Ask a chinese guy!

[the_only_turek_fan]

Is "lay ho mah" manterin or cantoneese?

How do you eat with chopsticks? Tough to teach on a mssg board I know?

[StoneCole]

ham sup gui lo (sorry about the spelling, Bruce)

[Wookie]

What's with the fuzzy animals and toys all over vehicles, covering the dash, rear dash, and rearview mirror. (stereotyping)


Why add so many accesories to cars? (stereotyping)

It often seems that older gerneration asians either keep to themsleves or are rude, not sure which?

Poor driving skills? (stereotyping)

Ignorance towards personal space or getting in peoples way, similar to the driving thing, not trying to be rude.. I've heard it has to do with a culture being used to soooo many people that it's hard to change with there being space here, I find an asian person is more likely to jump in the pool and start swimming in my lane more than anyone else. kinda like the driving thing

What do you think of the Monty python song "I like chinese"?

The world today seems absolutely crackers,
With nuclear bombs to blow us all sky high.
There's fools and idiots sitting on the trigger.
It's depressing and it's senseless, and that's why...
I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
They only come up to your knees,
Yet they're always friendly, and they're ready to please.

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
There's nine hundred million of them in the world today.
You'd better learn to like them; that's what I say.

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
They come from a long way overseas,
But they're cute and they're cuddly, and they're ready to please.


I like Chinese food.
The waiters never are rude.
Think of the many things they've done to impress.
There's Maoism, Taoism, I Ching, and Chess.

So I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
I like their tiny little trees,
Their Zen, their ping-pong, their yin, and yang-ese.

I like Chinese thought,
The wisdom that Confucious taught.
If Darwin is anything to shout about,
The Chinese will survive us all without any doubt.

So, I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
They only come up to your knees,
Yet they're wise and they're witty, and they're ready to please.

All together.

[verse in Chinese]
Wo ai zhongguo ren. (I like Chinese.)
Wo ai zhongguo ren. (I like Chinese.)
Wo ai zhongguo ren. (I like Chinese.)
Ni hao ma; ni hao ma; ni hao ma; zaijien! (How are you; how are you; how are you; goodbye!)

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
Their food is guaranteed to please,
A fourteen, a seven, a nine, and lychees.

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
I like their tiny little trees,
Their Zen, their ping-pong, their yin, and yang-ese.

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
They only come up to your knees...

[TheyCallMeBruce]

StoneCole, this is a lie. Last I checked, mine were are curly as my ex girlfriend's new hairdo.

Calgary Flames, yes they do...but I don't think it really helps with stamina. I've never tried it, but apparently some of my friend's fathers have. yeah, I don't want to know.

Flaming Homer, asians are very community and family oriented. So yeah, it's uncommon to see a house full of people. There are many factors for this, but since the question wasn't ask about why this is done, I will leave it at that. Also, it's too much explaining for me at the moment...maybe if someone asks...

Regulator75, Yes, only the older generation tend to think that way. The younger generation do not share this view, what with their anime and jpop/jrock. Although, it is hard for a chinese girl to be bringing home a japanese boyfriend...they would much rather you bring home a white guy lol. However, the old way of thinking is starting to die, what with the new global community and all.

Flashpoint, no this does not bother me one bit. I think it's a bit difficult for a chinese guy to break into the porn scene, not because of penis issues, but because the stern conversative nature of an oriental family will probably kill him.

[HelloHockeyFans]

Originally posted by TheyCallMeBruce+Aug 24 2005, 08:15 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (TheyCallMeBruce @ Aug 24 2005, 08:15 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-HelloHockeyFans@Aug 24 2005, 08:10 PM
Here's a question I know the answer to, but I'll ask Bruce anyways.

Why do we tap the table with our index and middle fingers when some one pours tea for us?

This is a sign of appreciation for someone pouring you the tea. My white friends were kinda confused at first and thought it was kinda rude to tap the table like that, but I had to explain to them this is the way things are done. You're basically saying "thank you." [/b][/quote]
Right, you are Bruce!

