What's grosser - puke or poop?

[troutman]

Smelling puke makes everyone else want to puke.

Smelling poop does not make everyone else want to poop.

[theExpendable]

Originally Posted by Traditional_Ale

Forget all about "bad mom" or whatever. This makes you an effing hero! I'm almost barfing looking at the picture!

soooooooooo gross ....... yuke

[drewboy12]

OK well this is how I would list it... Pooping would go in the list with the feel goods... Pissing and cumming. Puking... taste gross and dosnt feel good. whats better then a good dump in the morning?

[HPLovecraft]

Wow, so, after going through this thread, all 6 educating pages of it, it's still very close. Puke is grosser by two votes, at 13, while poop is trailing at 11.

Interesting, very interesting...

[The Fonz]

Poop is absolutely grosser.

[flamestalker]

Originally Posted by HPLovecraft

Wow, so, after going through this thread, all 6 educating pages of it, it's still very close. Puke is grosser by two votes, at 13, while poop is trailing at 11.

Interesting, very interesting...

Haha, poop is trailing. For whatever reason it sounds so funny in my head.

[Mike Oxlong]

My vote has to be poop.
We have a newborn son that is 4 weeks old. About 2 weeks ago I was downstairs and I heard my wife yelling "Oh my God get up here" I was freaking out thinking something was wrong with the kid so I bolt upstairs to see what's wrong. As I enter the baby's room I see my wife standing by the change table with poop on her hands, up her arms, all over the change table, dripping down the side and even some on the carpet. I guess when she was changing him and she decided to remove the diaper he decided that would be a good time to have some explosive diahrea.

Being the helpful husband I am I immediatley jump into action and help her by grabbing wipes and cleaning stuff up. As I am bent down at the end of the change table cleaning crap off the carpet and the side of the change table he decides to fire round 2 which is another even more powerful crap. Unfortunately for me I am bent over right in the line of fire and catch the crap right to the side of the head.

My wife said it looked like a hamburger patty on the side of my head. I have never seen her laugh that hard in my life and in fact she might still be laughing right now.

After getting over the original shock of having your son poo on your head I ran into the shower and cranked it on. I gave myself a wicked headache because the water was still ice cold as I didn't really want to wait for it to warm up.

Until he pukes on my head or right in my mouth my vote goes for poo.

[Hemi-Cuda]

whatever desire i had to ever have kids is completely gone now

[The Fonz]

Damn I'm out of thanks!

[HPLovecraft]

It ended in a freaking tie 13-13. Lame. I never voted, and since I created the thread, my vote is worth 20,000 regular plebian votes, so I vote poop.

Poop wins! Now this thread can die with closure. Phew.

[BuzzardsWife]

Originally Posted by Puxlut

Does it make me a bad mom thatI took this pic?


Poop FTW!

Reminds me of our daughters "poop parties"..she would poop..and smear it everywhere..would gross me and buzzard out so badly. Your baby is soooooo adorable! That smile is saying 'thanks for changing me mom'.

[onetwo_threefour]

I'm a little concerned I just a coke bottle.















For me it's definitely poop. Unless it's my dog, who eats other dog's poop, then vomits it up several hours later. That is the ultimate in gross nastiness, I can't even go near it.

[Huntingwhale]

If I puke in my mouth, I am able to swollow it back down even though it tastes gross. However if I had poop in my mouth, I would never swallow it down.

[pylon]

Has to be poop. We are tricked into thinking poop is less stinky than it really is. The toilet water really masks the smell. If you puke in a toilet it is virtually odor free, when you poop it still smells foul.

My best experience with this was when I was 18 and camping with some friends in the early 90's a Maclean Creek. There was a group of scabby headbangers in the site next to us that were giving us a really rough time, trying to pick fights with us all night, and one even pissed in my car window. We had to be out by 6 am because a couple of us worked that day. So at 6 in the morning we woke up, packed our stuff, and these guys were totally passed out in their tents. I had a five alarm deuce on deck touching cloth. So I went over to there picnic table, and dropped the nastiest beer, dorito, hotdogs and beans coiler on their hibachi. The smell was so foul and I was so hung over that I started to dry heave from the smell and ended up puking all over their lawn chairs. One other guy in our group puked from my puking and actually managed to hold it in until he made it all the way across the site and all over their cooler. It was so nasty, yet so funny. Never piss in my window is all I can advise anyone.

