Hitting on Women Thread v2.0

[RoadGame]

Originally Posted by Sowa

See there it is. I used to be that guy "the good friend", but then I blended some cocky *******ness into my routine with girls and I actually got girlfriends. I am a nice guy but in order to keep her interested you can't be a nice guy all the time or she's just going to walk all over you...

I sympathize tremendously with Wookie and Sowa, though I tried and failed at the *******ness bit. It just didn't feel natural at all, and I always seemed off-key instead of edgy and interesting. Anyways, I wish I knew where all those girls who want the nice guys are hiding, because I inevitably meet the ones who like the idea in principle but aren't looking for that themselves.

Argh.

Good luck Wookie! My advice - get it sorted in your head where you don't care if she says no, then walk up to her confidently, look her in the eyes and say something like "you know, I've been coming to this pool for a while now and I would like to get to know you better, how about going for a coffee sometime?" My batting average is total crap, but at least that way you won't have to beat yourself up for using some awful line on her or arriving at your question obliquely.

RG

[Eastern Girl]

Originally Posted by Mango

I don't know what to say. Women aren't all the same. Some us actually appreciate the good ones, because they don't come around that often.

*shrug*

I am with you. I don't like the cocky guys. I can appreciate a guy with confidence, but I find a lot of the time, guys get carried away and they cross the line into cockiness. It's a complete turn off for me. But I have some friends that love the cocky jerk type guy... for some reason...

[Wookie]

Originally Posted by Eastern Girl

I am with you. I don't like the cocky guys. I can appreciate a guy with confidence, but I find a lot of the time, guys get carried away and they cross the line into cockiness. It's a complete turn off for me. But I have some friends that love the cocky jerk type guy... for some reason...

Asking out a girl while wearing skin tight trunks

[D to the iddy]

What if there isn't the casual talk yet? I'm in the semi-same boat where I see the girl a bit but still haven't talked to her... Any suggestions?

[SpitFire40]

Originally Posted by Buff

I could've sworn that you had previously said that you were married.

Nope, probably the furthest from it at the moment. Just happy being a single dude until the right one comes across my path.

[Eastern Girl]

Originally Posted by Wookie

Asking out a girl while wearing skin tight trunks

Ha, yeah, that's pretty confident, and it has the added of benefit of allowing her to check out what you're workin' with...

[Buff]

Originally Posted by Wookie

Asking out a girl while wearing skin tight trunks

If that worries you then change into your clothes, then go back out to the pool area if you can and say something like. "I was thinking, you know what would be fun? If we went out for <insert activity of your preference here>. Would you like to?" That "line" worked for me everytime I used it.

[Wookie]

Originally Posted by Buff

If that worries you then change into your clothes, then go back out to the pool area if you can and say something like. "I was thinking, you know what would be fun? If we went out for <insert activity of your preference here>. Would you like to?" That "line" worked for me everytime I used it.

hehehe, I was kidding, I've only ever spoken to people @ the pool in my trunks, not worried about wearing them

[Wookie]

Originally Posted by D to the iddy

What if there isn't the casual talk yet? I'm in the semi-same boat where I see the girl a bit but still haven't talked to her... Any suggestions?

Hmmm, that's probably even more difficult.

That's kind of what I brought up earlier with my reference to the gym. In my situation I have no problem during mid conversation to say, "hey wanna go out sometime," and then just continuing on with whatever is said.. However going up and talking to someone out of the blue, hmm..

I think just saying hi is the first best step.

See how they react, it's a good gauge on what they're like. If they respond or just brush it off, but make sure it's an actual hi, rather then some awkward, hi, that they might not hear, then you keep walking and think... dammit, I'm a knob..

Any other suggestions?

I think lines are kinda lame.. Normal conversation is probably your best best. You're not going to come up with something that will wow someone in one line, unless you're really really funny.. and then you have to hope that they get it or even have a sense of humor.

[CaptainCrunch]

My advice, just freaking ask. Don't ask her for a mid day coffee, or lunch, ask her out on a for real date, other wise your going to get your signals crossed and she's going to make you a friend without any kind of benefits.

Whats the worst that can happen, she says no? So slaps you? sprays lighter fluid in your face and throws a lit match at you. They all heal, well sort of. But the only way that your going to know if she feels in anyway the same as you feel about her is to ask her. don't change your appearance, if your a jeans and T-shirt person, don't show up in a white leisure suit with big chains. The oldest and cheesiest advice is the best advice, just be you, with a bannana stuffed down your pants. When you ask her out, if she says yes, make sure you have a plan in place, a parachute, and a duck whistle. It'll all be good.

[CaptainCrunch]

Originally Posted by Mango

Not usually. I would much rather prefer a honest and sincere guy. I find cocky guys to be very unattractive. You have no idea how much it means to find a guy who'll listen to you and just wants to get to know you.

Smile and be sincere. I won't speak for all the women, but I prefer a guy who wants to get to know me first and perhaps the relationship will progess. Something like grabbing some coffee or a quick bite to eat. Talk and get to know her. You have nothing to lose. If things don't work out romantically, you'll have a good friend and honestly, there's nothing wrong with that.

