08-12-2008, 11:19 PM
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#1
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Not a casual user
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: A simple man leading a complicated life....
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Man Almost Loses Penis Humping Steel Bench
From the WDF category 
Last night in Hong Kong, the police received a disturbing call from a man in trouble.
Xing, a 41 year-old man, was calling from LanTian park in the middle of the night. The lonely and disturbed man had apparently thought it would be fun to have sex with one of the steel sit-up benches around the park.
The bench has numerous small holes in it, which Xing used to attempt to satisfy himself. However, once he became aroused he found that he was stuck and could not get his penis out of the small hole.
http://www.weirdasianews.com/2008/08...g-steel-bench/
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08-12-2008, 11:26 PM
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#2
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One of the Nine
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I always thought fotze was a white guy from Calgary..?
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08-13-2008, 12:08 AM
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#3
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#1 Goaltender
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 4X4
I always thought fotze was a white guy from Calgary..?
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Who do you think was under the bench?
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08-13-2008, 12:11 AM
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#4
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Has Towel, Will Travel
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That should get him an honourable mention in this year's Darwin Awards.
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08-13-2008, 09:28 AM
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#5
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Calgary
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I read this article earlier in the week, and I have to wonder how small his erect penis is that he thought it would fit in one of the holes.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Grimbl420
I can wash my penis without taking my pants off.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Moneyhands23
If edmonton wins the cup in the next decade I will buy everyone on CP a bottle of vodka.
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08-13-2008, 09:34 AM
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#6
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 Posted the 6 millionth post! |
I'm a tall lanky white guy, mine would only get stuck in a metal fence.
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08-13-2008, 09:38 AM
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#7
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Franchise Player
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FireFly
I read this article earlier in the week, and I have to wonder how small his erect penis is that he thought it would fit in one of the holes.
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Funny...thats what I thought too! LOL
I also thought...geez we arent that far removed from dogs humping legs when it comes to getting ourselves off!
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08-13-2008, 09:49 AM
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#8
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It's not easy being green!
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: In the tubes to Vancouver Island
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Well he got it in there when he wasn't aroused.. what kept him aroused when he got it stuck?
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Who is in charge of this product and why haven't they been fired yet?
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08-13-2008, 10:01 AM
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#9
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First Line Centre
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pope04
Who do you think was under the bench?
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well played 
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08-13-2008, 10:39 AM
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#11
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Calgary
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Quote:
Originally Posted by troutman
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For those times that a Ball-peen hammer just won't do....
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Fireside Chat - The #1 Flames Fan Podcast - FiresideChat.ca
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08-13-2008, 11:13 AM
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#12
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Powerplay Quarterback
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This may come across as a bit crude but a hand just seems much more appealing than steel. Maybe that's just me though.
weird.
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08-13-2008, 12:30 PM
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#13
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Powerplay Quarterback
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Calgary
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Good to know... I guess I'll cross "Steel Bench with small holes" off my list... doesn't seem worth the risk anymore.
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08-13-2008, 12:51 PM
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#14
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: In my office, at the Ministry of Awesome!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kermitology
Well he got it in there when he wasn't aroused.. what kept him aroused when he got it stuck?
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A Sexy Bench!
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THE SHANTZ WILL RISE AGAIN.
 <-----Check the Badge bitches. You want some Awesome, you come to me!
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08-13-2008, 01:01 PM
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#15
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: 555 Saddledome Rise SE
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kermitology
Well he got it in there when he wasn't aroused.. what kept him aroused when he got it stuck?
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The pressure which caused the return flow of blood to be cut off.
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08-13-2008, 01:51 PM
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#16
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Lifetime Suspension
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ozy_Flame
I'm a tall lanky white guy, mine would only get stuck in a chicken wire fence.
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Fixed!
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08-13-2008, 02:18 PM
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#17
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#1 Goaltender
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Halifax
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 4X4
I always thought fotze was a white guy from Calgary..?
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Oh man...solid gold. no point in reading the rest of the thread
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08-13-2008, 03:08 PM
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#18
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Scoring Winger
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Sec. 222
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dion
From the WDF category
Last night in Hong Kong, the police received a disturbing call from a man in trouble.
Xing, a 41 year-old man, was calling from LanTian park in the middle of the night. The lonely and disturbed man had apparently thought it would be fun to have sex with one of the steel sit-up benches around the park.
The bench has numerous small holes in it, which Xing used to attempt to satisfy himself. However, once he became aroused he found that he was stuck and could not get his penis out of the small hole. |
Did anyone else find this line hilarious?
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"I'd wish you good luck tonight but I hate the Oilers" - Me to MacTavish in the elevator at the Sheraton Hotel on New Years
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08-13-2008, 08:03 PM
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#19
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First Line Centre
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Calgary
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dion
From the WDF category
Last night in Hong Kong, the police received a disturbing call from a man in trouble. |
How much you wanna bet his cellphone call log shows 1-900-HOT-BABE right before 9-1-1.
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08-13-2008, 08:58 PM
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#20
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Not a casual user
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: A simple man leading a complicated life....
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Quote:
Originally Posted by First Lady
How much you wanna bet his cellphone call log shows 1-900-HOT-BABE right before 9-1-1.
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With pictures to arouse him too 
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