Denver is No Good: The Trash Talk thread

[Johnny Makarov]

The Denver Norgeeks

[Enoch Root]

If Denver were an omelette, it would be very cheesy.

[Toonage]

Denver? More like Donever amirite?

I'll see myself out.

[Magnum PEI]

Is it OK to make fun of Nathan MacKinnon's lisp?

Mikko Rantanen built a disc golf course and it's a little narcissistic.

[Reggie Dunlop]

I'm looking forward to the young Mr. Tkachuk providing meme-worthy fodder.

[LaFlamaBlanca]

When Avs fans make a pb+j sandwich they spread the peanut butter over the jam.

[ThisIsAnOutrage]

Originally Posted by Groot

MacKinnon stops in merge lanes
Landeskog puts milk in the bowl first and pours cereal in after
Rantanen orders his steak well-done
Jost once kicked a puppy at a baby
Soderberg doesn't tip servers
Barrie puts the empty milk carton back in the fridge
Compher purposely sneezes on people when he's sick
Girard never washes his hands after using the bathroom
Andrighetto can't spell his own last name
Johnson gets on elevators before letting people get off
Kerfoot takes money from Salvation Army donation boxes
Wilson hits on girls at the gym
Nemeth doesnt rake sand traps or repair his ball mark when golfing
Nieto calls out his own name during sex
Zadorov still cuts the crusts off his sandwiches
Brassard stands on the left side of escalators
Cole's favourite comedian is Carlos Mencia
Bourque tells everyone his Dad's name is Ray
Grubauer claps at the end of movies
Varlamov pees in the shower

This looks like fun...


The purple dye in Avalanche jerserys gives children incurable bone cancer.
Avalanche fans don't have gas caps on their cars
The men of Denver consider mustache wax a food group.
MacKinnon adds raw shrimp to buffets
Rantanen doesn't tip
Landeskog steals from the War Amps
Wearing an Avalanche jersey adds 50 lbs
Grubauer deals meth in Mr. Roger's neighbourhood
Girard considers mouthwash an apertif
Cole sink washes his balls in gas station bathrooms
Bednar uses cling wrap instead of a condom

[Reggie Dunlop]

I'd call them the Chavs, but that's too obscure a British reference.

[Kidder]

How has the Avs poop emoji logo not been posted yet?

[Dion]

This kid seems to understand

[jessnuts]

They French fry when they should pizza. They’re gunna have a bad time.

[browna]

Remember when they announced they would retire a number of a player that played for them for 94 games, before the team of where he played 20.5 seasons and over 1500 games did?

[Cheese]

[Five-hole]

People in Denver brush their teeth by moving their head back and forth, instead of moving the toothbrush.

[Strange Brew]

When you travel to Denver and disembark the plane, people don't wait for the passengers in the row in front of them.

[TheScorpion]

Matt Nieto eats his toast with butter and jam.

[Coach]

Originally Posted by TheScorpion

Matt Nieto eats his toast with butter and jam.

If you're not putting butter on your toast before jam, you're doing toast wrong.

[TheScorpion]

Originally Posted by Coach

If you're not putting butter on your toast before jam, you're doing toast wrong.

Ew, wtf? That's gross.

Come on, someone help me on this.

[Toonage]

Not going to lie. With some of what I've read here I feel like I could have grown up in Denver. Right down to the personalized disc golf course.

[Locke]

Everyone knows that bread is best raw. Toast is murder and potentially even a hate crime and the only acceptable bread topping is Nutella.