When it's time...

[The Fonz]

Being single looks a lot more fun that it actually is. Seeing as you've been in this relationship for 4.5 years, you've likely forgot how it feels to truly be single, and you only remember the good times.

If you break up with her just so you can experience the "single life" again, I think you'll regret it. She probably won't be there waiting for you once your ready to get back in a relationship. And what if you break up with her, then your single friends get girlfriends a couple months down the road? I doubt you'd want to tag along and be the 5th wheel, and they may not want you there either.

If you're going to break up, only do it for the right reason, which is that you don't care about her anymore.

As for "missing the single life", I think almost every guy our age feels this way if he's in a long term relationship, it's natural.

[kermitology]

Originally Posted by Table 5

mostly because of the lack of input, i remember

Erm.. yeah, input/output..

But in seriousness, being single when almost all of your friends are married, engaged or on their way, sucks.. Getting people to hang out with you is a freaking chore. They always have to check with the wife..

[jammies]

Originally Posted by kermitology

But in seriousness, being single when almost all of your friends are married, engaged or on their way, sucks.. Getting people to hang out with you is a freaking chore. They always have to check with the wife..

On the other hand, when you go over to hang out, you usually get a home-cooked meal out of it. And if the wife likes you, she'll put in a good word for you with her single/divorced friends.

Seriously though, I make an effort to be friends with my friends' wives, at least to the extent that my voice on the phone doesn't automatically make them cringe. "Honey, Jammies wants to know if you want to come over, smoke some crack and watch asian gangster movies - isn't he just a zany rapscallion!"

[Ozy_Flame]

Hey, I don't have a problem that I'm single and everyone else my age (25-28) is getting married off...Most of my married friends can still enjoy a good drink or a night out.

Being single has its low points sometimes, but most of the time I truly enjoy my freedom and the ability to flirt without fear of reprisal. Bachelorhood definitely has it's ups and downs, but when everyone around you is getting married, it's hard to see the ups. This, however, isn't me.

[missdpuck]

Originally Posted by Table 5

BBQ, I think half of CP is in the same boat. So let us know what you decide to do so we can all do the same. One for all....

A mass CP cult wedding.......... ceremony performed by Father McGrath, or whatever title he might want to use

[Wookie]

Being single is awesome!!! However, if I found someone I'd rather spend my time with than myself I think that'd be a whole lot better!

Most of my friends are married or engaged, or pretty much married or engaged.

They love vicariously living through my stories/escapades and always want me to do this and that with such and such girl. At the end of the night though, which usually is around midnight these days they're going home with the wife/gf and not with me to some bar or party. Usually because at my age (late 20's) there is no bar/party because people don't seem to do that very much because they're with their wife/gf.

I get included in very little because it always seems to start with couple going for dinner, getting anyone to do anything I want to do is very difficult, and the guys trips still happen, but usually everyone is married and it's not all the much fun being out of town and trying to party with a bunch of dudes on their cell phones at about 11:00pm, the shorter trips in between and throughout the year don't happen or are couples trips and are never things I get invited too. Not that I'd want to go anyway...

[missdpuck]

I love being single too Wookie. Being with someone just to be with someone is a huge mistake but then again some people just can't be alone, and there's nothing wrong with that. The other day I was thinking how at least half the people I work with were divorced by 30...and now many of them are married to co-workers and it just seems so odd. Their relationships are always so melodramatic.

[Cube Inmate]

Been married a year...been together exclusively for 5+. There are occasions where I'm nostalgic for the single times, but something as simple as a weekend alone is enough to make me see the difference between singledom and companionship.

So, follow these steps:

1) Spend at least a couple of days apart...
2) Make decision based on gut...empty = stay together. Relieved = cut & run.

[Bill Bumface]

I've decided I kill the grass on whatever side of the fence I'm on. I was in a very similar situation, 26 and wondering if this was it for me, would I ever be single again? It really bothered me to be honest. I wasn't sure if I was done with the whole single thing. Then thanks to some extremely Jerry Springer like events, I found myself single again. At first it obviously sucked, coming out of a long term relationship especially under completely messed up circumstances you never saw coming. Now however, being single is pretty awesome... mostly.

I went on a Flames trip to Florida with a bunch of guys (we do this every year) but I was always the one who was on his cell phone at 11pm letting her know I wasn't getting rebellion in the scrip club. This time it was so much more fun.

