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Old 06-17-2008, 03:40 AM   #81
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Good thread!

My story comes from grad school--though it was a year or two before I got to Iowa, it had become legendary by the time I arrived.

A fellow was giving a presentation in a first year grad-level class on a reading that had been assigned--a common practice in grad school. His presentation went into all kinds of detail about the "Shemallay" tribe of Native Americans that was referenced in the piece, and how they had all of these strange cultural practices when it came to gender. The Shemallays, he explained, didn't cotton to Western gender norms, had their own ideas about how to behave, dress, have sex and so on. He went on and on about the Shemallay people's culture, practices and their implications to the class as a whole.

After he'd been going on for a while the professor interrupted him and said "you do know that it's "she-male"--right?" As in cross-dressers, not some Native American tribe that he made up.

In grad school that counts as an epic fail, I think.
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Old 06-17-2008, 03:44 AM   #82
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Well I don't know if I want to send the thread in this direction but ..

I was dating a girl who was very well acquainted with my ex-girlfriend. I'd call them friends but they also hated each other in a strange fashion. Their names also happen to be extremely similar -- they start and end with the same sound and only one consonant in the middle is different.

I'm sure you can fill in the rest.
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Old 06-17-2008, 09:48 AM   #83
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nm

Last edited by West Karma; 03-15-2013 at 12:21 PM.
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Old 06-17-2008, 10:22 AM   #84
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I thought "Our lips are sealed" by the Go Go's was "My name is Cecil" when I was younger....
WHen Peter Gabriel's backup singers sing in French on Games Without Frontiers, I thought they said, "She's So Popular" instaed of jeux sans frontiers.
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Old 06-17-2008, 10:26 AM   #85
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lol. so did I.
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Old 06-17-2008, 10:30 AM   #86
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Company BBQ a few years back sitting around drinking some beers and looking up at the night sky - girl I worked with, really nice girl and great at her job but not too swift.

Anyhoo she's looking up at the stars and turns to me and says

"so...do you believe in UFOs and Dinosaurs and stuff".

I'm quite proud of the fact I didn't laugh at her, and instead just informed her that they had managed to find a lot of evidence that Dinosaurs did indeed exist in the past.

I've also regularly wondered what she meant by "and stuff" considering the fact she included Dinosaurs.
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Old 06-17-2008, 10:42 AM   #87
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I've also regularly wondered what she meant by "and stuff" considering the fact she included Dinosaurs.
Other make-believe things like vampires, elves, gremlins, and eskimos.
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Old 06-17-2008, 10:57 AM   #88
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Other make-believe things like vampires, elves, gremlins, and eskimos.
Wait a sec.....

...

Vampires aren't real?
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Old 06-17-2008, 11:30 AM   #89
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We were playing a slo-pitch near the airport. While we were in the field a large Hercules plane was taking off. My buddy yells from the outfield "Look at that big tub of s*&T!". He didn't realize that the largest girl from the other team had just walked up to the plate.... she definitely heard him.
Oh my gosh, that is so awful, but I could not help laughing out loud.
At work no less.
Better stop reading this and get back to work
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Old 06-17-2008, 01:59 PM   #90
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One day, during the three weeks I did blackberry support because nobody else could, I received a message on my blackberry from a known trouble maker of a user... "Hey, I won't be coming into the office on Monday. I think I got this issue [with the blackberry] figured out. Fixed it faster than those morons would have anyway."

I realized right away that myself, and the IT department were the "morons" in question, and that he sent that message to the wrong number.

I replied to his message with a simple "I'm glad to hear you got your issue fixed. In the future, however, please ensure that you are sending messages to your intended recipient, thanks."

About 5 minutes later, I got a call from said user where he tripped over himself trying to create any excuse he can think of for why his message was worded the way it was.

He left the company within three weeks of that.
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Old 06-17-2008, 02:11 PM   #91
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Heh, I have a similar story to that. Don't really want to get into it but the moral is when you are on a conference call make sure before you insult the people you are on the call with that they have actually hung up after they say goodbye. Some tool insulted my boss as we were about to hang up and it was a lot of fun hearing my boss go up one side of him and down the other.
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Old 06-17-2008, 02:22 PM   #92
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Heh, I have a similar story to that. Don't really want to get into it but the moral is when you are on a conference call make sure before you insult the people you are on the call with that they have actually hung up after they say goodbye. Some tool insulted my boss as we were about to hang up and it was a lot of fun hearing my boss go up one side of him and down the other.

The reason the first button to go on any of my cell phones is because after I'm done talking, I hit the end button incessantly. Like a nervous twitch.

