Tiger Woods "Transgressions" Thread - Golfin' Ain't Easy

[Dion]

Someone asked Elin why it took 7 swings to smash the car. She responded, "Fine put me down for a 4."

Apparently, the only person who can beat Tiger Woods with a golf club is his wife

What's the difference between a car and a golf ball? Tiger can drive a ball 400 yards

Tiger Woods was injured in a car accident as he pulled out of his driveway early Friday morning. It was Woods' shortest drive since an errant tee shot at the US Open.

What was Tiger Woods doing out at 2.30 in the morning? He'd gone clubbing

Tiger Woods crashed into a fire hydrant and a tree. He couldn’t decide between a wood and an iron

Apparently, Tiger admitted this crash was the closest shave he’s ever had. So Gillette has dropped his contract.

Tiger Woods wasn't seriously injured in the crash. He's still below par though

Tiger Woods is so rich that he owns lots of expensive cars. Now he has a hole in one.

[HPLovecraft]

Originally Posted by Dion

That would be way funnier if the artist didn't label the people. I can figure it out on my damn self!

[nfotiu]

Originally Posted by HPLovecraft

That would be way funnier if the artist didn't label the people. I can figure it out on my damn self!

I thought the same thing. Pretty lame.

About this whole thing, why does he feel the need to cop to the affairs? I don't care one bit about whether he's cheating on his wife. Isn't an athlete cheating on his wife about as scandalous as a figure skater coming out of the closet, or a wrestler admitting steroid use??

I do have to admit I am at least somewhat curious as to what exactly happened in the crash though. By admitting his transgressions, he's pretty much saying they were related to the crash. If we're to believe him, and she wasn't beating him, I guess that leaves the only plausible theory that he was getting away in his car, as she was chasing him and smashing his car with a golf club causing the accident.

I guess when you got that much money, you can do fun dramatic things like smashing up cars with golf clubs. Seeing as him losing an escalade is probably about as painful financially, as my wife smashing the Comcast remote control.

The thing that doesn't quite add up is the reports of him being unconscious for 6 minutes is not really that consistent with the speed of the crash. If his wife is causing injuries that significant, it is probably something he should address.

[Jayems]

It's hilarious people are DEMANDING Tiger explain himself like they feel they have some right to know what went on in every detail. He paid the fine. He got into a crash, that's all you need to know. If he had cheated in golf, then people could realistically demand comment from him, but he didn't, so everyone needs to STFU and get on with their lives and stop caring so much about someone who plays golf for a living. /with files from Jimmy Norton

[BuzzardsWife]

Tiger has NOOOOO redeeming qualities, he's butt ugly as it gets and he has a beautiful wife..i hope she dumps him..im sure she'd get alot of dough but will it be enough to keep her happy? she's got a crazy good lifestyle..just a cheating butt ugly husband!

[4X4]

Originally Posted by BuzzardsWife

Tiger has NOOOOO redeeming qualities, he's butt ugly as it gets and he has a beautiful wife..i hope she dumps him..im sure she'd get alot of dough but will it be enough to keep her happy? she's got a crazy good lifestyle..just a cheating butt ugly husband!

Well, I'm not going to comment on whether Tiger Woods is ugly or not, but I will point out that the difference between men and women is that men will overlook a bitchy personality for a hot body, and women will overlook an ugly body for a bitchin bank account. I'd say both genders are equally shallow.

[BuzzardsWife]

Originally Posted by 4X4

Well, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. And maybe those other women are willing to do stuff that his wife isn't?

oh you're just saying that to make me mad

[Roof-Daddy]

Anybody else hear Jesper Parnevik's comments about this situation?

For those who don't know, Elin was the Parnevik's nanny and they introduced her to Tiger.

http://www.accesshollywood.com/jespe..._article_26230

“I would be especially sad about it since I’m kind of — I really feel sorry for Elin — since me and my wife were at fault for hooking her up with him,” Jesper told ESPN. “We probably thought he was a better guy than he is. I would probably need to apologize to her and hope she uses a driver next time instead of the 3-iron.”

The golfer referred to reports that Elin had attacked Tiger before his early morning SUV crash on Friday, which the golf superstar has denied.

“It’s a private thing, of course,” Jesper continued. “But when you are the guy he is, the world’s best athlete, you should think more before you do stuff. . . And maybe not just do it, like Nike says.”