Its kinda weird, but I can never be friends with a girl that I have or had a romantic interest in, it never works out, there's awkward feelings and the girls that I've tried to stay friends with always use that friendship and those old romantic feelings as a weapon to be used when they're bored or need money.

Thats why I love the line "Please tell me that we can still be friends" I always laugh at that as I'm packing up my spider man action figures and taking my star wars models down from the ceiling.

Or the cruncher line "Your like a brother to me" which I reply with a mumble about being born in Alabama and asking if I can be that weird step brother like the kid on the brady bunch who was always eyeing up his hot step sister.

Hmmm, now that I think about it, I've chased off more girls then I know what to do with.

[jar_e]

Originally Posted by CaptainCrunch

Whats the worst that can happen, she says no? So slaps you? sprays lighter fluid in your face and throws a lit match at you. They all heal, well sort of.

Not a word of a lie, I had a friend who was pushed off a second story balcony after he asked a girl out...so just stay away from high places

[Wookie]

Originally Posted by CaptainCrunch

My advice, just freaking ask. Don't ask her for a mid day coffee, or lunch, ask her out on a for real date, other wise your going to get your signals crossed and she's going to make you a friend without any kind of benefits.

Whats the worst that can happen, she says no? So slaps you? sprays lighter fluid in your face and throws a lit match at you. They all heal, well sort of. But the only way that your going to know if she feels in anyway the same as you feel about her is to ask her. don't change your appearance, if your a jeans and T-shirt person, don't show up in a white leisure suit with big chains. The oldest and cheesiest advice is the best advice, just be you, with a bannana stuffed down your pants. When you ask her out, if she says yes, make sure you have a plan in place, a parachute, and a duck whistle. It'll all be good.

GRRRR

Don't have an issue with doing it, or what to wear. or how to ask, or what to do. I'm not big on the coffee, lunch, etc. A date's a date, at night, with food, and then whatever else.

It was all about the work scenario, which, I wasn't going to get around anyway, so, was kind of a non-issue, but was curious if it was inappropriate.

Regardless, all good advice

Especially the banana

[Blaster86]

My girlfriend is pretty good at it =D

[J pold]

What an awesome thread! The off topic has been lacking for awhile good to see something interesting

Haha don’t take my advice I am pretty awful at asking girls out, in fact the first girl I asked on a date since I broke up with my girl friend (which was like a year ago) was this Saturday to go to the Flames game, alas she “had to work”…so I don’t really have any advice

But if she does say no don’t worry, Chicks are for Fags!

[RoadGame]

Ok Wookie, so when's D-Day?

[Wookie]

Originally Posted by RoadGame

Ok Wookie, so when's D-Day?

Next time I speak to her, could be a week or so, obviously I have to be at the pool at the same time again. Which usually happens once or twice a week.

I can't swim tomorrow, maybe can swim Wednesday, Thursday or Friday. Although one of those three I have to do something else..

[Wookie]

Originally Posted by CaptainCrunch

Its kinda weird, but I can never be friends with a girl that I have or had a romantic interest in, it never works out, there's awkward feelings and the girls that I've tried to stay friends with always use that friendship and those old romantic feelings as a weapon to be used when they're bored or need money.

Thats why I love the line "Please tell me that we can still be friends" I always laugh at that as I'm packing up my spider man action figures and taking my star wars models down from the ceiling.

Or the cruncher line "Your like a brother to me" which I reply with a mumble about being born in Alabama and asking if I can be that weird step brother like the kid on the brady bunch who was always eyeing up his hot step sister.

Hmmm, now that I think about it, I've chased off more girls then I know what to do with.

Yeah, usually the friendship thing is a waste and just fizzles, I've kept good friends with a few, but if it does't work out, usually it's for a reason, and that same reason is often a reason I wouldn't be friends with a person either.

Similar situation recently. Something didn't work out, we talked about hanging out, it all sounded good, buuuut, when I think about it, probably not, I don't want to be around her in a social setting, she probably feels the same way..

Hehe, I've definitly chased off a few women in my day too.. HAHA, some of them make me laugh. ah the things I've done....

[J pold]

Originally Posted by Wookie

Don't have an issue with doing it, or what to wear. or how to ask, or what to do. I'm not big on the coffee, lunch, etc. A date's a date, at night, with food, and then whatever else.

Nice….

Now if she is a lifeguard this is the best advice I can give you

“And ever summer there she is Lotioning, Oiling, Oiling, Lotioning, I CAN’T TAKE THIS NO MORE!!”

[Wookie]

Originally Posted by J pold

Nice….

Now if she is a lifeguard this is the best advice I can give you

“And ever summer there she is Lotioning, Oiling, Oiling, Lotioning, I CAN’T TAKE THIS NO MORE!!”

Great movie! Forgot about that show.

Flames tickets are always a great asset for asking out, girls seem to usually like going, you can talk, and sit and not talk for awhile too, all of which is pretty easy.

The walk to and from the car and the car ride is good conversation time. And you can always have a drink or a few, to get comfortable if that helps.