But to expand, the custom began in ancient China during the Qing Dynasty. Legend has it that one of the Emperors during this era loved to travel, but had to do so in disguise in fear of being assasinated if his true identity was ever discovered. The Emperor had a strange fascination with pouring tea after he observed people pour tea without spilling a single drop on the table, and he wanted to try. However, being an Emperor, he had never poured tea for himself before. Also, during the days of the Emperors in China, whenever the Emperor would enter a room, everyone was required to bow in his presence, on their knees with their head down. But since the Emperor's identity would be revealed, this was not possible while he travelled. Instead, the two fingers bent in the proper manner resembled a person on their knees, and his guards would do this each time the Emperor poured them tea to show their respect to the Emperor, essentially bowing to him.

[Tron_fdc]

Every time I go to China, the people there are REALLY nice to me and help me with whatever I need.

Are they secretly telling each other how much of a stupid white man I am?

How often do you make fun of white people in a language they can't understand?

[calf]

Originally posted by Tron_fdc@Aug 24 2005, 02:26 PM
How often do you make fun of white people in a language they can't understand?

That's what I was going to ask. Are the girls that sit behind me in class speaking Chinese secretly making fun of all the whities?

Follow up: have you met many white people who can speak either Cantonese or Mandarin?

[RougeUnderoos]

When Chinese people speak in Chinese, they "think" in English, and then translate in their head, and then speak in Chinese, right?

I suppose that question could be asked of anyone who doesn't speak English.

[Mr. Ski]

Originally posted by TheyCallMeBruce+Aug 24 2005, 08:13 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (TheyCallMeBruce @ Aug 24 2005, 08:13 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-Mr. Ski@Aug 24 2005, 08:04 PM
What's with some of the crazy food? Taste? Simple availability?

I'm confused by this question. All asian food taste great! Except for chinese herbal medicine. [/b][/quote]
Examples would be:

Chou Dofu
Sea Cucumber or Beche de Mer
Thousand-Year Old Eggs
Bird’s Nest Soup
Snake Wine
Durian
Canine and Feline
Meercat

[HelloHockeyFans]

Originally posted by Regulator75@Aug 24 2005, 08:14 PM
Do the Chinese really dislike the Japanese? Or is this only views from the older generation?

These views stem from World War 2 when the Japanese military at the time commited many atrocities against the Chinese in China. There is still anger in today's generation of the Chinese, but mostly due to the unwillingness of Japan to admit the crimes and apologize. However, the Japanese did apologize, I believe 3 or 4 years ago for the things they did.

I don't hate Japanese people for crimes their ancestors commited. Having said that, I'm sure you could find other 20-something year olds or even 30 year olds who weren't around to witness said crimes, but will hate the Japanese anyway.

A story:

I was watching DragonBall-Z once with my bestfriend back when I still lived in Calgary when we were around 14 years old. His Grandma came upstairs, saw what we were watching on TV, and proceeded to throw a glass at the TV, breaking the TV and the glass, and screaming at us for watching a Japanese-produced TV show. She was in China during the Japanese occupation so I don't blame her at all.

[HelloHockeyFans]

Originally posted by the_only_turek_fan@Aug 24 2005, 08:21 PM
Is "lay ho mah" manterin or cantoneese?

How do you eat with chopsticks? Tough to teach on a mssg board I know?

Lay Ho Mah = Cantonese.

Ni Hao Ma = Mandarin.

PS Sunil, check your email! The CPHL Islanders have an offer for you!!

[HelloHockeyFans]

Originally posted by StoneCole@Aug 24 2005, 08:23 PM
ham sup gui lo (sorry about the spelling, Bruce)

Ham Sup Gwai Lo = Perverted White Man.

[Regulator75]

Originally posted by HelloHockeyFans@Aug 24 2005, 02:32 PM
A story:

I was watching DragonBall-Z once with my bestfriend back when I still lived in Calgary when we were around 14 years old. His Grandma came upstairs, saw what we were watching on TV, and proceeded to throw a glass at the TV, breaking the TV and the glass, and screaming at us for watching a Japanese-produced TV show. She was in China during the Japanese occupation so I don't blame her at all.

