Married Money

[alltherage]

Just a quick question. When you got married, did you share all accounts, keep money totally seperate, or make some hybrid of the two? How did it work?

[Raekwon]

We are getting married next month and we have combined our accounts. We just find it easier to keep track of income and bill payments etc.

[The Ditch]

Originally Posted by Raekwon

We are getting married next month and we have combined our accounts. We just find it easier to keep track of income and bill payments etc.

Getting married in September and yeah we've already combined our accounts for the same reasons.

[V]

I make it, she spends it. After 9 years we've got it down pat.

[Reaper]

My wife and I combined all of our accounts before we were married yet after we started living together. With all the money being "our money" it just made things easier.

[alltherage]

How did you find sharing for buying gifts, suprises, etc? Doesn't she find out?

[habernac]

combined accounts shortly before we were married.

For gifts, I'll take out some cash. Doesn't all have to be at once.

[Raekwon]

Originally Posted by alltherage

How did you find sharing for buying gifts, suprises, etc? Doesn't she find out?

She doesn't look at the bank accounts so she wouldn't see it anyway but in a situation like christmas you could always just withdrawl the money for gifts and she would never know or even know how little you spent on her

[Old Yeller]

My wife and I have our own separate accounts that our paychecks are deposited into and then we contribute a % of that to our joint account where all the bills are paid from. I make more than her so I put a little more in the joint account each month. We've been doing it this way for a couple of years and works for us.

[jam26]

Combined accounts. She gets $100 per pay in a separate 'shopping' account. I have no such account, but that's married life!

[tigger777]

My wife and I do the exactly the same thing as you and it's been working for us also. This keeps the surprise gift as a surprise.

Originally Posted by Old Yeller

My wife and I have our own separate accounts that our paychecks are deposited into and then we contribute a % of that to our joint account where all the bills are paid from. I make more than her so I put a little more in the joint account each month. We've been doing it this way for a couple of years and works for us.

[The Goon]

Originally Posted by Old Yeller

My wife and I have our own separate accounts that our paychecks are deposited into and then we contribute a % of that to our joint account where all the bills are paid from. I make more than her so I put a little more in the joint account each month. We've been doing it this way for a couple of years and works for us.

This is essentially what we do. Just after we got married last summer, we met with a financial counsellor who helped put us on the right track. I would totally suggest this.

[You Need a Thneed]

We combined our accounts. There are plenty of ways to keep gifts a surprise.

[red sky]

I am not married but my GF and I combined accounts but we also have a seperate account where we put an equal portion of our income into. She can make all the lavish purchases she likes without me having to see it. I can charge my misc. spending, such as lunch at Maid, without her knowing. But in all seriousness, it helps with gift purchases and the such.

[KTrain]

Originally Posted by Old Yeller

My wife and I have our own separate accounts that our paychecks are deposited into and then we contribute a % of that to our joint account where all the bills are paid from. I make more than her so I put a little more in the joint account each month. We've been doing it this way for a couple of years and works for us.

My wife and I did the same thing until we had our first kid. Once she was on maternity leave it made more sense to manage everything with one account. It makes things much easier.

[Tower]

Gifts... Macaroni Duck Picture... Just use a nice frame.

[BlackArcher101]

Originally Posted by Old Yeller

My wife and I have our own separate accounts that our paychecks are deposited into and then we contribute a % of that to our joint account where all the bills are paid from. I make more than her so I put a little more in the joint account each month. We've been doing it this way for a couple of years and works for us.

If I were married, this is what I would be pushing for.

[MarchHare]

Originally Posted by Old Yeller

My wife and I have our own separate accounts that our paychecks are deposited into and then we contribute a % of that to our joint account where all the bills are paid from. I make more than her so I put a little more in the joint account each month. We've been doing it this way for a couple of years and works for us.

This is what my wife and I do as well, and it works fantastic for us.

We actually have two joint accounts, one for recurring monthly bills and one for random day-to-day expenses. The former is for stuff like our mortgage payments, property taxes, insurance, etc., and the latter is for things like groceries, household goods, going out for drinks/dinner/movie/etc.

We earn almost the same salary, so we contribute to the joint accounts equally. If there was a larger income discrepency between us, we'd likely divide it proportionally.

The best part of this system is that we never have to ask the other permission if we want to buy something with our own money. We each contribute an equal amount to our shared expenses, but everything left over after that can be spent however we want.

[Sylvanfan]

Originally Posted by fotze

I think it can work both ways, especially if bot earn similar cake, I am in the make she spends it mold, works good, because she doesn't spend like sylvanfan's wife and neither do I. I we had differening opinions on saving and stuff I would imagine it could get ugly.

Ya the gift thing has always been odd, use a credit card and buy before the statement.

Hey!

I've slowly been able to reign my wife's spending habits in over the years. My biggest problem was that her sister had an seemingly unlimited budget to buy whatever she wanted, and I always heard that excuse of well My sister spent.....The recession has forced her sister to curb her spending and as a result my wife is a lot more controlled too.

If your wife has a sister who's married to a guy with more money than you...you're fata'd. I suggest you just hit on her sister and hope her husband is abusive or neglectful and she'll be happy to spend his money on you while you be nice to her.

[SeeGeeWhy]

Combined accounts. My wife kicked my ass off of my credit card (ab)using ways.

Seriously - stress related to not seeing eye to eye on the way the household money will work can be a huge source of misery for your relationship. If you can't be honest and talk about money, you're doomed.

Keeping presents secret is nice and all, but it should be way down the priority list when it comes to running the household finances.

For instance - do you understand the savings and debts that both of you are bringing to the table? What are your spending habits? How do you use your credit cards and/or lines of credit? What are your retirement goals? How important are things like vacations, etc?

It comes down to understanding how much you're bringing in and how much you're spending (budgeting), and then talking about priorities when it comes to saving vs consumption (both short and long term).

Welcome to the world of compromise and priorities. You need to have these talks, and the sooner the better.