Quitting Drinking

[Yamer]

I'm not in the danger areas so commonly associated with addiction, but I've been very uncomfortable with how my consumption of alcohol has affected my overall health (mental and physical) over the last number of years. The COVID-19 pandemic has exasperated my consumption and also magnified my own reflection on just how much I drink, and to what extent. Often times I fill the boredom and uncertainty with drink, and frankly I just don't want to do that anymore. I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired.

I've decided that I want to reduce my alcohol intake to the point that I would be very happy to quit drinking altogether. Whenever I have extended breaks from alcohol I feel so much better, but then I fall back into it when I'm bored or frustrated. I've quit smoking, so it's doubly upsetting that I can't switch this off in the same way.

Can we talk about quitting drinking?

[OldDutch]

Its hard. Especially if it’s generally non destructive. If your addicted to meth the damage is obvious and unavoidable. Alcohol as long as you show up to work on time, are generally helpful with the family, and don’t cause a scene drinking you can get away with it for a long time.

Good for you for quitting or reducing. I am trying that. Your not alone. Its hard. In the winter its to get through it. A nice meal is complete with wine. In the summer its so relaxing. There never is a good time to stop it seems if your not causing obvious issues.

Anyways, good luck. Although I have no good advice I am there too. My big help was not drinking with dinner and having a drink occasionally before bed. That way I am not just drinking all evening.

[flylock shox]

Four bits of advice for people who want to reduce - but not eliminate - their drinking.


First, only drink socially: never alone.


Second, drink high quality things you like the taste of, not crappy things that you can slam back just to get drunk (i.e. quality over quantity).


Third, never do shots or shooters.



Fourth, if you think you have a problem, you're probably right.



Of course, I say this as I sit alone with a nice ale I picked up a few days ago, so what do I know.

[Wastedyouth]

Start with 30 days. When my relationship gets poor with it, that's what I do. Usually once or twice a year.

It's a place to start. See how you feel after that.

But choose something to fill your evenings. Something that gets you out of your house.

Or you'll get bored and it'll get hard.

[Cecil Terwilliger]

I didn’t like how much I was consuming so I stopped drinking. It was never meant to be permanent. That was in October 2014. I didn’t like what drinking was doing to my health or the hangovers. Also helped me quit smoking as the two often go hand in hand. My bank account is happier, my beer belly went away and it had no effect on me socially. Plus zero alcohol beer is gaining popularity so there are some decent options available.

As soon as they invent Star Trek style synthetic scotch, I’ll be a happy camper.

[Johnny199r]

I haven't drank for maybe 8 years. Absolutely nothing positive comes from it. It costs a lot, makes people fat, makes them act like idiots, gives hangovers the next day etc

Your life will be better without alcohol.

[Regular_John]

I’m coming up on two years dry in about a month’s time, I’ve shared before the why behind this change in the past, but ultimately it made me feel like crap. So for now let’s focus on the techniques & key changes that worked for me.

I’d say in the 1 year period before my last drink I’d fallen into pattern that included moderately drinking for 6-8 weeks, feeling like garbage, going 2-3 weeks without it, before returning to a month or so of moderate drinking. Although I wasn’t necessarily trying to quit at the time, I was habitually giving myself breaks, but ultimately choosing to start again because a lot of it was quite enjoyable.

One night I was out for dinner with my wife during one of my dry periods when I ordered a club soda and my wife said to me “You know what you are? You’re sober curious.”

I’d never heard the term before but damned if it didn’t slam the pieces together for me. There’s a ton books and articles about the Sober Curious movement, but the basic premise is that you’re not giving up booze, you’re not trying to follow arbitrary rules about about where and when you can drink, but you are actively being selective about it.

In short, it takes away the “all or nothing” mentality and really refocuses your effort on the decisions you are making. In my case it was about giving myself permission not to drink… which as silly as it seems, I needed.

So when I discovered the term, I started researching it, and other sobriety communities, I also came across a few podcast on the topic, in particular I found Seltzer Squad was key in helping me over that 3 week hump.

Just hearing people around my own age banter back & forth about their alcohol follies, while acknowledging that hangovers really do suck was exactly what I needed. At it’s core alcohol is just one of the millions of consumer products out there, we don’t have to purchase or consume if we don’t want to, we can still have fulfilling lives without it, in the same way you can have a fulfilling life without purchasing celery or turnips.

[Igottago]

I've been toying with the idea of quitting. I just don't feel like its really necessary or enjoyable for me anymore. My youthful party days are behind me and I've realized there was far too much time wasted on drinking, I don't really have any desire to negatively impact my health with it nor have it impact my limited and valuable time outside of work. I have a deep desire to maintain clarity and focus right now so I've already drastically reduced my consumption over the last few months.
I do have a harder time saying no when I'm in social situation, and virtually all of my friends circles are drinkers. That will be the hardest place to stay disciplined and say no more often. I haven't made any major declarations like I'm never drinking again, but it does feel like its something that's on its way out of my life and just doesn't have a place of significance like it did for so many years.

[Winsor_Pilates]

I've done a dry first quarter (Jan-March) the last 3 years.
Every time I do it, I feel amazing, lose 15-20 pounds, kick ass in my job(financially) and contemplate if I'm getting to the point where that's just to be my new norm (optimal norm at that).

