Michael Bluth: Get rid of the Seaward.
Lucille Bluth: I'll leave when I'm good and ready.
Michael Bluth: You seem more villainous than usual, Mom; are you sober?
Lucille: Michael, it's eight a.m.
Michael Bluth: So, it's not that.
Lucille: I don't know. Maybe it's because I went off my post-partum medication.
Michael Bluth: You were still taking that? You had Buster thirty-two years ago.
Lucille: And that's how long I've been depressed about him.
Lucille: Well, apparently, mood-altering medication leads to street drugs. That's what this very handsome young doctor said on the Today Show.
Michael Bluth: That was Tom Cruise, the actor.
Lucille: They said he was some kind of scientist.
Michael: It is going to up in Tahoe a couple more days. Maybe you could take a date
Lucille: How am I supposed to find someone willing to go into that musty old claptrap?
Michael: [Michael stares at her awkwardly] The cabin... yes! That would be difficult, too.
Lucille Bluth: Michael, the little Korean is here, and I don't know what to do with him. At least I think it's a him. You've got to strip them down to next to nothing before you could even tell.
Michael Bluth: Yeah. Mom, I just spoke to Social Services and, although they don't like to do this, if you can prove that it's a bad environment for a child - and I would suggest saying what you just said to me, don't change a word - they will take him back.
Michael: Buster got a medal, what for?
Lucille: Oh who knows what they were saying? It's probably because a seal ate his hand. Apparently, the army is giving out medals for being food now.
Lucille: I have a plan to stave off intruders.
Michael Bluth: What's that?
Lucille: [holds up an air horn and a fire poker] First I blow him then I poke him.
Michael Bluth: [stunned] Guy doesn't know what he's in for.
TOBIAS: Well, yes, but I'm afraid I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run, if you will, so now I'm afraid I have something of a mess on my hands.
MICHAEL: There are just so many poorly chosen words in that sentence.
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If you guys like AD, I find Community has the same witty and rapid fire jokes as AD had. Modern Family doesn't even come close, as someone said, it's not very subtle as AD was.
Last edited by yads; 08-23-2010 at 11:34 AM.
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Modern Family and Community are the only two shows still on that come close to AD in my eyes. I could watch both seasons over again and laugh just as hard.
Michael: My mom is very stressed out, and she needs something I can't give her, um... maybe a little "afternoon delight". Narrator: Oscar thought that Michael was referring to a particular brand of cannabis named Afternoon Deelite, a strain famous for slowing behavior. Oscar: Well sure, my question is, which way do I try to get it in her? Michael: I don't need any details. Oscar: Maybe I'll put it in her brownie Michael: Hey.
AD is my favourite television comedy of all time. I like Community and Modern Family as well, which have been mentioned in this show, but neither one of them has ever made me laugh until my stomach hurts like AD did with some regularity.
Someone mentioned Peep Show as well which is another great comedy for those who haven't seen it. Probably my second favourite comedy after AD.
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TOBIAS: Well, yes, but I'm afraid I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run, if you will, so now I'm afraid I have something of a mess on my hands.
MICHAEL: There are just so many poorly chosen words in that sentence.
TOBIAS: My schedule however, is as open as my relationship with my wife. So why don't we pair up and hit the town together! I'll be your wingman. Even if it means me taking a chubby, I will suck it up!
MICHAEL: OK, that's enough family stuff for today.
Modern Family and Community are the only two shows still on that come close to AD in my eyes. I could watch both seasons over again and laugh just as hard.
I personally find the humor in Modern Family to be better than Community, but I love both shows.
The best scene in Modern Family is at the very end of the episode Starry Night when the parents and Luke eat some of the cupcakes that Haley makes. As soon as she leaves Claire asks if they still have the number for poison control, Phil tells Claire "I'll always love you" and Luke wanders in saying that his mouth feels like when he goes to the dentist. I freaking cried with laughter at that.
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Who is in charge of this product and why haven't they been fired yet?
Wife of Gob: I'm in love with your brother-in-law. Gob: You're in love with your own brother? The one in the army? Wife of Gob: No, your sister's husband. Gob: Michael? [angrily] Michael! Wife of Gob: No, that's your sister's brother. Gob: No, I'm my sister's brother. [happily] You're in love with me — me! Wife of Gob: I'm in love with Tobias. Gob: My brother-in-law? Wife of Gob: I know it can never be, so I'm leaving. I'm enlisting in the army. Gob: To be with your brother? Wife of Gob: No!
Last edited by J pold; 08-23-2010 at 03:29 PM.
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Not sure if it has been mentioned and I can't remember the episode, but the wife and I laughed seriously for 10 minutes and had AD paused so we could catch our breath and clear our tears at this moment. One of the funniest I've ever heard on TV:
Michael: Uh, since you're devastating people, why don't you go ahead and tell Gob that I'll be telling the cops that it was him in the truck so he'll be joining me here. I've got a nice, hard cot with his name on it.
Lucille: *shocked* You'd do that to your own brother?
Michael :Well, you do it your way, GOB, I'm just here to have fun.
Gob: Well, not too much fun. I gave my big sexual harasment speech earlier today.
Gob[earlier that day]: Please refrain from discussing or engaging in any inter-office *bleep* or *bleep* -ing, or finger *bleep* or *bleep* -sting or *bleep* -esting or *bleep* eing or *bleep* or even *bleep* even though so many of you are begging for it. Oh and if anyone tries anything with my sister Lindsay, I'll take off my pants, I'll shave my *bleep* . And I'll personally *really long bleep* .
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