Ridiculous Things You Believed As A Kid

[Dion]

As a kid growing up you are exposed to so many different things. Of course the youth are impressionable that they often form opinions without all the facts. You grow into an adult and quickly realise what you believed couldn't be true.

As a wee lad I was a huge sci fi buff and had a keen interest in UFO's, lake monsters and things that had yet to be explained. I was convinced that UFO's were real and the govt was hiding the truth from all of us. The govt had found a crashed UFO at Roswell and Area 51 was hiding crashed UFO'S and the alien biebngs inside them

Then there was the Loch Ness Monster and my belief that it would only be a matter of time before the truth was found on film or on camera.

Let's hear some of the ridiculous things you believed in as a youth

[TurdFerguson]

In the context of a hamburger I believed cheese was mustard until I was about 9. Don't try and make sense of it...because you cannot. I thought I hated cheese burgers when in fact it was just mustard I disliked. All those years of plain burgers...

Yup...we all have our regrets.

[iggy_oi]

I had my life all figured out by age 6, had everything all lined up and thought I would retire knowing I'd done the one thing that I truly had a passion for my entire life. That all changed when I was applying to post secondary schools and came to realize ghostbuster was not a tangible career path. My life hasn't been the same since.

[Matty81]

Randoms off the top of my head...

- There could never be such a thing as a Star Wars or Indiana Jones movie that sucks.
- My hockey cards might not make me a millionaire but would surely fund an early retirement.
- Eventually someone would surely spot my talent and I would be scoring goals for the Calgary Flames at a record setting pace and probably pick up a half dozen cups.
- I could eat and enjoy McDonalds for every meal forever if allowed to do so.
- Work would not define me but be something I would do briefly between marathon road hockey games interrupted by runs to the circle K for sustenance.
- People at the top of the heap (wealthy or positions of authority) are there because they are smart or had some sort of great skills or abilities.
- People generally try to help each out and nobody is a dick on purpose.

[Baxter Renegade]

When I was probably 4 or 5, I saw my first Smokey the Bear commercial. I thought he was a real fire-battling bear and would daydream about aiding him.

[Cowperson]

. . . . . that boys were invincible against ANY girl.

On that firm ground, my 11 year self insulted 13 year old Coreen Dean once in our small, dusty prairie town. She kicked me in the balls and threw me into a patch of dry thistles.

So . . . . I'm fine on that front now, although I could probably take her now, 40 some years later.

Cowperson

[Minnie]

Oh good hell, I'll have to think about that one. I can tell you though, that my youngest thought mannequins were dead people that the stores bought and had stuffed to use for displays. Never said anything to us about it until nearly 4 years of age. Finally explained the wide berth given to them.

[RedMileDJ]

Great idea for a thread!

Originally Posted by Dion

As a wee lad I was a huge sci fi buff and had a keen interest in UFO's, lake monsters and things that had yet to be explained. I was convinced that UFO's were real and the govt was hiding the truth from all of us. The govt had found a crashed UFO at Roswell and Area 51 was hiding crashed UFO'S and the alien biebngs inside them

Then there was the Loch Ness Monster and my belief that it would only be a matter of time before the truth was found on film or on camera.

I still sort of believe these things. Although with the recent Area 51 announcement, I feel let down...

[TheyCallMeBruce]

I thought the universe was a membrane and it occasionally collided with another universe membrane. Boy was I an idiot child.

[transplant99]

Thought chocolate milk came from brown cows...man i liked the brown cows as a kid.

[RedMileDJ]

- We all drive on the right.
- We all speak English

If you swallowed gum, it would stay in your stomach for 25 years.

[RedMileDJ]

- I thought that black people were burn victims. When I turned on Nature of Things, and asked my Dad, he quickly corrected me.

- Computers were only good for playing games.

[Bootsy]

When I was 7 I was convinced that one day I could become Spider-Man. After countless failed attempts of getting a daddy long legs spider to bite me ( thank god I didn't grow up in Australia I'd probably be dead) and cutting up my hands pretty good with my web fluid formula that included barb wire , I gave up the dream

[iggy_oi]

I also thought the world was one big city where everyone was a 15 minute drive away

[sun]

Didn't realize women had vaginas. Thought all reproducing/birthing was butthole based.

[SportsJunky]

I believed the bible stories were real. Jesus, Mary, Jonah, Daniel, Moses etc... I bought it all and their lives were fascinating to me when I was a kid.

[BigBrodieFan]

I thought it was impossible to burp and fart at the same time, and if one did so, the consequence was death.

[RedMileDJ]

I always tried jumping off the top of the slide, with a Safeway bag around my arms and shoulders, like a parachute. I was convinced that I could float safely to the bottom.

Nope.

[iggy_oi]

Originally Posted by BigBrodieFan

I thought it was impossible to burp and fart at the same time, and if one did so, the consequence was death.

So you're saying I WON'T die? If I don't post again in a couple minutes it's your fault!