Wish I could've seen their faces that morning.

Needless to say we left fast.

[The Fonz]

Originally Posted by pylon

Has to be poop. We are tricked into thinking poop is less stinky than it really is. The toilet water really masks the smell. If you puke in a toilet it is virtually odor free, when you poop it still smells foul.

My best experience with this was when I was 18 and camping with some friends in the early 90's a Maclean Creek. There was a group of scabby headbangers in the site next to us that were giving us a really rough time, trying to pick fights with us all night, and one even pissed in my car window. We had to be out by 6 am because a couple of us worked that day. So at 6 in the morning we woke up, packed our stuff, and these guys were totally passed out in their tents. I had a five alarm deuce on deck touching cloth. So I went over to there picnic table, and dropped the nastiest beer, dorito, hotdogs and beans coiler on their hibachi. The smell was so foul and I was so hung over that I started to dry heave from the smell and ended up puking all over their lawn chairs. One other guy in our group puked from my puking and actually managed to hold it in until he made it all the way across the site and all over their cooler. It was so nasty, yet so funny. Never piss in my window is all I can advise anyone.

Wish I could've seen their faces that morning.

Needless to say we left fast.

Best thing I've ever read!

[Flames_Gimp]

Originally Posted by fotze

What you don't do is hat we did. My wife picked him up and hovered him while I was getting the bath ready, we were to start by a gentle hosing off with the shower head, but unfortunately as I was turning the bath knobs and he was hovering above me, he decided to let another diarrhea blast all over my back. The grossness of this was not enough as I got the same 24 hr puking/bowl splattering affliction that was compliments of the Children's Hospital, kid will have to be on the deathbed before going back to that germ receptacle.

Have another newborn on the way in 1 month or so and I am totally not looking forward to it, what an idiot I am. I'm going to do a self vasectomy.

I thought you liked getting a brown shower

[Hemi-Cuda]

Originally Posted by fotze

Rarely actually laugh out loud but I had to re-read that story a couple times. hall of fame post.

agreed, that's right up there with snot boy and the mac & cheese restaurant poop story. i save my thanks for posts that i think really deserve them, but i wish i could give 10 to that one

[Hemi-Cuda]

was looking for a poop related thread to post this in. guy on Reddit explains the time he worked at a movie theater and had to clean up the woman's washroom after an "incident"

http://www.reddit.com/r/fffffffuuuuu...ssible/c5vlou6

[Coach]

Originally Posted by pylon

Has to be poop. We are tricked into thinking poop is less stinky than it really is. The toilet water really masks the smell. If you puke in a toilet it is virtually odor free, when you poop it still smells foul.

My best experience with this was when I was 18 and camping with some friends in the early 90's a Maclean Creek. There was a group of scabby headbangers in the site next to us that were giving us a really rough time, trying to pick fights with us all night, and one even pissed in my car window. We had to be out by 6 am because a couple of us worked that day. So at 6 in the morning we woke up, packed our stuff, and these guys were totally passed out in their tents. I had a five alarm deuce on deck touching cloth. So I went over to there picnic table, and dropped the nastiest beer, dorito, hotdogs and beans coiler on their hibachi. The smell was so foul and I was so hung over that I started to dry heave from the smell and ended up puking all over their lawn chairs. One other guy in our group puked from my puking and actually managed to hold it in until he made it all the way across the site and all over their cooler. It was so nasty, yet so funny. Never piss in my window is all I can advise anyone.

Wish I could've seen their faces that morning.

Needless to say we left fast.

THIS is awesome. This is pure vengence and is hilarious. I have to say I'm not a fan of Woods story. To deliberitly take vengance years later for something that was completely accidental is pretty petty IMO.

But this story is absolutely perfect.

[Red John]

Those looking for good poop stories try out sh*ttystories.com

Third one down (Spicy Food Blowout) is quite humorous. Also, didn't see it on that site but the Ryan's Steak house story has to be one of the all-time classics. Half the key to these stories is the ability to tell it well and those two certainly do that.