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Old 02-05-2009, 03:39 PM   #1
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Default 30 something women feel betrayed by feminism

I guess fish need bicycles after all.

Increasing numbers of my feminist friends are giving up their careers for love and children and baking.

I have business success but it doesn't make you happy.” Nicki P, 35 and single, works in the music industry and adds: “It was all a game back then. Now I am panicking. No one told me that having fun is not as fun as I thought.”

http://women.timesonline.co.uk/tol/l...cle5662099.ece
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Old 02-05-2009, 03:53 PM   #2
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I think the title should say "Dumb 30 something woman feels betrayed by feminism".

It is a funny article. She basically says "I decided to not get married and have kids. Now I'm 35 and I don't have a husband or any kids. What the hell happened"?

Then she tries to blame it on someone else.
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Old 02-05-2009, 03:53 PM   #3
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Hey, the grass is always greener on the other side, right?
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Old 02-05-2009, 03:55 PM   #4
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Call me womanly, but I've always put success in relationships (friends, family, spouse) ahead of my career and life goals.

I guess I'm just needy that way.
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Old 02-05-2009, 03:57 PM   #5
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There's a negative correlation between a woman's education and no. of children she has.
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Old 02-05-2009, 04:02 PM   #6
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I've never understood the "must advance in my career" type, male or female. Good to have goals, yes, but not the only goal.

I work to live, I DO NOT live to work.
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Old 02-05-2009, 04:13 PM   #7
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What she needs is to have a little captain in her.

Then she can make me a sandwich and tell me all about that cute little feminist movement.
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Old 02-05-2009, 04:20 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RougeUnderoos View Post
I think the title should say "Dumb 30 something woman feels betrayed by feminism".

It is a funny article. She basically says "I decided to not get married and have kids. Now I'm 35 and I don't have a husband or any kids. What the hell happened"?

Then she tries to blame it on someone else.
Well said. Isn't the idea of feminism is to have a choice? Before it was all about staying home and letting the husband provide. Now you have the choice between career and family. Excuses, excuses.
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Old 02-05-2009, 04:23 PM   #9
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There's a reason women evolved to have smaller feet than men.

So they can get closer to the kitchen sink.

Evolution ....... a wonderful thing
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Old 02-05-2009, 04:27 PM   #10
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Some brands of feminism miss the mark by completely ignoring the concept of choice and self-determination and describing a path too happiness that is supposed to work for all adherents. It started with an excellent message of telling women what they could do, but somehow morphed into a movement that attempted to tell women what they should do. Yes, you can be a CEO or a race-car driver or a playwright, but that doesn't mean that you'll be happy doing those things. Men who are driven to succeed at all costs often have midlife crises when they realize that the path they've been following all their lives isn't going to lead them to happiness; guess what Zoe Lewis, your current predicament has little to do with feminism and everything to do with the human condition.
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Old 02-05-2009, 04:35 PM   #11
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Just more proof that the "biological clock" exists in women.

Thank god I've got a wiener.
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Old 02-05-2009, 04:35 PM   #12
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I completely understand where this lady's coming from.

She's in pretty much the same situation as all us nice guys who were trained during adolescence to be "sensitive 90's kind of guys," only to see jerks and ######bags snap up all the hot broads. What a rip off.

I blame Ralph Tresvant.
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Old 02-05-2009, 04:37 PM   #13
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Quote:
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What she needs is to have a little captain in her.
Do you do the "Captain Pose" after? ie The Captain Morgan foot on the barrel stance?

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Old 02-05-2009, 04:44 PM   #14
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Quote:
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Do you do the "Captain Pose" after? ie The Captain Morgan foot on the barrel stance?

After, howabout at the beginning the middle the end.
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Old 02-05-2009, 05:00 PM   #15
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More self-absorbed women. Nothing like wallowing in narcissism!

Somehow I feel it will end up being my fault anyways.
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Old 02-05-2009, 05:04 PM   #16
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There are a ton of women like this here in NY. Career minded, great at what they do, ferociously independent....and downright miserable because in the end they are alone.

I do think women have it a little harder than we do on this front, because in a way they do have to make a choice between one or the other...you really can't be good at both. And honestly, while I like ambitious people, I don't want to date a career woman (same way I dont like tomboys....if i wanted someone who acted like a dude, i'd just hang out with my guy friends).

I think by nature, us guys have this natural need to provide and lead our families anyway, so we're not pulled back into the home quite as much.

Last edited by Table 5; 02-05-2009 at 05:07 PM.
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Old 02-05-2009, 05:17 PM   #17
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It's true feminism should be about providing choice, but I can see how people would feel they have been indoctrinated a little to feel they have to be something different and then find out it's not what they wanted.
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Old 02-05-2009, 05:24 PM   #18
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Feminism has also resulted in women carrying a large amount of our society, leaving us men with tons of free time and more money. Thanks ladies!

I wouldn't call feminism a failure, but ~50 years after the fact, the pendulum has swung the other way as women are discovering imbalances between their inherent natures and feminists ideals. Humility follows pride, but eventually, the concepts of feminism will eventually be seamlessly integrated into our society. Unfortunately, the current generation of women has the magnifying glass on them and only a very shallow well of intelligent support and history to draw upon. Feminism will be more an endurance trial for them than any generation since the founders, eventually society will re-adjusts itself to womens new place in the world, but it won't be much fun for the current crop. Sorry ladies.
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Old 02-05-2009, 05:29 PM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GoinAllTheWay View Post
I've never understood the "must advance in my career" type, male or female. Good to have goals, yes, but not the only goal.

I work to live, I DO NOT live to work.
Totally agreed. I know a few years ago, I used to be go-go-go with my career. I made alot of mistakes and lost alot because of it, and now I'm aiming for more balance in my life - and hopefully, the rest will follow.

Funny, this was the kind of stuff I told the girl I dated for a while which caused her to end our relationship for "career goals" - namely, working up to 40+ straight days regularly.
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Old 02-05-2009, 05:47 PM   #20
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As many have said--feminism shouldn't be about having to push that glass ceiling. It shouldn't be that you have to have a career and you have to spend 60 hours a week working. It should be about the woman who works the same forty hours a week as her male counterpart who gets paid 10% less because she's a woman. It should be about being just as qualified for a position as a man is, but losing that job because of being a woman. It's about stupid little gender discriminations, it shouldn't just be some grand plan of career over all else. It's about searching for the same happiness/success that men find, whether that's in a woman's career, a woman's family life, whatever that is.

No one said you can't have a family, you can't be married, etc. If you want to have a family--have one! If you want to get married--get married! If you want a career--have one! You can even have all three, I swear. My boss is married with two kids and runs a successful salon. She's not making 7 figures a year, no, but she's damn sure successful, and has a happy family life.

Really, this woman needs to just shut up, go find a date, and move on with her life. She's not 55, she's 35, and she still has time to find a husband and have some kids. It's not feminism's fault (though feminism is incredibly flawed anyway), it's her own fault for obviously ignoring what she wanted all along, for what she apparently thought she was SUPPOSED to want.
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