Fundies say the darndest things!

[Slava]

Some of these are not safe for work (text only). Quite frankly some of these are hilarous no matter whether you are a believer or an atheist!

http://www.fstdt.com/fundies/top100.aspx?archive=1

[burn_this_city]

Some of these people are so militant its scary.. "The only good Athiest is a dead one" Wow..

[FlamesAllTheWay]

"Evolution says that we started out simple, and over time became more complex. That just isn't possible: UNLESS there is a giant outside source of energy supplying the Earth with huge amounts of energy. If there were such a source, scientists would certainly know about it."

"I can sum it all up in three words: Evolution is a lie"

"The only thing I don't like about them is they sell foreign language versions of the [Bible]. I don't think that's right. We know the only true translation is the 1600's version in English."

"You are banned. You are not a Christian for Christians don't accuse brothers and sisters in Christ of being non-Christian."



I think the first one is one of the funniest things I have ever read... the bold font makes it even better.

[getbak]

"I am a bit troubled. I believe my son has a girlfriend, because she left a dirty magazine with men in it under his bed. My son is only 16 and I really don't think he's ready to date yet. What's worse is that he's sneaking some girl to his room behind my back. I need help, God! I want my son to stop being so secretive!"

I have a feeling she'll be even more troubled when she discovers that her son doesn't (and never will) have a girlfriend.


"Masturbation can sometimes be wrong and it can sometimes not. If you masturbate thinking about how pretty the flowers are and how you want a puppy, essentially that's not wrong. But most times, that is not the case. I believe that when one masturbates a high percentage of the time they are fantasizing about a sexual partner therefore making masturbation lust. Lust, as the Bible states, is a sin. But masturbation is something that people in general should stay away from because it's hard not to lust whilst doing it."

Mmmm, flowers. Pretty, pretty flowers.

[Slava]

getbak, these are the exact two favorites of mine (out of so many choices!). That top quote is just hilarious!!

[Cheese]

Athiests as a Majority

This is what it would be like, if the majority of people were athiests.
ATHIEST KID: Mom, I'm going to go fark a hooker.
ATHIEST MOM: Okay, son.
ATHIEST KID: Afterwards, I'm going to go smoke pot with my friends, since it's "not addictive."
ATHIEST MOM: Okay, come home soon!

The athiest kid leaves the room. The father comes home from work several minutes later.

ATHIEST DAD: Hey!
ATHIEST MOM: Hi, honey! I'm pregnant again. I guess I'll just get another abortion, since "fetuses don't count as human life."
ATHIEST DAD: Okay, get as many abortions as you want!
ATHIEST MOM: Oh, and don't go in the bedroom.
ATHIEST DAD: Why not?
ATHIEST MOM: There are two gay men farking each other in there.
ATHIEST DAD: Why are they here?
ATHIEST MOM: I wanted to watch them do it for awhile. They just aren't finished yet.
ATHIEST DAD: Okay, that's fine with me!

Suddenly, their neighbor runs into the house.

ATHIEST NEIGHBOR: Come quick, there's a Christian outside!
ATHIEST MOM: We'll be right there!

The athiest couple quickly put on a pair of black robes and hoods. They then exit the house, and run into the street, where a Christian is nailed to a large, wooden X. He is being burned alive. A crowd of athiests stand around him, all wearing black robes and hoods.

RANDOM ATHIEST: Damn you, Christian! We hate you! We claim to be tolerant of all religions. But we really hate your's! That's because we athiests are hypocritical like that! Die, Christian!

THE END


LOL...well thats what Ive been doing all these years!!

[Thor]

Good Ole Pat, count on him for such quality stuff:

Just like what Nazi Germany did to the Jews, so liberal America is now doing to the evangelical Christians. It's no different. It is the same thing. It is happening all over again. It is the Democratic Congress, the liberal-based media and the homosexuals who want to destroy the Christians. Wholesale abuse and discrimination and the worst bigotry directed toward any group in America today. More terrible than anything suffered by any minority in history. Pat Robertson, Quotes From the Religious Right [Comments (233)] [2007-Nov-09]

[Azure]

Nazi Germany, ah, ummm, killed the Jews?

How can you even make that comparison?

[driveway]

[MarchHare]

If your original Hebrew disagrees with my original King James --- your original Hebrew is wrong.

I'm reminded of an Einstein quotation when I read something as foolish as the above: "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe."

[Thor]

Originally Posted by driveway

LOL that is a keeper

[LChoy]

Most of these quotes our from Christian sites, so I guess that's expected based on the type of people that go on those sites. However, if these comments and sentiments were on more public forums and venues, then I'll be very concerned about the state of our neighbours down south

[evman150]

Originally Posted by lchoy

Most of these quotes our from Christian sites, so I guess that's expected based on the type of people that go on those sites. However, if these comments and sentiments were on more public forums and venues, then I'll be very concerned about the state of our neighbours down south

I don't get it.

The people exist either way.

?