Commercials you can't stand!

[rotten42]

Holy fawk...the Universal Ford commercial with the gut singing like he is a bass guitar. It is enough to bring to mind Cannibal Corpse's song, Hammered Smash Face


There's something inside me
It's, it's coming out, I feel like killing you
Let loose the anger, held back too long
My blood runs cold

Through my anatomy, dwells another being
Rooted in my cortex, a servant to its bidding
Brutality now becomes my appetite
Violence is now a way of life

The sledge my tool to torture
As it pounds down on your forehead
Eyes bulging from their sockets
With every swing of my mallet

I smash your #####ing head in, until brains seep in
Through the cracks, blood does leak
Distorted beauty, catastrophe
Steaming slop, splattered all over me
Lifeless body, slouching dead Lecherous abscess
Where you once had a head

Avoiding the prophecy of my new found lust
You will never live again, soon your life will end
I'll see you die at my feet, eternally I smash your face
facial bones collapse as I crack your skull in half

Crushing, cranial, contents
Draining the snot, I rip out the eyes
Squeezing them in my hands nerves are incised
Peeling the flesh off the bottom of my weapon

Involuntarily pulpifying facial regions
Suffer, and then you die Torture, pulverized
At one with my sixth sense, I feel free
To kill as I please, no one can stop me
Created to kill, the carnage continues

Violently reshaping human facial tissue
Brutality becomes my appetite
Violence is now a way of life
The sledge my tool to torture
As it pounds down on your forehead






seriously though...this band has problems.

[troutman]

Originally Posted by rotten42

Holy fawk...the Universal Ford commercial with the gut singing like he is a bass guitar.

Many advertisers intend to be as annoying as possible. It works.

[rotten42]

Originally Posted by troutman

Many advertisers intend to be as annoying as possible. It works.

It gets me to remember them but I won't shop there. Same thing goes for Spence Diamonds.

[Inglewood Jack]

what the...those song lyrics are sickening, why did I read that. I clicked hoping to laugh at funny annoyances with commercials, and that comes up instead??

[troutman]

Originally Posted by rotten42

It gets me to remember them but I won't shop there. Same thing goes for Spence Diamonds.

Right, but new customers must hugely outnumber the boycotters.

[OutOfTheCube]

Originally Posted by Inglewood Jack

what the...those song lyrics are sickening, why did I read that. I clicked hoping to laugh at funny annoyances with commercials, and that comes up instead??

No kidding -- people actually listen to songs like that? I know it's death metal or whatever but seriously, that's pretty messed up.

[taco.vidal]

The "A Little More Interesting" commercial with Boomer on the Fan960. That commercial is cringe worthy with Boomer. It needs a female voice. The Fan has no female personalities so they should have had a pro voice it rather Boomer. Terrible.

[greyshep]

Have to mention the stupid Ford F150 commercial that is overplayed during flames games. So dumb. "You can buy a new one in 2 years" followed by the dufus telling the other guy that he "saw another blue one online" for him....so stupid and cheesy.

Seriously who writes these things?

[pylon]

I like the bass guitar commercial.... especially the slide he does at the end.

[Resolute 14]

Well hell. Chevrolet managed to surpass Febreeze for insulting the viewer's intelligence. They had paid actors (which they explicitly lied about in the commercial itself) look at two pictures of the same guy - one in front of a random car and the other in front of a Colorado truck - and basically ask which they would rather date.

How the hell does that even get out of the concept stage in the ad executives' office?

[OutOfTheCube]

Originally Posted by Resolute 14

Well hell. Chevrolet managed to surpass Febreeze for insulting the viewer's intelligence. They had paid actors (which they explicitly lied about in the commercial itself) look at two pictures of the same guy - one in front of a random car and the other in front of a Colorado truck - and basically ask which they would rather date.

How the hell does that even get out of the concept stage in the ad executives' office?

I thought it was meant to be facetious -- like, "Look at these totally not paid actors looking at this picture! So funny! We're making fun of these types of ads!" Like that popcorn ad where half the theatre gets popcorn and the other doesn't. I mean, it's obviously the exact same guy (he isn't even wearing a different shirt) and the people's responses are so over the top ("This guy is way sexier!").

Unless they really think people are that dumb.

[ricosuave]

The commercial for Lincoln with Matthew McConaughey in it.

[RedMileDJ]

nm

[AFireInside]

The telus penguin commercial with that embarrassment of a song by Zeus.

"I miss my friends, I miss them all, I wanna know what they're doing now I'm going to give them a call"..

This song drives me insane, and it's played every commercial break during flames games. Those are lyrics written by someone in elementary school..

Someone may have mentioned this commercial already I went back to few pages and didn't see it..

[Resolute 14]

Originally Posted by OutOfTheCube

I thought it was meant to be facetious -- like, "Look at these totally not paid actors looking at this picture! So funny! We're making fun of these types of ads!" Like that popcorn ad where half the theatre gets popcorn and the other doesn't. I mean, it's obviously the exact same guy (he isn't even wearing a different shirt) and the people's responses are so over the top ("This guy is way sexier!").

Unless they really think people are that dumb.

I'm betting the latter. And Mythbusters did an episode last year on how circumstances surrounding a person impact how desirable they appear to others, so I also know where the ad agency came up with the commercial idea.

If they were trying to be cute or funny, Chevy still missed the mark by a mile.

[Table 5]

Originally Posted by taco.vidal

The "A Little More Interesting" commercial with Boomer on the Fan960. That commercial is cringe worthy with Boomer. It needs a female voice. The Fan has no female personalities so they should have had a pro voice it rather Boomer. Terrible.

As cringe worthy as that is, it was even more so when Pat Steinberg was the one doing the lines. Don't get me wrong, I think he's a fine radio host, but McLovin is the last guy I want telling me to spice up my sex life.

[Igster]

Originally Posted by AFireInside

The telus penguin commercial with that embarrassment of a song by Zeus.

"I miss my friends, I miss them all, I wanna know what they're doing now I'm going to give them a call"..

This song drives me insane, and it's played every commercial break during flames games. Those are lyrics written by someone in elementary school..

Someone may have mentioned this commercial already I went back to few pages and didn't see it..

Personally I would like to drive a Rav4 through the Telus building after watching a game.

[DuffMan]

Ed u k shun con ex shun. (Trying to spell it the way they sing it) seen this in walking dead and Saul, I think. A 25 year old girl dances around her room rapping about her unknown future and then takes advice from a 45 year old window cleaner on how to get a career.

[Superflyer]

The Kraft PB ultra sappy commercial is really bugging me. The music and the fact that it is trying to be ultra sappy is just terrible. You are selling peanut butter, not long distance or Hallmark cards.

[Daradon]

Originally Posted by OutOfTheCube

I thought it was meant to be facetious -- like, "Look at these totally not paid actors looking at this picture! So funny! We're making fun of these types of ads!" Like that popcorn ad where half the theatre gets popcorn and the other doesn't. I mean, it's obviously the exact same guy (he isn't even wearing a different shirt) and the people's responses are so over the top ("This guy is way sexier!").

Unless they really think people are that dumb.

I don't think it was meant to be facetious actually. The average TV viewer appears to have a lesser grasp on sarcasm and the like than the internet user (yes, there is huge overlap, I get that) and sometimes I wonder about people's grasp here. There are some seriously insulting commercials on TV.

Plus, they could always straddle the line and act like it was their plan all along. Get those that are gullible, then play it down for those who aren't gullible. 'Oh, we were just trying to be funny!'