Dude that's nuts... You must of been so stunned.

[jam26]

Why is it that Chinese people consistently kick my ass at poker when I do relatively well against everyone else?

[HelloHockeyFans]

Originally posted by jam26@Aug 24 2005, 08:35 PM
Why is it that Chinese people consistently kick my ass at poker when I do relatively well against everyone else?

You probably just suck.

I'm around a lot of Chinese people (obviously) and believe me, most of them suck at gambling! Makes me wonder why the love for gambling seems to be a weakness that all Chinese people have.

[Reggie Dunlop]

What's the deal with all that cymbal banging making a gawdawful racket in Chinese parades? I mean, isn't the whole idea to get people to come to the parade?

[TheyCallMeBruce]

the_only_turek_fan, it is cantonese. for those that don't know, it means "how are you?" As for chopsticks, yes not easy to teach over the internet. I'm sure google has something with picture illustrations. Chopsticks require the movement of your index, middle, and thumb finger. You would use your middle finger to push the lower stick away while using both your index and thumb finger to navigate the top stick.

StoneCole, lol yes, that does indeed mean perverted white person.

Wookie, I have no idea what the obsession is with the fuzzy things. I doubt asians can tell you other than, "they're cute." Same goes with accessories. It's suppose to make it more convenient..liek a cup holder that also holds your phone and lights up in neon blue, but really, I don't know why it's necessary. Yes, older generations tend to keep to themselves. Asians are not a "share my feelings" kind of people. Only asian women (all ages) and older asian men are horrible drivers. Most young asian men are supremely awesome drivers, such as myself. Also, asians believe it is their god given right to jaywalk. Just look at chinatown. And lastly, I find the monty python song hilarious!

HelloHockeyFans, thanks for pointing that out. Yes, that is how the story goes.

Tron_fdc, well, white people are uncommon in asia, so you're facinating to them. Also, white people usually means $$. So if you find lots of people trying to sell you crap...that's why. I make fun of my whtie friends maybe twice a week, it helps build relations I believe.

calf, tons. I've met some white girls that can speak better mandarine and cantonese than I can. which is startling and horrific to me, and also sends me on a shame spiral.

RougeUnderoos, you are correct!

Mr. Ski, I've only tried half of those things (never cat and dog, too westernized). But some of them don't taste half bad...while others are aquired taste. Really, I don't know how some chinese guy figures out how to eat a durian...I mean,that thing is all spiky and hard to open. I would have given up as soon as I open it up and that horrible smell hits me.

[icarus]

Originally posted by TheyCallMeBruce@Aug 24 2005, 08:03 PM
Table 5, it's really not that hard. You just have to remember. Be respectful to her family members...buy them good expensive gifts if necessary. It makes it even harder if you're a white guy, so be sure to always be respectful and lie about how much you enjoy the mother's cooking. Once you're in with the family, they'll always remind their daughter how awesome you are. This helps, because she will probably get annoyed and give in to you.

This is the most important piece of information I've read in this thread. But I want to know more (perhaps this would best be address to a Chinese girl, but you probably have some insights I don't have).

Are Asian girls generally interested in white guys? I've had experiences this year with a girl from Singapore and a 2nd-gen Korean girl (I think Korean is my new favourite nationality), but they were just one-time things. Which is usually fine by me, but just in case I am really interested in an Asian girl how do I know whether she is willing to date a gwai lo?

[HelloHockeyFans]

Originally posted by Reggie Dunlop@Aug 24 2005, 08:42 PM
What's the deal with all that cymbal banging making a gawdawful racket in Chinese parades? I mean, isn't the whole idea to get people to come to the parade?

The cymbals, I agree are annoying and loud to say the least! They are still used to preserve the tradition that started when legend said that an Emperor was able to defeat an enemy who led tigers and leopards (I believe), by crashing these cymbals together, frightening the animals away.

[Reggie Dunlop]

Hop Sing on Bonanza. Accurate or stereotypical portrayal of Asians in the Old West?