Alberta women cross-border shopping for men

[FireFly]

Originally Posted by Cowboy89

Very true, but it doesn't change want or desire in the looks department. Women trade in looks for other qualities more readily than men, however that's not to say that men don't negotiate with looks as well. Just not to the same degree as women. You could change every ad on TV that uses a female model and replace them with models used in those dove commercials and I don't think you'd see a remarkable difference in the average man's appearance expectations. If a man's too unrealistic about appearance expectations then he'll be going without for a long time until his expectations match the reality of his own physical environment. I believe that once someone's been around the block a few times they have a pretty good guage of what to expect.

See, and here I thought I was looking for just above average men, considering myself to be the same. What you're telling me, is that clearly my expectations are unreasonable and I need to start hitting on ugly guys. After all, I've been single for 3 years, so my expectations MUST be unrealistic.

I can't wait for baseball next Thursday.

[Eastern Girl]

I would think the grocery store option could be a good way to meet women. I know when I go into a bar, I am on guard, thinking every guy in there is a dirtbag only after one thing (and they probably are). Whereas, in a grocery store, I am not going to be as defensive if a guy were to approach me. Although, on the other side of the coin, I would probably not pick up on whether a guy was interested in me. I would probably just assume he wanted help picking out fruit and that is it, so it may be harder to get a read on whether a girl is interested in you based on that approach.

As for the single issue, I've been single for awhile and it has nothing to do with location. I know a large part of it is because I am cripplingly shy. I probably give out a very strong "please stay away" vibe, I am not sure why a guy would ever approach me, based on said vibe.

[Eastern Girl]

Originally Posted by mykalberta

The default answer for that question is and always has been money.

That's not fair. You guys get all hot under the collar when a woman makes a generalization about men, but then go on to make rather large sweeping generalizations about women.

[Hack&Lube]

I also think it's unfair to blame media, etc. There are tons of scholarly scientific studies that just show that in terms of average first appeal, men go for looks (at the potential expense of all other traits) and women also go for looks but will prioritize for personality/social status over that. It's not about lower standards that one sex has over the other. It's just that they prioritize different things. It's genetic. Men don't need to see a pretty girl on TV to know what they want or what they would be satisfied with. It's in-built.

I've seen plenty of "non-matching" attractive girls with average guys and attractive guys with average girls. It's all about where you place yourself on your personal scale. What league do you rate yourself as playing in, etc.

[Dion]

Originally Posted by FireFly

How often do you see a guy with a hot chick and think "how did he score that?" Likewise, do you EVER see a hot guy with an average girl? Just doesn't happen.

It does happen.

A good friend of mine is living proof that it does happen. He didn't marry some "hot" gal. To some, personality, morals, values and interests are more important.

I'm much the same way. Looks are NOT the most important aspect. Personality, morals, values and interests are more important too me also.

Keep looking, you'll find the right guy soon enough.

[Hack&Lube]

Originally Posted by Eastern Girl

That's not fair. You guys get all hot under the collar when a woman makes a generalization about men, but then go on to make rather large sweeping generalizations about women.

I don't really recall men ever having the issue about women generalizing them It's pretty simple and difficult to hide.

I think the complaint is about the typical "I want a nice guy" when it seems to be the opposite in many cases from men's point of view. Of course, men don't care about this sticking point of the girl is not pretty in the first place.

[Cowboy89]

Originally Posted by FireFly

See, and here I thought I was looking for just above average men, considering myself to be the same. What you're telling me, is that clearly my expectations are unreasonable and I need to start hitting on ugly guys. After all, I've been single for 3 years, so my expectations MUST be unrealistic.

I can't wait for baseball next Thursday.

It could also be in the marketing. You've announced that you're single and looking on CP, but have you maxed out other avenues?

Also sometimes it's also in the way you market yourself. Going back to the real estate example, a lot of the time a house that has been on the market for months doesn't sell when other comparable houses sell much sooner. In other words when something's been on the market for a long time, even if there's absolutely nothing wrong with it there's an assumption among buyers that there must be something wrong with it because no one else has snapped it up in quite some time. Even if they want to buy, why put an offer on the house now when based on history it most likely would still be available after they have time to find a better deal?

[Eastern Girl]

Originally Posted by Hack&Lube

I don't really recall men ever having the issue about women generalizing them It's pretty simple and difficult to hide.

I think the complaint is about the typical "I want a nice guy" when it seems to be the opposite in many cases from men's point of view.

I don't think it is the opposite. I think women sometimes end up with those loser type guys because those guys are good at keeping up the nice guy front. I guess it just takes some women some time to see through their crap. Perhaps that's where the confusion comes in for men.

And for the record, I think women do want a nice guy, just one with a naughty streak in him, at least that is what I want.

[CaptainCrunch]

Originally Posted by mykalberta

For me a grocery store is alot easier and safer than a bar. Admittedly dont go there jsut to to pick women up, cause thats kid of creepy.

