So I've Decided To Kill My Brother...

[Maritime Q-Scout]

any suggestions on what I should do with a dead body?

anyone have a van I can borrow?

how do I clean up that last little trace of blood on his bedroom floor?

and anyone want to buy some of his stuff? There's a few cool electronics, PS2, Xbox, Xbox360 (not many games though)


Any help is appreciated



(PS: For the leaglites out there I'm not *really* going to kill my brother, just giving it some thought *if* I was to do so... he litterally just left the room and announced "I have to **** like donkey kong")

[Bobblehead]

With a candlestick in the conservatory.

[rubecube]

Originally Posted by Maritime Q-Scout

(PS: For the leaglites out there I'm not *really* going to kill my brother, just giving it some thought *if* I was to do so... he litterally just left the room and announced "I have to **** like donkey kong")

That doesn't even make sense.

[J pold]

[ken0042]

If you are identical twins then you don't need to worry about leaving a DNA trail.

[Vulcan]

Sell him into slavery. No worries about cleaning up blood and if some day you're ever in trouble in Egypt, maybe he'll have become the Pharoh's governor but more likely his chief eunuch.

[Mr.Coffee]

Originally Posted by Vulcan

Sell him into slavery. No worries about cleaning up blood and if some day you're ever in trouble in Egypt, maybe he'll have become the Pharoh's governor but more likely his chief eunuch.

Do you know what year it is perhaps?

[ken0042]

^^ You say that like it matters or something.

[Buff]

Watch every episode from every season from each of the series put out by CSI and Law & Order. You should have a good idea on where and how they find their evidence. Also, by the time you've watched every single show, the desire to kill your brother will have passed and you won't have to worry about such a thing.

[jroc]

this one flew right over my head...

[Reaper]

First of all, pay cash for any "supplies" you may need for the act and do not keep any receipts.

Here's a list:
1) Wood Chipper
2) 30 5 gallon buckets with lids
3) 30 bags ready mix concrete
3) Plastic bags for "tool" disposal
4) Metal smelter for disposing of wood chipper afterwards.
5) Map illustrating all deep water bodies across the country
6) Gasoline for incinerating wood chipper output
7) Cement mixer

I could tell you more but it could get dicey with this being a public forum and all.

[ken0042]

Originally Posted by Reaper

I could tell you more but it could get dicey with this being a public forum and all.

I just have to laugh, you used "wood chipper" and "dicey" in the same post.

[Vulcan]

Originally Posted by Mr.Coffee

Do you know what year it is perhaps?

I was responding tongue in cheek as was the topic.

It's still going on my friend.

http://www.antislavery.org/

[HOOT]

Originally Posted by Reaper

First of all, pay cash for any "supplies" you may need for the act and do not keep any receipts.

Here's a list:
1) Wood Chipper
2) 30 5 gallon buckets with lids
3) 30 bags ready mix concrete
3) Plastic bags for "tool" disposal
4) Metal smelter for disposing of wood chipper afterwards.
5) Map illustrating all deep water bodies across the country
6) Gasoline for incinerating wood chipper output
7) Cement mixer

I could tell you more but it could get dicey with this being a public forum and all.

Okay this is like one of the funniest things I have ever ****ing read....I was on the floor laughing after reading this detail!

[Zarathustra]

Originally Posted by Vulcan

I was responding tongue in cheek as was the topic.

It's still going on my friend.

http://www.antislavery.org/

Human trafficking is a huge industry. You could sell your brother off as a male prostitute.

[RedMan12]

Originally Posted by HOOT

Okay this is like one of the funniest things I have ever ****ing read....I was on the floor laughing after reading this detail!

That episode with the wood chipper was on CSI Las Vegas or whatever on Spike TV tonight. haha

I didnt watch it all beacuse Carolina is playing.

[droopydrew19]

I have the perfect murder weapon. Although it may require a few more months of tolerating the ill fated sibling.

Get one of those really pointy and sharp icicles that hang down off your roof in Winter time and stab him repeatedly while he sleeps.

Leave the room and turn up the furnace and your weapon will vanish.

Let's see Grissom figure that one out

[burnin_vernon]

You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together.

And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a ****head. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig s hit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig".

[4X4]

Probably the best way is to go "hiking" in the mountains. A good push at the right time, and your troubles are over.
You've got to be able to play the part, though. Gotta act sad and distraught.

"We were walking and he just slipped!!" "Why couldn't it have been ME!"

[Blaster86]

Originally Posted by burnin_vernon

You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together.

And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a ****head. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig s hit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig".

<3 Snatch.