How do I get out of the "Friend Zone?" Help!!!

[Got Miikka?]

Originally Posted by arloiginla

If she comes back and shows interest, then I get to say no, mean it, and laugh all the way to the revenge bank.

This is exactly what I suggested on page one of this thread and a bunch of people called me a jerk. Clearly we're all jerks. But that's OK.

[burn_this_city]

I better get a proper curtain for my window..

[CaptainCrunch]

Originally Posted by J pold

What?! Why that would be the worst thing you could do

That has “begging puppy dog" written all over it

*THINGS TO NEVER ASK GIRLS*

“Are you sure?”

“What’s wrong?”

“Is everything alright?”

EDIT: Upon further review of your post I detect a sense of sarcasm

To add on,

Don't ask her if you were good, or if it was good for her, or if she climbed the perverbial mountain.

Of course it was good, for me, I climbed the mountain and all that stuff, she was just along for the ride.

As far as whipping it out at the dinner table, yeah the only thing that gets you is banned from some pretty good restaurants, and a nasty restraining order.

And she's not going to change her mind if your brave enough to whip out your member for the world to see, two things are going to happen. The first one probably involves a night in jail and a case of vicious sodomitis. The second involves her brother or father or ex special benefits boy friend who tapped that before you, running you down with their car, then beating you half to death with whatevers handy.

Honestly

Guys and girls can not be friends if there is any sexual tension one sided or two, cause friends with benefits has a short term, and moving out of the friend ship zone just don't happen.

You took a run at it, good for you, but your always going to look at her with different intentions especially when your drinking and one night your going to make the drunken face book call. You don't mean to, but its the nature of the beast.

Cut and run, don't be there as her 99th options so that she can feel good and attractive as gravity pulls her breasts past her knee's and her hips spread like warm butter on a hot day, and then when she's old and unattractive she might let you out of the friendship zone during a valium fueled heated game of bingo, because her last 98 husbands and boyfriends are long dead or long gone and your the only one that finds her attractive.

Sure in two or three years, you'll see her in the mall pushing around three kids while her fat husband chomps down on some chew and looks at the latest edition of camel toe magazine, and she looks like she's gained ten years.

Then you'll have that last laugh.

Revenge might take time, but it tastes mighty fine.

[Ozy_Flame]

Originally Posted by FireFly

It's probably because those who've tried this technique have all been laughed at in public. I mean really, do you think I'd get all hot and bothered by a limp dick? I've only ever seen one that made me think "I bet that's huge when erect".

Who says it has to be limp? Get the ol' boy ready for work, then make sure you plant it in a hot dog bun. Sauerkraut on the side, please!

(Of course this doesn't work, but I say if someone actually does it, he better go all out!)

[rubecube]

Originally Posted by Ozy_Flame

Who says it has to be limp? Get the ol' boy ready for work, then make sure you plant it in a hot dog bun. Sauerkraut on the side, please!

(Of course this doesn't work, but I say if someone actually does it, he better go all out!)

"There's no meat in my sandwich!"

[FireFly]

Originally Posted by Ozy_Flame

Who says it has to be limp? Get the ol' boy ready for work, then make sure you plant it in a hot dog bun. Sauerkraut on the side, please!

(Of course this doesn't work, but I say if someone actually does it, he better go all out!)

So let's get this straight here. You're having a conversation with a female and she tells you she doesn't want you. The idea is that your immediate reaction is to flop your weiner on the table... So then, if it's not limp, either you've been "getting it ready" during the conversation (masturbating at a restaurant?) or you can immediately get hard.

If it's the first option, you're a perv, and that clearly won't work. If it's the second option... How YOU doin?

[CaptainCrunch]

Originally Posted by FireFly

So let's get this straight here. You're having a conversation with a female and she tells you she doesn't want you. The idea is that your immediate reaction is to flop your weiner on the table... So then, if it's not limp, either you've been "getting it ready" during the conversation (masturbating at a restaurant?) or you can immediately get hard.

If it's the first option, you're a perv, and that clearly won't work. If it's the second option... How YOU doin?

You have to work to get it to the aforementioned second state.

News to me.

Ozy_Flame we dub thee floppy.

