Quote:
Originally Posted by 81MC
I’ve never known anyone whose parents were separated and it wasn’t ####ty. I don’t know anyone who has children of their own and separated and it wasn’t ####ty. Anyone had experience with either situation that was actually good, if not just not terrible?
My daughter is 3, and is my life. I adore her, and I think I’m a very good father to her. Things just aren’t going to work out with her mother and I, which is whatever. But the thought of losing seeing my daughter every day, being there for breakfast and bath time and story time etc just kills me.
I see know way a split household isn’t anything but worse for her. If I knew some folks managed to raise happy kids and maintained strong relationships with them over the years that might help me out.
Cohabiting and the like pretty much off the table. Her mother and I pretty much done relationship wise, I don’t think there’s any long-term coming back to a real relationship. My hope is to maintain our facade well enough and long enough to get the logistics figured out, but pull the plug before mutual resentment makes any semblance of teamwork impossible.
Honestly though I’m at such a loss about the life of our daughter. It seems so unfair to her, and if it were purely up to me I could probably live with a total apathy to her mother but I don’t think that’s healthy for anyone.
Someone please tell me their relationship with their divorced dad was anything better than the guy you have to go see sometimes  |
My parents split when I was still a kid but much older than your daughter. I don’t want to dive into everything about it, but because of my dads actions at the time I resented him until I was about 18 (good news here is it doesn’t sound like you and him were anything alike).
Once I was an adult and I saw my Dad take massive strides in himself, and never reverting back to the man he was, I gained a lot of respect for him. Coincidentally my mother began to play the same mind games with me that she used to do with him. None of this changes what happened back then but let’s just say this, my mother ghosted her grandsons first birthday and I FaceTime my dad every night so my Dad can see him and they can connect.
This is no death sentence for you and your daughter’s relationship. A happy Dad sets a great example for her to follow.