Goatee Prevalence

[4X4]

Are you calling your wife ugly? Kinda harsh, bro.

[photon]

A crappy goatee also draws attention away from thinning hair!

[Tower]

Try a thin Goatee and tinning hair!!!

Or be the one who can't grow a true goat as the ends don't reach down like handlebars.

That's not me of course.

[4X4]

I wish I was little bit taller,
I wish I was a baller
I wish I had a girl who looked good
I would call her
I wish I had a rabbit in a hat with a bat
and a '64 Impala

I wish I was like six-foot-nine
So I could get with Leoshi
Cause she don't know me but yo she's really fine
You know I see her all the time
Everywhere I go, and even in my dreams
I can scheme of ways to make her mine
Cause I know she's livin phat
Her boyfriend's tall and he plays ball
So how am I gonna compete with that
'Cause when it comes to playing basketball
I'm always last to be picked
And in some cases never picked at all
So I just lean upon the wall
Or sit up in the bleachers with the rest of the girls
Who came to watch their men ball
Dag y'all! I never understood
Why the jocks get the fly girls
And me I get the hood rats
I tell 'em scat, skittle, skibobble
Got hit with a bottle
And put in the hospital, for talkin' that mess
I confess it's a shame when you livin' in a city
That's the size of a box and nobody knows yo' name
Glad I came to my senses
Like quick-quick got sick-sick to my stomach
Overcome with my thoughts of me and her together
Right?
So when I asked her out she said I wasn't her type
(rpt 1, 1)

I wish I had a brand-new car
So far, I got this hatchback
And everywhere I go, yo I gets laughed at
And when I'm in my car I'm laid back
I got an 8-track and a spare tire in the backseat
But that's flat
And do you really wanna know what's really wack, What
See I can't even get a date
So, what do you think of that?
I heard that prom night is the bomb night
With a hood rat you can hold tight
But really tho' on figuero
When I'm in my car I can't even get a hello
Well so many people wanna cruise Crenshaw on Sunday
Well then I'm gonna have to get in my car and go
You know I take the 110 to the 105
Get off on Crenshaw tell my homies look alive
Cause it's hard to survive
Livin' in a concrete jungle and
These girls just keep passin' me by
She looks fly, she looks fly
Makes me say my, my, my
(rpt 1, 1)

I wish I was a little bit taller...
I wish I was a baller...
I wish I was a little bit taller y'all
I wish I was a baller (3)

Hey, I wish I had my way
'Cause everyday would be a Friday
You could even speed on the highway
I would play ghetto games
Name my kids ghetto names
Little Mookie, big Al, Lorraine
Yo you know that's on the real
So if you're down on your luck
Then you should know just how I feel
Cause if you don't want me around
See I go simple, I go easy, I go greyhound
Hey, you, what's that sound?
Everybody look what's going down
Ahhhh, yes, ain't that fresh?
Everybody wants to get down like that
(rpt 1, 1)

I wish, I wish, I wish...

[/troutman]

[evilcougar]

Originally Posted by fotze

She's blind

I'm having a Dave Chapelle moment here....anyone?

[TSXCman]

This thread is hilarious/awesome.

I now know the truth of my goatee

[V]

I thought the goatee died in the 90s? I think they're ridiculous.

[TSXCman]

Originally Posted by V

I thought the goatee died in the 90s? I think they're ridiculous.

and you think fat people died in the 90s too i bet

[Hack&Lube]

Can't even grow one if I tried.

[V]

I used to make fun of fat people. Then I quit smoking and it didn't seem so funny anymore...

[4X4]

Originally Posted by evilcougar

I'm having a Dave Chapelle moment here....anyone?

Mr. Bigsby, after 19 years of marriage, why would you divorce your wife?
Because she's a goatee lover.

[Madman]

The best part about fat guy's goatee is when he grows it down onto his 2nd and 3rd chins so it looks like some hideous hair water fall type disaster.

Wow, where did your brutal fat neck go to? I can't see it at all with your suave goatee.

[troutman]

Goatee dudes just have a secret desire to become hypnotists.

[KTrain]

"Look into my eyes. Look into my eyes."

Originally Posted by troutman

Goatee dudes just have a secret desire to become hypnotists.

[Galakanokis]

What about us poor shlubs that are just to lazy to shave and a goatee is pretty much the only place facial hair will grow? Kinda like Joe Dirt without the sideburns...

[mikey_the_redneck]

I guess I would consider myself slightly chubby..............maybe 20lbs over-weight, but I wear a bad-ass goatee. I have a nice jaw line that isn't padded with whale blubber and people tell me it suits me so I'm gonna keep it until winter for sure.

and........your height is only a deficiency if you see it that way fotze.

[jolinar of malkshor]

I graduated from the goatee in college to the more sophisticated beard. Not the long scruffy carp just the nice 4-5 day length.

[iggypop]