03-03-2011, 04:19 PM
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#41
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First Line Centre
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Toronto
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After each pause for laughter say ....
Yeah, that's what I'M talking abooot.
__________________
I like to quote myself - scotty2hotty
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03-03-2011, 04:48 PM
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#42
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Voted for Kodos
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Make fun of them for wearing shoes around in their houses.
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03-03-2011, 05:00 PM
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#43
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Tampa, Florida
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eh..
__________________
Thank you for everything CP. Good memories and thankful for everything that has been done to help me out. I will no longer take part on these boards. Take care, Go Flames Go.
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03-03-2011, 05:34 PM
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#44
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Powerplay Quarterback
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Vancouver
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Zed not Zee. Creek not Crick. Roof not ruff.
Throw the mic on the floor and walk away.
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03-03-2011, 05:52 PM
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#45
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: H-Town, Texas
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CaptainCrunch
Compare football
4 downs to make 10 yards, really
We have bigger fields and an extra guy on each team to drive the snowplow
State the below in an NFL Films deep voice
We have hockey, a tough physical sport where you try to put a few ounces of frozen vulcanized rubber into a tiny net defended by an armoured tank by shooting this object at speeds of over 100 miles an hour. Meanwhile the players need to maneuver sharply on ice while wearing sharpened blades on their feet.
Then switch to a high pitched lyspe (sp?)
American's have basketball (A sport invented by Canadians who couldn't play hockey and then promptly ignored by the rest of us) a game where perfectly coiffed thin tall men jog up and down a court wearing fabulous shorts with the intent of throwing a ball through a hoop while playing man to man coverage. In fact, one of your best pure players is you guessed it Canadian.
And in History, America is famous for invasions of its soil, the biggest one being the beatles, but the one that you'd like to forget, the Canadian Invasion, the first one took place in 1812 when Canadians got drunk after a hockey game and made a road trip to the States and burned down the white house. The second invasion is ongoing duh duh daaa.
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I think you should just go make the speech for me!  Awesome..
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03-03-2011, 05:54 PM
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#46
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: H-Town, Texas
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Quote:
Originally Posted by You Need a Thneed
Make fun of them for wearing shoes around in their houses.
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Haaaaaaaaaa how true! When my parents first came to visit my in-laws we were living in Colorado, and they walked in their house and immediately took off their shoes. My in-laws thought it was really odd and commented on it after they went back to Canada. Great point!
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03-03-2011, 06:57 PM
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#47
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Not a casual user
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: A simple man leading a complicated life....
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The National Short-Sleeved Shirt Association says:
Support your right to bare arms!
What do you call an American drawing?
A Yankee Doodle.
__________________
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03-03-2011, 08:50 PM
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#48
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First Line Centre
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Portland, OR
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Quote:
Originally Posted by zuluking
By a show of hands, how many of you have been waiting months for 'x' surgery / MRI / etc.?
If you're American, you don't understand this question.
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That's funny, I have to wait 2 months for my son to see a specialist, and that is with our primary care doc calling in a favor...
PLUS, I get to look forward to a bill. Best of both worlds! Yay America!
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03-03-2011, 09:18 PM
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#49
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Franchise Player
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Also, we kicked their ass in 1812. Just sayin...
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03-04-2011, 07:48 AM
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#50
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Crash and Bang Winger
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ya remember when we burnt down the White House? good times...
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03-04-2011, 08:36 AM
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#51
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First Line Centre
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Mostly applies if your the hunter/fisher kinda guy but......
What did the cowboy say to the American
hunter??
Okay okay it's your deer just let me get my saddle off of it.
*insert cricket noise*
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03-04-2011, 08:42 AM
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#52
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Franchise Player
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I forget who said this and may quote it incorrectly...
"Americans are innocently ignorant about Canada whereas,
Canadians are malevolently well-informed about America."
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03-04-2011, 08:49 AM
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#53
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Franchise Player
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Another. Again don't remember who said it. A British guy.
"There is no discernible difference between Americans and Canadians.
To find the difference: tell a Canadian there is no difference."
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03-04-2011, 08:59 AM
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#54
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GOAT!
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Just tell them our balls are bigger.
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03-04-2011, 09:20 AM
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#55
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First Line Centre
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Toronto
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From unknown author:
"The History of Canada centres around 3 things: Keeping the French in, the Americans out, and the Aboriginals invisible."
__________________
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03-04-2011, 10:08 AM
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#56
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One of the Nine
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Space Sector 2814
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After they anounce your name or whatever wait a few seconds to go up to the front.. then say "Oh sorry I am late.. now you know how you looked to the rest of the world during WW2."
Baaaam.
__________________
"In brightest day, in blackest night / No evil shall escape my sight / Let those who worship evil's might / Beware my power, Green Lantern's light!"
Last edited by GreenLantern; 03-04-2011 at 10:11 AM.
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03-04-2011, 10:20 AM
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#57
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Norm!
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Thats actually pretty brilliant.
I have a book from university called World History from an American perspective.
America has never lost a war, Vietnam doesn't count because it was a tie.
I need to pull that book out and read it again.
__________________
My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings;
Look on my Works, ye Mighty, and despair!
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03-04-2011, 11:11 AM
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#58
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Franchise Player
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Whats the difference between an Yankee and a Quickee...
One you do by yourself.....
__________________
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03-04-2011, 11:35 AM
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#59
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First Line Centre
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Canada
We had the ability to have:
British Goverment
American Know How
and French Culture
But we wound up with:
French Goverment
British Know How
and American Culture
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03-04-2011, 11:39 AM
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#60
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Powerplay Quarterback
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CaptainCrunch
Compare football......
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our balls are bigger.
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