[Cowboy89]

Originally Posted by FireFly

If it's the first option, you're a perv, and that clearly won't work. If it's the second option... How YOU doin?

Be sure to run some tests for performance enhancing drugs first!

[CaptainCrunch]

Originally Posted by Cowboy89

Be sure to run some tests for performance enhancing drugs first!

Thats not a vitamin pill.

[Bring_Back_Shantz]

Originally Posted by FireFly

So let's get this straight here. You're having a conversation with a female and she tells you she doesn't want you. The idea is that your immediate reaction is to flop your weiner on the table... So then, if it's not limp, either you've been "getting it ready" during the conversation (masturbating at a restaurant?) or you can immediately get hard.

If it's the first option, you're a perv, and that clearly won't work. If it's the second option... How YOU doin?

HA! I knew chicks didn't care about foreplay either. It's just been a scam all along.

[FireFly]

Originally Posted by Bring_Back_Shantz

HA! I knew chicks didn't care about foreplay either. It's just been a scam all along.

We care about foreplay when you're performing it on us... If I don't have to hurt my jaw, I won't.

Seriously though, I LOVE foreplay, however, that would be an excellent skill to have as quickies are also good.

[rubecube]

Originally Posted by FireFly

We care about foreplay when you're performing it on us... If I don't have to hurt my jaw, I won't.

Seriously though, I LOVE foreplay, however, that would be an excellent skill to have as quickies are also good.

How are you single?

[Bring_Back_Shantz]

Originally Posted by FireFly

We care about foreplay when you're performing it on us... If I don't have to hurt my jaw, I won't.

Seriously though, I LOVE foreplay, however, that would be an excellent skill to have as quickies are also good.

Pffffft this is such crap, more double standards all the time.

We let you vote,
We let you drive,
We pay for dinner and hold the door,
and we still let you off sinking ships first,
and now this?
What's next, equal pay for equal work?

Edit: Also, just to clarify, the highlighted part isn't foreplay, it's more of a "Viable alternative".

[FireFly]

Originally Posted by rubecube

How are you single?

I don't know. Men are idiots? Can't see a good thing when she's on her knees in front of them....

[Bring_Back_Shantz]

Originally Posted by FireFly

I don't know. Men are idiots? Can't see a good thing when she's on her knees in front of them....

Forget "How are you single?",
with comments like that, how have you not ammased an army of dedicated stalkers?

[Matata]

Originally Posted by Bring_Back_Shantz

Pffffft this is such crap, more double standards all the time.

We let you vote,
We let you drive,
We pay for dinner and hold the door,
and we still let you off sinking ships first,
and now this?
What's next, equal pay for equal work?

Edit: Also, just to clarify, the highlighted part isn't foreplay, it's more of a "Viable alternative".

If it makes you feel better, the womens movement has benifited men more than women. Women now face tons of stress and societal pressure to be hot, successful career, wife and mother. Men on the other hand, have had the burden of society lifted from their shoulders and can now act like teenagers untill we're 30, thanks toots.

[4X4]

Originally Posted by Matata

Men on the other hand, have had the burden of society lifted from their shoulders and can now act like teenagers untill we're 30, thanks toots.

Very well done.

[rubecube]

Originally Posted by Bring_Back_Shantz

Forget "How are you single?",
with comments like that, how have you not ammased an army of dedicated stalkers?

"You meet some interesting people in the bushes."

[FireFly]

Originally Posted by Matata

If it makes you feel better, the womens movement has benifited men more than women. Women now face tons of stress and societal pressure to be hot, successful career, wife and mother. Men on the other hand, have had the burden of society lifted from their shoulders and can now act like teenagers untill we're 30, thanks toots.

Yeah. That's why men are now spending more than ever on grooming and little blue pills. I'm not quite sure how it benefits you when your woman constantly has a headache, but if you enjoy a life without sex, more power to you... Sure, go ahead and act like a teenager until you're 30. Meanwhile every girl you've ever had sex with is laughing at your penis size. Why? Because the sexual revolution has allowed us to discuss sex more freely.

Come to think of it, that might be why I'm single... Sure I love sex, but I'm kind of a bitch.

[Resolute 14]

If we end up with two CP softball teams, I wanna be on FireFly's team...