I went Euro Cup this June on a guys trip, all of us single, and it was amazing. I'd never been on a big trip like that with anyone but my girlfriend or family, and it was totally different. Don't get me wrong, both ways are good, but this was an experienced I had missed out on. Next week I'm headed to Oktoberfest with another single buddy. We'll probably get shut down the whole time by stuck up Euro chicks, but who cares, it will be so much fun.

Going to the bar is actually fun again, I don't have to worry about having a really busy schedule and not 'making time' for anyone.... life is great. Except for dating. Dating sucks and is way too much work. I'm amazed at the number of first dates you can go on without finding anyone worthy of a second. It's a waste of time and money, and I'm usually left wishing I had stayed home and played video games instead. Especially at 26, you see a lot of good girls who are married or with guys long term and really start to wonder about what selection is left. The good thing as a guy, is you'll always be able to go younger if need be. I think I have a good 10 years left to find a wife, and I'm in no rush... haha. I'm often pretty envious of my friends who have found good girls and locked them up, as they don't have to suffer through the dating crap and are getting them through their good years before they're old and wrinkly

I was going to try and convince you that being single sucked more than you think in this post (which is for sure true) but I think it's working out pretty well for me for now... haha. It'll be out of my system eventually though, and hopefully the dating scene picks up for me by then.

[bigtmac19]

Originally Posted by kermitology

Erm.. yeah, input/output..

But in seriousness, being single when almost all of your friends are married, engaged or on their way, sucks.. Getting people to hang out with you is a freaking chore. They always have to check with the wife..

Same here

[CaptainCrunch]

I'm so lonely

nah

[Traditional_Ale]

The one guy who brought his cell-phone camping because his stupid girlfriend didn't like camping but felt obligated to call him every 5 minutes to bitch about this and that eventually had it taken away and thrown in the river (or was it fire? I can't remember...).

While at first he was mad we chucked his $300 phone, when 10 minutes went by without a call we all started cheering and dancing and beer-bongin' it.

Moral of the story...if your girlfriend is a bitch, "forget" your phone when you go camping.

[MoneyGuy]

Did you mistake this site for dearabby.com? Seriously, no one here is as qualified as you are to make this decision. We don't know the lady. After this amount of time together, what does your head tell you? Only marry her if you're both ready and you're right for each other. There are enough divorces.

[Wookie]

Originally Posted by hulkrogan

I've decided I kill the grass on whatever side of the fence I'm on. I was in a very similar situation, 26 and wondering if this was it for me, would I ever be single again? It really bothered me to be honest. I wasn't sure if I was done with the whole single thing. Then thanks to some extremely Jerry Springer like events, I found myself single again. At first it obviously sucked, coming out of a long term relationship especially under completely messed up circumstances you never saw coming. Now however, being single is pretty awesome... mostly.

I went on a Flames trip to Florida with a bunch of guys (we do this every year) but I was always the one who was on his cell phone at 11pm letting her know I wasn't getting rebellion in the scrip club. This time it was so much more fun.

I went Euro Cup this June on a guys trip, all of us single, and it was amazing. I'd never been on a big trip like that with anyone but my girlfriend or family, and it was totally different. Don't get me wrong, both ways are good, but this was an experienced I had missed out on. Next week I'm headed to Oktoberfest with another single buddy. We'll probably get shut down the whole time by stuck up Euro chicks, but who cares, it will be so much fun.

Going to the bar is actually fun again, I don't have to worry about having a really busy schedule and not 'making time' for anyone.... life is great. Except for dating. Dating sucks and is way too much work. I'm amazed at the number of first dates you can go on without finding anyone worthy of a second. It's a waste of time and money, and I'm usually left wishing I had stayed home and played video games instead. Especially at 26, you see a lot of good girls who are married or with guys long term and really start to wonder about what selection is left. The good thing as a guy, is you'll always be able to go younger if need be. I think I have a good 10 years left to find a wife, and I'm in no rush... haha. I'm often pretty envious of my friends who have found good girls and locked them up, as they don't have to suffer through the dating crap and are getting them through their good years before they're old and wrinkly

I was going to try and convince you that being single sucked more than you think in this post (which is for sure true) but I think it's working out pretty well for me for now... haha. It'll be out of my system eventually though, and hopefully the dating scene picks up for me by then.

