So..whats your best advice on parenthood

[WilsonFourTwo]

First off - congrats!

My advice is always the same.....Your kid doesn't care about the presents you've bought, they just want your time. You don't have to work a bazillion hours to provide all the finer things in life. Support your family, then spoil them with your time and attention. Pretty simple recipe for success.

[MoneyGuy]

Discipline your kids, damn it. I hate it when kids clearly have no rules, or when rules are never enforced ("if you don't stop that we are leaving the store," but neither happens).

Kids aren't naturally bad; they're naturally good. Bad parents create bad kids.

When my kids were young, they knew that what I said would happen. If I said I'd turn the car around, I turned it around. I never failed to do what I said I would. My kids are now great young adults with values and respect for others.

And, enjoy the roller coaster ride of emotions. Some days you'll wonder if it's worth it, but it's the greatest thing you'll ever do.

[V]

Haha, earlier this month I was at the swimming pool with my kids and this guy was trying to get his ~5 & 7 year old girls out of the pool. He was getting frustrated that they wouldn't listen so he told them "If you don't get out of the pool this instant there's not going to be any Christmas this year! No Santa, no presents, no tree, nothing!". I don't generally like to make fun of other parents, because it's a brutal job sometimes, but that one was hilarious. How do your kids take you seriously when you threaten them with stuff like that?

[The Goon]

Every so often, you will catch yourself saying something like, "What's going on, Mr. Poopy Paloopy?"

When that happens, just shake it off and move on.

[Barnet Flame]

Congrats - and my best advice?

Get a free kitten from JaromeScore=MeGusta.

[metallicat]

Avoid it.



Edit - that is coming from a non-parent.

[Russic]

Congrats!

My advice:
- Everybody will give you advice and everybody thinks their way is the best (myself included, I think I'm awesome). This is generally unavoidable. Practice your polite smile and head nod.

- Debating parenting styles is not unlike debating religion, the only result will be anger and frustration. Parent your kid in a way that makes sense to you and makes you comfortable and don't offer advice unless asked. If somebody gets in your face about how you do things it's probably best to just abandon ship. The situation will rarely get more pleasant once that ball starts rolling.

- Don't let yourself or your wife get swept up in the baby olympics. If your kid isn't using full sentences by the end of year 1 they aren't handicapped (but everybody will insinuate that they are). All kids walk, talk and use the toilet... when they get there isn't terribly important.

- Following the advice of the non-parents in this thread and not discussing your kid will be surprisingly difficult. Life does a 180 on you with kids and talking about anything else actually becomes a chore because you aren't focused on much else. Do keep it in mind though and catch yourself when you start to babble (I babble, so I know).

- Your child sleeping will become a HUGE focus of many conversations. Many parents compare notes on this and opinions can get heated. I've been flat-out told to my face that our method of helping our kid sleep will turn him into a sociopath. It's impossible in my opinion to be void of judgement when talking with other parents, but keep hurtful comments like that to yourself.

- The first 2-3 months are a serious system shock. Don't let it freak you out too much, just endure it. Things get easier imo.

- Routine is awesome and your kid will respond well to it. You'll break routine for social engagements (BBQ's, parties, weddings etc.) and your kid might become the worst nightmare you can imagine for a day or two. That's the trade-off. For this reason I generally only attend BBQ's that have fireworks and/or strippers, otherwise they probably aren't worth it (your friends without kids will make fun of you for being a hermit).

[ah123]

Congrats!!! Russic's post above nails the big things.

The only thing I can add is to enjoy the ride, having kids really adds depth to your world

[EVERLAST]

show them how you respect others....be kind, honest and considerate to all in their presence. If they see this they will have all the things they need to be successful.
Tell them to do whats right and show them while their growing ....one day they will make you proud when they in return do the right things in all of the good and bad things in life.

Never enable them however to make poor decisions .....boundaries with kids will teach them how to be tolerate of others and make the right decisions for themselves.

Teach them to take care of themselves....nobody else will <<<<best advice Ive ever gotten.

Kids nowadays have NO manners, show zero respect towards anything and its a direct result of observing their parents who obviously did none of the above.

[CaptainCrunch]

15 years and 8 month until he/she wrecks your car

[troutman]

Bob: It gets a whole lot more complicated when you have kids.
Charlotte: It's scary.
Bob: The most terrifying day of your life is the day the first one is born.
Charlotte: Nobody ever tells you that.
Bob: Your life, as you know it... is gone. Never to return. But they learn how to walk, and they learn how to talk... and you want to be with them. And they turn out to be the most delightful people you will ever meet in your life.
Charlotte: That's nice.

[Lost In Translation]

[Regulator75]

I've been a first time Father for 3 months now and I cannot believe how fast everything is going by.

I'm really trying to appreciate the little things we can do before he gets too big. Sleeping on me, easily carrying him everywhere, laying on me as we watch the hockey game, him holding my finger and so much more.

Take pictures, lots of pictures.

In three shorts months I've taken roughly 3,000 pics or 25 GB of my little man.

[afc wimbledon]

As a foster parent and parent I think what serves me the best, and this is dealing with seriously effed up kids as well as my own, is that what you do is far more important than what you try to 'teach', want an honest kid then be honest in front of him, give back the extra change some poor kid at McDicks gave you by mistake, fess up to speeding when you get stopped etc, want a polite kid then open doors for people give up your seat on a train, want a kid that reads then read yourself.

Whatever they see you do or hear you say, everyday, all the time, teaches them, even if you don't want it to.

[freedogger]

Play with your kids at every age. Don't be too much of an adult that you are above this. It really helps establish bonds that make discipline and correction easier and more effective.

[GGG]

Dont change your life and become a hermit.

Every activity you do now can be done with some modification. You just have to be willing to put in the effort. Many people have a kid and become slaves to their childs routine. They have to be home by seven for their kid to sleep. They have to do the same way and end up sacrificing everything in their old life for the new one.

You dont have to do this you just have to plan a little better. Teach your kid to sleep with noise around. Teach them to sleep in a playpen. Go out and have fun especially the first year when you can just strap them on to you. Dont make them or yourselves slaves to a schedule.

If you did it before you had kids you can do it now with your kids if you want to

[freedogger]

Originally Posted by Regulator75

I've been a first time Father for 3 months now and I cannot believe how fast everything is going by.

I'm really trying to appreciate the little things we can do before he gets too big. Sleeping on me, easily carrying him everywhere, laying on me as we watch the hockey game, him holding my finger and so much more.

Take pictures, lots of pictures.

In three shorts months I've taken roughly 3,000 pics or 25 GB of my little man.

Yep, and make sure you fill in all the meta data for each one and label the file names descriptively too.

[The Goon]

These are hilarious yet good pieces of advice:

http://www.c00lstuff.com/1133/Do_s_a...s_with_babies/

For example,

[prarieboy]

Buy used Baby gear (except for car seats). You'll save a fortune and can find a ton of it from parents a little ahead of you in the game.

Get a good quality light weight stroller. The massive ones that barely fit in the trunk are fine for some things but the fold up umbrella types work great 90% of the time and are way easier to deal with.

There's been a ton of good info posted in this thread I won't bother repeating. I will mention that I waited for years to have kids. I can honestly say it's the best thing I've done in my life so far.

Congratulations to you!

[Coys1882]

I've seen it at least once in here but it's all about routine, routine, routine.

[Barnet Flame]

Originally Posted by Coys1882

I've seen it at least once in here but it's all about poutine, poutine, poutine.

Good advice.