06-19-2022, 05:03 PM
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#1
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All I can get
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Sean Avery avoids jail time for ramming van with his scooter
Must've missed hearing out this earlier...
Quote:
Fifteen minutes earlier, Avery was found guilty on one count of fourth-degree criminal mischief stemming from a Feb. 23, 2019 incident — a near-collision and the aftermath — involving the Pickering native, riding an electric scooter, and a van driven by Jonathan Schulhof in Manhattan’s trendy Greenwich Village neighbourhood.
Judge Marisol Martinez-Alonso sentenced Avery — who has described himself as something of a vigilante in support of cyclists — to time served and ordered him not to have any contact with Schulhof and his family for five years. Prosecutors had asked for one year of probation along with the protection order; Avery’s lawyer, Jason Goldman, requested time served. The judge split the difference. Under New York state law, the maximum for one count of fourth-degree criminal mischief is one year in jail or three years’ probation.
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https://www.thestar.com/sports/hocke...hing-saga.html
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06-19-2022, 07:44 PM
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#2
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Crash and Bang Winger
Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: Over there
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Oilers currently enquiring if he can still play
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The Following 18 Users Say Thank You to Jethro Choicebro For This Useful Post:
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BeltlineFan,
Burner,
Cheese,
D as in David,
djsFlames,
FudsMcDuff,
GreenLantern2814,
Hockey_Ninja,
jayswin,
Major Major,
ozzy,
Reggie Dunlop,
shogged,
SnipeShow,
Snuffleupagus,
socalwingfan,
the2bears,
Tkachukwagon
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06-19-2022, 07:53 PM
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#3
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Franchise Player
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I love how the article called him a former NHL enforcer, more like a punching bag made out rat hide.
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The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Snuffleupagus For This Useful Post:
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06-19-2022, 08:14 PM
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#4
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Cleveland, OH (Grew up in Calgary)
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Nice to see he’s still such an upstanding citizen
__________________
Just trying to do my best
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06-19-2022, 09:09 PM
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#5
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Cowtown
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jethro Choicebro
Oilers currently enquiring if he can still play
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Avery hasn't raped enough women to be worthy to play for the Oilers.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by oilboimcdavid
Eakins wasn't a bad coach, the team just had 2 bad years, they should've been more patient.
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06-19-2022, 09:28 PM
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#6
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Franchise Player
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PaperBagger'14
Avery hasn't raped enough women to be worthy to play for the Oilers.
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He can't help it if he's picky. No sloppy seconds and all that.
__________________
WARNING: The preceding message may not have been processed in a sarcasm-free facility.
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06-19-2022, 11:04 PM
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#7
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Franchise Player
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There’s Nobody else in the entire league that this story would be about.
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06-19-2022, 11:26 PM
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#8
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Apartment 5A
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Who?
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06-20-2022, 12:47 AM
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#9
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Lifetime Suspension
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Quote:
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Judge Marisol Martinez-Alonso sentenced Avery — who has described himself as something of a vigilante in support of cyclists — to time served and ordered him not to have any contact with Schulhof and his family for five years. Prosecutors had asked for one year of probation along with the protection order; Avery’s lawyer, Jason Goldman, requested time served. The judge split the difference. Under New York state law, the maximum for one count of fourth-degree criminal mischief is one year in jail or three years’ probation.
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This made me laugh out loud.
From NHL punching bag to d-bag batman on a moped.
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06-20-2022, 07:05 AM
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#10
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Backup Goalie
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Calgary
Exp: 
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When I read the bit about ramming a scooter into a minivan - it just sounded to me like a horrible idea and miscalculation which is very on brand for Sean Avery.
Sounds like he moreso swung the scooter into the side of the van. What a stooge.
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06-20-2022, 07:41 AM
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#11
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Franchise Player
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Quote:
Originally Posted by djsFlames
This made me laugh out loud.
From NHL punching bag to d-bag batman on a moped.
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The world needs more cyclist vigilantes.
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The Following User Says Thank You to Goriders For This Useful Post:
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06-20-2022, 07:45 AM
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#12
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First Line Centre
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Calgary
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Quote:
Originally Posted by djsFlames
This made me laugh out loud.
From NHL punching bag to d-bag batman on a moped.
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Avery: You know, I’m something of a vigilante in support of cyclists myself.
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GO FLAMES GO!
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06-20-2022, 08:15 AM
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#13
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Powerplay Quarterback
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He doesn’t want kanes sloppy seconds
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06-20-2022, 09:51 AM
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#14
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Franchise Player
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Income Tax Central
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Quote:
Originally Posted by djsFlames
This made me laugh out loud.
From NHL punching bag to d-bag batman on a moped.
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Just more proof that cyclists are a scourge.
__________________
The Beatings Shall Continue Until Morale Improves!
This Post Has Been Distilled for the Eradication of Seemingly Incurable Sadness.
If you are flammable and have legs, you are never blocking a Fire Exit. - Mitch Hedberg
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06-20-2022, 09:59 AM
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#15
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All I can get
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The expression "Batman on a Bicycle" needs to enter common parlance, i.e. an expression of awe, surprise, astonishment, etc.
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