Great post!

Dating does suck. And is totally expensive. And totally time consuming. I think I could honestly have about 20 first dates this month. Wager my chances of liking any of them at about 5%, wager the chances of them liking me at about 60% and know that it'll be a headache to deal with all of this.

Yes staying at home is often the best choice, looking back at a few times yes, I should have just stayed at home.... But, the older you get, the more it seems.. I don't know.

For sure guys can totally date younger though. I'm working on a range of 22 - 27, MMMmmm 22.

That's impressive you've found a group of guys that are single. It's starts dwindling pretty quickly as the years go on. My friends do it up (mostly the married ones) once a year. It's the inbetween time that gets pretty dull.

[Traditional_Ale]

Originally Posted by Wookie

That's impressive you've found a group of guys that are single. It's starts dwindling pretty quickly as the years go on. My friends do it up (mostly the married ones) once a year. It's the inbetween time that gets pretty dull.

I know plenty of married couples who still party hard!

Its when you have kids....

[Grunt]

Wookie, Hulkrogan:

Everything you say is so true. I love being single too, but dating is such a pain in the ass. It's so hard to find someone you can actually handle being around. I'm 26, and the last girl I went on more than a few dates with was 21. Word of advice guys - don't date 21 year olds! Gah! Think back to when you were 21 and how naive and insecure about stupid things you might have been... then multiply it by 10 for a lot of girls and you have way, way too much trouble :P.

Also agreed on the 5% chance of liking them and 60% chance of them liking me part. I've been starting to wonder if them obviously liking me too early on actually turns me off of them. And the cost... good lord... I don't even want to think about how much I've spent in the last 6 months on dating. Ridiculous.

When my friends answer my calls and aren't jipping me on travel costs, they're all actually pretty good about getting together, though the group outings are less frequent. As others said, couples are a lot harder to get out. Strangely, I tend to go out with my coupled girl friends a lot more than the coupled guy friends... not sure why the girls are more available than the guys... just whipped I guess :P.

[BBQorMILDEW]

Originally Posted by MoneyGuy

Did you mistake this site for dearabby.com? Seriously, no one here is as qualified as you are to make this decision. We don't know the lady. After this amount of time together, what does your head tell you? Only marry her if you're both ready and you're right for each other. There are enough divorces.

I can respect what you are saying but I spend the majority of the time on this website.. This website is amazing I can have a discussion with random people about hockey as well as current events.. The majority of people on this website are within the 18-56 male demographic. So it's nice to get someone else's opinion on this type of stuff... It's also different being able to write on here without fear of too much judgement.

Obviously the decision is ultimately up to me, thanks for the input..

[Bill Bumface]

Originally Posted by fotze

That post now makes me want to be single just a bit.

You broke up with the girl in high school (still remembers BBS announcing here that you were dating a girl still in HS).

Haha, yeah, I broke up with her 4 years ago when I was 22 and she was 19

Originally Posted by Wookie

Wager my chances of liking any of them at about 5%, wager the chances of them liking me at about 60% and know that it'll be a headache to deal with all of this.

Sooooo true. It gets pretty annoying when you are getting several different "How are u?" text messages every day from girls that refuse to give up even though you have been ignoring them for some time.

That's impressive you've found a group of guys that are single. It's starts dwindling pretty quickly as the years go on. My friends do it up (mostly the married ones) once a year. It's the inbetween time that gets pretty dull.

I got really lucky in that at the same time I came out of my relationship I had a few friends come out of fairly long relationships at the same time. It got quite ridiculous for a little while when we were all fresh out.


We should form a CP single 26 year old alliance and have meets... haha.

[dustygoon]

Originally Posted by LIP MAN

Hookers and blow.

Pros and eights.

[Grunt]

Originally Posted by hulkrogan

Sooooo true. It gets pretty annoying when you are getting several different "How are u?" text messages every day from girls that refuse to give up even though you have been ignoring them for some time.

Annoyingly, by ignoring them they want you even more. But yeah, the awkwardness of dealing with the ones who just don't get it is pretty aggravating.

Originally Posted by hulkrogan

We should form a CP single 26 year old alliance and have meets... haha.

Count me in, haha.