How useless are you?

[jolinar of malkshor]

Originally Posted by Resolute 14

I'd just beat up the people who are productive and take their foods.

You better hope you have a bigger gun than me then.

[troutman]

Originally Posted by FireFly

I think I'd be okay. I have some skills, but besides that, I'm cute. I'd just find the guy with the most dead animals and do sexual favours for food.

Whatever happend to men hunting, and women gathering?

[burn_this_city]

Originally Posted by JD

Yeah, easy, just make sure you have a laptop with an aircard and bookmark the above link so you can refer back to it.

I guess if you can't remember 5 simple instructions you aren't going to last long anyhow. when society collapses might aswell bend over and kiss your ass goodbye..

[FireFly]

Originally Posted by troutman

Whatever happend to men hunting, and women gathering?

I can gather a harem of men to hunt for me... does that count?

Kidding. In all seriousness, I'd probably still be okay. I can grow stuff, I can fish if I need to. Don't like to kill things though.

[icarus]

I would head into the outback and become this guy:

[Calgaryborn]

If you don't own a gun you could always follow a Mormon home. They're suppose to have 3 years of supplies at the ready at any given time.

[Azure]

All we need is the internet and we should be good to go.

[jammies]

Originally Posted by Resolute 14

I can beat people up for you while you build your tribe.

Then I'll beat you up and take over.

Perhaps your Machiavellian political skills have betrayed you, as while the prospect of a henchman to keep my hands clean is attractive, I prefer that my henchmen scheme quietly in their heads, not out loud where I can hear them and thus prepare myself for the betrayal.

[Dion]

Originally Posted by troutman

'Dem bugs are good eatin'.

Some of them are very crunchy like the june bugs and grasshoppers.

[jammies]

Originally Posted by fotze

If the currency of the new world were Units of Eric Nystrom-Hate you'd be a magnate.

Actually, he'd probably make a good thug, as he already has most of the training, being a hockey player and all - plus he's American so he probably has a hundred guns at home we could use!

As long as he never, ever has read this board and makes the connection. Then I'll be meat for the cookpot that night.

[Barnes]

I'd do all right. I wouldn't stick around Calgary though. I would find a nice little beach in the virgin islands, grow a beard, learn to play the steel drums, and build my own hut.

I'm pretty handy and have a knack for finding items and making good use of them.

I'll send you suckers freezing in the foothills a Christmas card.

[HelloHockeyFans]

I can barely survive without my Crackberry

[chid]

If someone catches the fish, I'll gut them

[Tiger]

remember... Mormans have a year supply of food in their house, learn where all the mormans are in your nieghbourhood and you'll have enough food for a long time!

[TheyCallMeBruce]

I think the most interesting senario would be a zombie invasion. I have thought about it and read that the best place to hold up is in a walmart. You can last years if you only have a group of 10 or fewer. If you're in the states, that's even better, because American Walmarts sell weapons.

[Calgaryborn]

Originally Posted by chid

If someone catches the fish, I'll gut them

Sounds like a rednecks proposal of marriage.

[Burninator]

Food? Who has time to worry about food? I would be more concerned about the mutant zombie up rising that would surely attack humanity after nuclear fallout.

[Burninator]

Originally Posted by TheyCallMeBruce

I think the most interesting senario would be a zombie invasion. I have thought about it and read that the best place to hold up is in a walmart. You can last years if you only have a group of 10 or fewer. If you're in the states, that's even better, because American Walmarts sell weapons.

Walmart and shotguns. Every zombie up rising is fought with shot guns and a cool dry wit.

[CaramonLS]

So far I see not a lot of people with stores of food, or skills to help in the aftermath - but I sure see a hell of a lot of guns.

At least this promises to be a 'fun' apocolypse.

[NuclearFart]

Originally Posted by flylock shox

Stephen King's The Stand gives a pretty good idea of who'd be necessary post-apocalypse: doctors, those with knowledge of machinery, and old women able to call on the power of God to smite evil-doers.

Sadly, I think the vast majority of north american doctors would be pretty useless. So many of us are so sub-subspecialized, and we rely so much on sophisticated tests/imaging, rather than pure clinical skills to make the diagnosis these days. And even beyond that, what sort of therapeutics would you have? Nothing prescribable, or referrable to surgeons. I guess splints could be fashioned from the bones of so many dead patients.

I'd probably have to join the large herd ruled by the alpha male, hanging around the periphery, but running inside and impregnating the women when he's not looking.