I don't drink that much and don't have any drinking issues in the general sense, but like the OP I often question if I really need it.
I can honestly see a day in the next few years where I call it off on a more permanent basis.

I recommend looking into some books on the topic.
Out society has us wired to think drinking is normal (and cool) and quitting is the actual abnormality; when reality is drinking is the choice.
If you are thinking of quitting, or reducing, or taking a break; re wiring how you think about drinking is a good place to start.
Allen Carr books are supposed to be really good.

PS; I'm drinking wine right now

[KelVarnsen]

I was a heavy drinker for years but I hit rock bottom 2 years ago. I haven’t had a drink since then.

Best choice I’ve ever made

[afc wimbledon]

first step get everything out of your house, throw it or give it away,

[PaperBagger'14]

Originally Posted by afc wimbledon

first step get everything out of your house, throw it or give it away,

100% this, if you are done with something, get it out of your life/access.

[Winsor_Pilates]

I really enjoy non alcoholic beer now as well.
Partake in particular is good and very low calorie: drinkpartake.com/

Sometime I just want that nice cold beer while watching a hockey game, grilling on the bbq or after a round of golf.
I came to realize it wasn't actually the alcohol I was craving, it was the association I have with the cold beer to relaxation and enjoyment of these moments.

They're also great in situations where everyone is drinking and you want something in hand to avoid that "why aren't you drinking" conversation.

[Harry Lime]

It always amazes me how many people drink absolute crap. Any time that I've talked someone into investing in a better bottle, their consumption goes way down. It's not about the expenditure, most times you actually spend less on getting something good and then drinking less of it. It's more about enjoying the taste and texture of the product. Moving away from getting wasted being the goal is a big change.

I haven't been drunk in years. I do drink tasty beverages, and rarely even get to the 'buzz' stage. The initial calming effect, and enjoying a complex wine, whiskey or gin is not a bad place to be.

[Snuffleupagus]

Originally Posted by afc wimbledon

first step get everything out of your house, throw it or give it away,

My son was helping a friend fix his neighbours fence that someone had slid into and as they were packing up the owner came out and said "hey guys,great job I have a tip for you in the garage. 3 boxes of booze, everything from rye to tequila. some weren't totally full but about $800.00 worth.

Was that you?

[rbochan]

Originally Posted by Yamer

...Can we talk about quitting drinking?

I can 't speak for anyone else, but I used to put a considerable amount of time, effort, and expense into drinking. In my case, I found that I had to put at least, _if not more_ time, effort, and expense into actively NOT drinking. I had to find something to fill that time, be it fishing, gardening, golf, guitar, a beat up old car, or whatever. When I first stopped, I was going to 2 or 3 meetings a day, just because I didn't know wtf else to do.

Don't be afraid to ask for help. I found that to be the most difficult thing. I've lived my whole life with no help from anyone else. Going it alone is tough. There's a "Big Book" that can go along way of helping too, along with a huge community of people willing to help.

If you're serious, you can do it. You just have to do the work.

Best of luck, don't ever be afraid to ask for advice.

[CliffFletcher]

Originally Posted by flylock shox

Four bits of advice for people who want to reduce - but not eliminate - their drinking.


First, only drink socially: never alone.

Of course you can get into trouble drinking socially. But the trend in North America in recent decades towards drinking alone is not a good one. What benefits alcohol provides are pretty much only evident is social situations.

The social context of drinking turns out to matter quite a lot to how alcohol affects us psychologically. Although we tend to think of alcohol as reducing anxiety, it doesn’t do so uniformly. As Michael Sayette, a leading alcohol researcher at the University of Pittsburgh, recently told me, if you packaged alcohol as an anti-anxiety serum and submitted it to the FDA, it would never be approved. He and his onetime graduate student Kasey Creswell, a Carnegie Mellon professor who studies solitary drinking, have come to believe that one key to understanding drinking’s uneven effects may be the presence of other people. Having combed through decades’ worth of literature, Creswell reports that in the rare experiments that have compared social and solitary alcohol use, drinking with others tends to spark joy and even euphoria, while drinking alone elicits neither—if anything, solo drinkers get more depressed as they drink...

https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine...roblem/619017/

[Cecil Terwilliger]

Originally Posted by Winsor_Pilates

I really enjoy non alcoholic beer now as well.
Partake in particular is good and very low calorie: drinkpartake.com/

Sometime I just want that nice cold beer while watching a hockey game, grilling on the bbq or after a round of golf.
I came to realize it wasn't actually the alcohol I was craving, it was the association I have with the cold beer to relaxation and enjoyment of these moments.

They're also great in situations where everyone is drinking and you want something in hand to avoid that "why aren't you drinking" conversation.

Partake is definitely the best of the non alcoholic beer options.

[flylock shox]

Clausthaler - and particularly Clausthaler amber (I think now marketed as "dry-hopped") - is another excellent non-alcoholic beer.



Nice to have on hand for days where you feel like a beer, but not getting drunk. Scratches that sunny weekend afternoon itch.

[GirlySports]

Never drink alone and get everything out of your house are really good ones.
Only drink when around people, that way you are socially aware and the drinking isn't the main event, you're busy eating, talking and listening.


What about drinking non-alcoholic beer? Does that help? Never tried.