Ouch.

[T@T]

Originally Posted by Roof-Daddy

Anybody else hear Jesper Parnevik's comments about this situation?

For those who don't know, Elin was the Parnevik's nanny and they introduced her to Tiger.

http://www.accesshollywood.com/jespe..._article_26230



Ouch.

I was shocked when I seen that..I suspect it will hurt him more than Tiger in the end.

[T@T]

Originally Posted by BuzzardsWife

Tiger has NOOOOO redeeming qualities, he's butt ugly as it gets and he has a beautiful wife..i hope she dumps him..im sure she'd get alot of dough but will it be enough to keep her happy? she's got a crazy good lifestyle..just a cheating butt ugly husband!

Sorry honey, whether you want to admit it or not but a BILLION dollars is a huge redeeming quality to 99.99% of women.

If he was single he would have a line-up of gals stretching from here to Florida...also it's not like he's a fat slob either.

[HPLovecraft]

I think T@T has a secret crush on Tiger.

[HPLovecraft]

So the cocktail waitress is holding a press conference now...

http://www.cnn.com/2009/US/12/03/tiger.woods/index.html

[VladtheImpaler]

Originally Posted by HPLovecraft

So the cocktail waitress is holding a press conference now...

http://www.cnn.com/2009/US/12/03/tiger.woods/index.html

Unless she appears in Ass Assault #26, she is dead to me... and that goes for the White House party crashing lady too...

[Cowperson]

Originally Posted by Cowperson

The alleged "other woman" today in the New York Post with an excruciatingly detailed and convincing denial of any involvement with Tiger Woods.

http://www.nypost.com/p/news/nationa...iYINolBBteiOFL

Cowperson

Lordy, lordy, where do you find these women?

The FIRST woman, who had a wonderfully detailed and convincing denial in the New York Post a few days ago, now says she was lying about the denial!!!

http://www.nypost.com/p/news/nationa...t5uXCYUYyN9MJI

"Thump, Thump, Thump" . . . . Tiger's head bouncing off the wall.

Best to take the time to read the first link and then the second. Which is the lie? Wow.

Cowperson

[Bertuzzied]

. I would probably need to apologize to her and hope she uses a driver next time instead of the 3-iron.”

The golfer referred to reports that Elin had attacked Tiger before his early morning SUV crash on Friday, which the golf superstar has denied.

“It’s a private thing, of course,” Jesper continued. “But when you are the guy he is, the world’s best athlete, you should think more before you do stuff. . . And maybe not just do it, like Nike says.”

That is frigging hilarious! Go Jesper! People think it all the time but not enough people have the balls to say stuff like this! awesome.

[troutman]

Originally Posted by T@T

a BILLION dollars is a huge redeeming quality to 99.99% of women.

The normal considerations of love and romance do not apply in the world of wealth, fame and rare beauty.

It is a mercenary world with completely different rules.

[mikey_the_redneck]

Originally Posted by BuzzardsWife

oh you're just saying that to make me mad

From a mans point of view, it could very well be true though.

[Dion]

Then, however, Tiger spends the next two paragraphs basically attacking everyone and anyone who he somehow thinks is responsible for his do-it-yourself fall from grace — everyone except the one truly guilty party, which would be Tiger himself. He lambastes the tabloids and news media for having the audacity to invade his privacy, as if to say, How dare you do this to me?

We've learned much about Tiger in the past week, little of it good. We've learned he wants all of your attention when he's playing golf, or trying to sell you something, but then gets angry when you want to know any more about him. We've learned that in many ways, he's just another outrageously rich, self-centered jock.

But today, with Tiger at the nadir of his life, it makes him sound like a man who is more sorry about being caught than he is about cheating on his wife.

Let's hope that isn't true, but make no mistake, the word choices that were made in that statement provide a revealing window into the way this man thinks.

http://www.usatoday.com/sports/colum...ds-image_N.htm

[SeeGeeWhy]

I wonder how long his liasions have been going on and if he would have been behaving that way if his father were still around.

[burn_this_city]

I sort of feel for the guy. It be tough to stay true when beautiful women likely throw themselves at him constantly. Though judging by the pictures he could probably do better. He should have realized that eventually one of them would go to the press in an attempt to become famous.