"Cheesey" Jokes that still make you laugh...

[Maritime Q-Scout]

Man it's raining cats and dogs outside... on my way in I stepped in a poodle

[Dion]

Did you hear about the clumsy lens grinder?
He fell into the lens grinding machine and made a spectacle of himself.

Two cannibals are eating a clown. One turns to the other and says "This tastes funny".

Knock knock
Who's there?
Tiajuana
Tiajuana who?
Tiajuana hear another knock knock joke?

And what do you call a sleeping cow?
A bull dozer.

Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
He was feeling crumby.

[Bertuzzied]

Knock knock.
Who's there?
Boo
Boo Who?
Don't cry it's ony a knock knock joke.

hmmm from 1988.

What does steroids and Hurricane Gilbert have in common?
They both make Jamaicans run fast.
hehe. I cheetah all the time.

[Super-Rye]

Why was the orange kicked out of school?

Because he couldn't concentrate.

[Devils'Advocate]

A tattered and twisted string walks into a bar.
Bartender says "Are you a string? I don't serve strings!"
String replies, "No, I'm a frayed knot!"

[calf]

Originally Posted by firebug

Don't even let me get started on my man with no arms and no legs jokes.

What do you call 2 men with no arms & no legs hanging from the side of a window?

Kurt 'n Rod

Originally Posted by ken0042

What do you call a cow that has had an abortion?

Decaffinated.

[the_only_turek_fan]

When two people are talking and a third person interupts, I still laugh when one of the people having the orignal conversation says "This is an A-B conversation, why don't you C yourself out."

[Cheese]

What do you call to Scottish Gay guys?

Patrick Fitzgerald and Gerald Fitzpatrick!

[Seabass]

A wife and a husband walk into a psychiatrists office. The wife says "Doctor, you have to help us, my husband thinks he's a dog." The doctor looks at the husband and says, "OK have a seat on the couch". The wife replies "He's not allowed on the couch"

[FireFly]

What'd the banana say to the vibrator?

What the heck you shakin for? She's gonna eat me!

[WesternCanadaKing]

Two my brother told me years ago, they still make me chuckle thinking about them.

Two sausages are lieing in a frying pan. One says to the other "Holy crap its hot in here!" and the other says "HOLY SH*T A TALKING SAUSAGE!"

Whats big, red, and eats rocks?
A big red rock eater!

[pope04]

Originally Posted by Cowperson

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs.......

..................in a hole?

Phil.

..................in your swimming pool?

Bob.

...................waterskiiing?


Skip.

[tussery]

What do you find in a cannibal's shower?

Head and shoulders.

[killer_carlson]

this was my first ever joke:

what did the skeleton say when he fell in the swamp?

I'm soaked to the bone

[Displaced Flames fan]

Can't believe nobody mentioned this gem, and I chuckle every time....

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?"

This next one made me wet my pants when I was about 10. My late cousin told it to me in his goofy way which is part of the appeal...the first line is so ridiculous to get the thing set up...kills me....here goes...

There once was an Indian chief who wanted to fart.
He sent his best brave to town to get some beans.
The brave walked into the store and said, "Big Chief, No Fart...give me can of beans"

The next day the brave entered the store again..."Big Chief no fart, give me barrell of beans"

On the third day the brave entered the store again, "Big Chief, no fart need wagon of beans."

A week later the brave entered the store again and said, "Big fart, no chief"

[Hemi-Cuda]

what do you call a cross between an elephant and a rhinoceros?

Elephino

----------------------

two Mexicans are walking in the desert, starving to death. one spots something shimmering in the distance

"Hey Jose, eets a bacon tree! weer saved!

they start running towards the bacon tree when all of a sudden gunshots ring out and they dive to the ground

"Pueblo that's no bacon tree, eets a hambush!"

[Magnum PEI]

What do you call an abortion in Prague?
A cancelled Czech.

[czure32]

dont really make me laugh, but they are pretty cheesy

how many toronto maple leaf's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
1 to hold it in place and the world will revolve around him

how many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb?
none they will just sit in the dark and cry about it

[Hack&Lube]

A man walks into a bar.

[Dion]

Dear Friend,

The other day I went up to a local Christian bookstore and saw a "honk if you love Jesus" bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting, so I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper.

Boy, I'm glad I did! What an uplifting experience followed!

I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord and how good He is...and I didn't notice that the light had changed. It is a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn't honked, I'd never have noticed! I found that LOTS of people love Jesus!

While I was sitting there, the guy behind started honking like crazy, and then he leaned out of his window and screamed, "For the love of GOD! GO! GO! Jesus Christ, GO!"

What an exuberant cheerleader he was for Jesus! Everyone started honking! I just leaned out of my window and started waving and smiling at all these loving people. I even honked my horn a few times to share in the love!

There must have been a man from Florida back there because I heard him yelling something about a "sunny beach"... I saw another guy waving in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck up in the air. I asked my teenage grandson in the back seat what that meant, he said that it was probably a Hawaiian good luck sign or something.

Well, I've never met anyone from Hawaii, so I leaned out the window and gave him the good luck sign back. My grandson burst out laughing ... he was enjoying this religious experience, too!

A couple of the people were so caught up in the joy of the moment that they got out of their cars and started walking towards me. I bet they wanted to pray or ask what church I attended, but this is when I noticed the light had changed. So, I waved to all my sisters and brothers grinning, and drove on through the intersection. I noticed I was the only car that got through the intersection before the light changed again and I felt kind of sad that had to leave them after all the love we had shared, so I slowed the car down, leaned out of the window and gave them all the Hawaiian good luck sign one last time as I drove away.

Praise the Lord for such wonderful folks!