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Old 05-14-2009, 11:23 AM   #81
pope04
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I know how that guy feels.
This guy?

(978): i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
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Old 05-14-2009, 11:48 AM   #82
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nm
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Old 05-14-2009, 12:10 PM   #83
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(248): Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
This is similar to me in the past. Texting a girl if she wanted to come watch my game, but it goes out "Sup babe? You wanna watch my hand tonight?"

Or when I inform my friends that we are going to Brian's house to watch the flames game. "Hey guys. We're all going to Asian's house to watch the Flames game"
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Old 05-14-2009, 01:04 PM   #84
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Another Gem:

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(617): So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
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Old 05-14-2009, 03:34 PM   #85
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Originally Posted by albertGQ View Post
This is similar to me in the past. Texting a girl if she wanted to come watch my game, but it goes out "Sup babe? You wanna watch my hand tonight?"

Or when I inform my friends that we are going to Brian's house to watch the flames game. "Hey guys. We're all going to Asian's house to watch the Flames game"
I can't stand using "LOL" on the end of my texts, so I type out hahahahaha instead. The only problem with that is my blackberry now changes it to "hashing". You can see the problem here.

"what are you up to tonight"
"sitting on a patio, getting wasted hashing"
"what?"

Autocorrect has been producing some pretty interesting texts in my life lately.
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Old 05-14-2009, 04:48 PM   #86
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I can't stand using "LOL" on the end of my texts, so I type out hahahahaha instead. The only problem with that is my blackberry now changes it to "hashing". You can see the problem here.

"what are you up to tonight"
"sitting on a patio, getting wasted hashing"
"what?"

Autocorrect has been producing some pretty interesting texts in my life lately.
You can save hahahahahaha as a word in your phone. But if you did that your texts would not be as humourous. It's a conundrum.
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Old 05-14-2009, 06:03 PM   #87
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(913): So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
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Old 05-14-2009, 09:50 PM   #88
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(907): I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.

Wizard, is that you?
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Old 05-14-2009, 09:52 PM   #89
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(570): why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
(1-570): you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911

I thought this one was gold.
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Old 05-14-2009, 10:10 PM   #90
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(312): She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!

(612): I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?

(248): Cold hands, warm shart.

(248): Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
(312): It's worth it.
(248): How worth it?
(312): Back door worth it

(586): look its a map shaped like a penis where do you think it goes
response (586): to fotze's mom
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Old 05-15-2009, 10:20 AM   #91
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Well I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who does this.

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(480): I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
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Old 05-15-2009, 05:00 PM   #92
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(954): Your an
(1-954): Actually, it's "you're an "
(954): My point exactly

hahaha
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Old 05-15-2009, 07:22 PM   #93
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(208): She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her

Gold.
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Old 05-16-2009, 02:02 AM   #94
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(925): I'm kindof freaked out about my c0ck not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
(713): Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
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Old 05-16-2009, 09:10 AM   #95
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tron_fdc View Post
I can't stand using "LOL" on the end of my texts, so I type out hahahahaha instead. The only problem with that is my blackberry now changes it to "hashing". You can see the problem here.

"what are you up to tonight"
"sitting on a patio, getting wasted hashing"
"what?"

Autocorrect has been producing some pretty interesting texts in my life lately.
and on that note:

(857): seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my f***s into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable.
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Old 05-16-2009, 12:35 PM   #96
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(703): he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
(703): and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
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Old 05-16-2009, 01:36 PM   #97
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I'm actually really disappointed in myself that I didn't click on this link until just now. Until this point I never thought a thread could make me laugh harder than Fcccckkkkkk! This thread seriously needs a sticky.
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Old 05-16-2009, 02:09 PM   #98
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(218): Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?


(310): my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.


(812): Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this sh*t is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
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Old 05-16-2009, 10:11 PM   #99
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I literally LOL'd at this one:

(636): dude you just took shreks wife home. what the [f-word] is wrong with you
(1-636): when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
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Old 05-17-2009, 11:58 AM   #100
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(918): The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.

(313): sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
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