showing up to show their respects for my father. It was surreal.

[Maritime Q-Scout]

Originally Posted by Eastern Girl

I am the same way. I am cripplingly shy for the most part, so I assume that I am one that you won't really notice and/or remember at a party or what not. It always shocks me when I am introduced to someone and they remember me weeks or months later.

exactly,

I'm not saying I regret anything I did in high school, but I wish I was more outgoing from the onset. I never really went to parties or hung out on the weekends, as I'd wait to be directly invited first in fear of crashing the party, or showing up when I wasn't wanted.

It's a mindset I've gotten out of (for better or worse, lol). I know what it's like to be cripplingly shy, and it sucks.

So now, when I meet someone, or soemone remembers me from a random drunken night, or at a party, or even through a casual dealing with them at work, I'm suprised, shocked, and humbled.

I guess it just goes to show you never know who remembers you, so always be on your best behaviour

[Ford Prefect]

I'd like to be remembered as someone who tried to do what was right even if it meant going against the grain of popular opinion, a free thinker, broad minded, a positive example for my kids and any future grandkids, and someone who helped out in the community. Due to the nature of my work, I'd hope to be remembered as someone who helped foster and develop the profession of paramedicine in Canada.

I'll probably be remembered as an outspoken, saracastic, anti-establishment jerk who shot his mouth off too much.

[Reggie Dunlop]

Originally Posted by Cowperson

A few years after High School ended, I learned one guy in our class had died in a roll-over and the very first thing that came spontaneously into my head on hearing the news was "GOOD!!"

That shocking thought caused a little bit of introspection on my part but even after all that, I still couldn't help thinking "GOOD!!" And I still think "GOOD!!" today as well.

The guy was a chronic, violent bully to everyone around him and the planet was far better off without him for sure.

I knew a feller like that too. Sorta. He was violent and stupid. Mostly stupid from whence the violence sprang moreso than the bullying. You have to have a certain amount of your wits about you in order to be an effective bully methinks.

Stole my brother's bike but assumed that it would have no bearing on my relationship to him, because afterall, he didn't steal my bike. Like I said, stupid.

Petty Stupid. As far as his life experience went, it was normal to have close relatives serving time.

Nonetheless, this chap was born a punk, lived a punk's life and died a punk. Found dead in the parking lot of the Cecil Hotel with the ignominious distinction of having his shoes stolen posthumously.

I know you shouldn't speak ill of the those who have left this Mortal Coil, but in this case I'm guilty.

[Mightyfire89]

I think I'd like to be remembered as someone who had many flaws, but if a friend was in trouble, could be counted on to help...no matter what.

I believe strongly in the concept of karma...and strive to always treat my fellow person as I'd like to be treated...though I can be brought off track by especially loathsome people.

I'm also a degenerate gambler and a horrible drunk...so, karmically (word?) speaking, I don't know what that's gonna mean for me...;-)

Great story and great thread, Tank.

Oh, and Cow, I know exactly what you're talking about...about a year and a half ago I learned of the death of a guy I used to know from impaired driving (he was drunk, and drove into a telephone pole, which apparently took off his head), and about all I had to say was "Well, you wanna be an a-hole your whole life, that's what you get".

[OILFAN #81]

Someone who is/was there for you no matter what, through thick and thin. Someone who can be counted on no matter what the situation was to do the best he could possibly do. Finally, someone who was sincere, honest, trustworthy and overall a good person.

Basically........they'd look at me and say:

That guy came out for all the guys who wanted to be him.....

and for all the ladies who came to see him.........


Honestly though i've lost enough people over the years and you never know when your time is to go. I do my best everyday to be a good person and if I pass away tomorrow, well then I can go knowing that I am exactly that. I'd just want the people who knew me to say "I was honored to be his friend/family member" because the people I respect the most in my life right now, I feel that way about them and it makes me smile knowing people like that.

[Vulcan]

Others have mentioned it and for me it's far more important in how I feel about myself when I reach that final breath than how others will think of me. I hope to be at peace. I didn't always feel this way. In my teen years, I seemed to lose my sense of self and cared too much what others thought even in my rebellion. Maybe I'll have a nice funeral or not and maybe those who want can greave but at that point it won't matter to me.