I developed this fear of faulty end buttons after a guy I worked with told me that the day before, he was riding with a buddy who received a call from his wife informing him of her plans to go out that night without him. After they finished talking, he put his phone in the tray on the dash. He proceeded to lament how he thought that she was cheating on him, but that it didn't matter because he was cheating on her.

About 5 minutes later he grabbed the phone to make a call and realized that not only had he not hung up, neither had she and she heard every word he had said.
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Old 06-17-2008, 04:13 PM   #93
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When I worked at Burger King in high school, this guy came in and wanted a whopper combo. He didn't say what kind of drink he wanted, so when that happens we are supposed to assume they want coke. So, I asked to make sure that's what he wanted, except I said, "Did you want c**k with that?" I turned all different shades of red and actually got in a little trouble with my manager.
what was on your mind?
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Old 06-17-2008, 04:20 PM   #94
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what was on your mind?
Oh, you know, the usual...




Not sure if this fits in this thread, but today, I conducted an interview with this young chap, straight out of university, and he was really nervous, visibly nervous. He was squirming in his chair, rarely made eye contact, he just stared at the floor or out the window behind me.

Anyways, I asked him some basic questions and he was very blunt and honest with his answers, I think moreso than he intended. He told me about how he had trouble meeting deadlines in school, had trouble getting up in the morning, how he didn't like working with people, and how he wasn't comfortable using computers or phones.

I imagine he was just really nervous and therefore some of that stuff just slipped out, so I am sure that he walked out of that interview thinking, "Did I just say all that?"
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Old 06-17-2008, 04:24 PM   #95
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He told me about how he had trouble meeting deadlines in school, had trouble getting up in the morning, how he didn't like working with people, and how he wasn't comfortable using computers or phones.
At which point you should have stood up, shook his hand and said "Welcome aboard. I'm sure you'll love it here at Telus."

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Old 06-17-2008, 04:28 PM   #96
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That is hilarious. One time my friend said that the beeping sounds at a crosswalk intersection are for the deaf. My sister in law thought they killed sheep for the wool to make her sweater. A guy asked me once how they grow spaghetti.
Their not? What is the beeping for?
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Old 06-17-2008, 04:39 PM   #97
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Oh, you know, the usual...




Not sure if this fits in this thread, but today, I conducted an interview with this young chap, straight out of university, and he was really nervous, visibly nervous. He was squirming in his chair, rarely made eye contact, he just stared at the floor or out the window behind me.

Anyways, I asked him some basic questions and he was very blunt and honest with his answers, I think moreso than he intended. He told me about how he had trouble meeting deadlines in school, had trouble getting up in the morning, how he didn't like working with people, and how he wasn't comfortable using computers or phones.

I imagine he was just really nervous and therefore some of that stuff just slipped out, so I am sure that he walked out of that interview thinking, "Did I just say all that?"
Was his name H. Simpson by chance?

"I'm a slow learner, I'm always late, and I sleep on the job."

--when asked for his qualifications for employment at the power plant.
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Old 06-17-2008, 05:45 PM   #98
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Anyways, I asked him some basic questions and he was very blunt and honest with his answers, I think moreso than he intended. He told me about how he had trouble meeting deadlines in school, had trouble getting up in the morning, how he didn't like working with people, and how he wasn't comfortable using computers or phones.
Ha, speaking of interviews. Last year, when i was interviewing candidates for a design position at my magazine, one girl comes to mind. I asked her what she thought about our mag....she started giving me all these reasons why she loved it, started mentioning particular articles, and then proceeded to pull out a few issues from her bag and flipping through her favorite pages. I let her go a little longer, but i eventually had to let her know that she was talking about and showing me a totally different publication than the one she was applying for. The magazines do sound similar, but anyone who does even the tiniest bit of research online would have known the difference....especially someone who was supposed to be visually accute.

Needles to say, she didn't get the job.
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Old 06-17-2008, 06:40 PM   #99
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Ha, speaking of interviews. Last year, when i was interviewing candidates for a design position at my magazine, one girl comes to mind. I asked her what she thought about our mag....she started giving me all these reasons why she loved it, started mentioning particular articles, and then proceeded to pull out a few issues from her bag and flipping through her favorite pages. I let her go a little longer, but i eventually had to let her know that she was talking about and showing me a totally different publication than the one she was applying for. The magazines do sound similar, but anyone who does even the tiniest bit of research online would have known the difference....especially someone who was supposed to be visually accute.

Needles to say, she didn't get the job.
Oh, mother, that's awful. Yeah, that's not something from which you can recover. If I may ask, how did she react when you told her that it was a different publication? Did she run out of the room sobbing? I probably would have run out of the room sobbing. I was never that great in interviews...
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Old 06-17-2008, 06:46 PM   #100
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Their not? What is the beeping for?
HINT: the deaf can't hear the beeping.
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