You just have to spend alot more time in the Fruit and Veg section than normal. And play dumb by asking them what that is when they pick it up - like some weird looking fruit of veg (or ask about how to tell if a watermellon etc is ripe or not) - that is your in for a introduction, from there you should be able to tell if she is into you or not by the inflection in her voice. Then dont waste much time to see if she wants to do something non datey but enough you will be able to figure out if she is crazy or not. I also find it alot better for first impressions as you can see what girls are fake and not by the way they dress for grocery shopping. The only real negative is you can sometimes get the wolf pack issue if they have roomates etc, that is a bit more difficult to navigate.

Also, I have found paper and pen to be more conducive to a positive response then taking info on a PDA or phone. No empirical evidence just my expiernce has been alot more positive with the paper way of doing things.

Keep in mind, I dont know alot of people in this City outside of work, the grocery store angle is usually the only option so I have worked at it alot being in this city almost 5 years, with the exception of the around work area +15/food courts which are alot harder to negotiate and for myself dont have near the success % as grocery stores.

Now do you ask her how she picks her cucumbers before or after she gives you a phone number.

[FireFly]

Originally Posted by Cowboy89

It could also be in the marketing. You've announced that you're single and looking on CP, but have you maxed out other avenues?

Also sometimes it's also in the way you market yourself. Going back to the real estate example, a lot of the time a house that has been on the market for months doesn't sell when other comparable houses sell much sooner. In other words when something's been on the market for a long time, even if there's absolutely nothing wrong with it there's an assumption among buyers that there must be something wrong with it because no one else has snapped it up in quite some time. Even if they want to buy, why put an offer on the house now when based on history it most likely would still be available after they have time to find a better deal?

So I need to claim to be a new listing? Then aren't people concerned about rebound potential?

[Cowboy89]

Originally Posted by Eastern Girl

I don't think it is the opposite. I think women sometimes end up with those loser type guys because those guys are good at keeping up the nice guy front. I guess it just takes some women some time to see through their crap. Perhaps that's where the confusion comes in for men.

And for the record, I think women do want a nice guy, just one with a naughty streak in him, at least that is what I want.

Marketing firms stopped using customer comments as the sole basis of a marketing strategy a long time ago. Why? Because what someone holds up as their ideal want in public, isn't necessarily what they're most likely to buy. It's like Spice Girls music. Very few people admit to ever liking their music or buying their CDs, but yet they clearly sold millions of them.

[troutman]

Originally Posted by browna

Yvonne should do it the Dar way (for shame, 4 pages of the most famous cross border slu..t...I mean shopper, yet no reference to her), ride her bike along the river in Great Falls and end up in Vegas.

I forgot about Dar. How are they all doing?

[Ozy_Flame]

Originally Posted by Tron_fdc

Interesting. How does one approach a girl in the grocery store? I've heard of this approach, but I've never done it or seen it in action.

I think I need an approach other than clubbing girls ovr the head and dragging them back to my cave.

Read my article. It may help you out.

http://ca.askmen.com/love/player_200...ove_games.html

Not that I'm promoting myself or anything....

[Eastern Girl]

Originally Posted by Cowboy89

It could also be in the marketing. You've announced that you're single and looking on CP, but have you maxed out other avenues?

Also sometimes it's also in the way you market yourself. Going back to the real estate example, a lot of the time a house that has been on the market for months doesn't sell when other comparable houses sell much sooner. In other words when something's been on the market for a long time, even if there's absolutely nothing wrong with it there's an assumption among buyers that there must be something wrong with it because no one else has snapped it up in quite some time. Even if they want to buy, why put an offer on the house now when based on history it most likely would still be available after they have time to find a better deal?

I love these real estate examples.

So, in a bar scenario, a guy can just sense that a girl has been on the market a long while and therefore assumes she is flawed in some way?

[troutman]

Originally Posted by Eastern Girl

And for the record, I think women do want a nice guy, just one with a naughty streak in him, at least that is what I want.

Define "naughty". 5,000 words minimum.

[Cowboy89]

Originally Posted by FireFly

So I need to claim to be a new listing? Then aren't people concerned about rebound potential?

No just don't talk about how long and if asked (which is a very neurotic question for a guy to ask anyway) be very vauge.

[Dion]

http://www.howtofindmrright.com/

[Cowboy89]

Originally Posted by Eastern Girl

I love these real estate examples.

So, in a bar scenario, a guy can just sense that a girl has been on the market a long while and therefore assumes she is flawed in some way?

Yep. Either the looks simply don't cut it and therefore that assumptions is automatically made or if they've seen her around the bar for a couple of hours or on multiple nights and don't recall seeing any suitors competing. It's amazing what a little "scarcity" (percieved or real) can do to a situation.

[Ozy_Flame]

I agree about the naughty thing. I'm a complete gentleman and chival guy by heart, but every now and then I get a filthy mouth and in a naughty frame mind. She loves it, and this is what leads to sex in public lol.....

[Dan02]

Originally Posted by Eastern Girl

That's not fair. You guys get all hot under the collar when a woman makes a generalization about men, but then go on to make rather large sweeping generalizations about women.

I thought he comment was more a sweeping generalization of those men, who pretty much have nothing else to offer othe then moola.