should kids be rewarded/praised just for participating?

[Wormius]

Interesting discussion. I agree that after a certain age kids will eventually recognize that participation awards aren't as coveted as 1st, 2nd, 3rd, etc. I am not sure what they really matter though - its not as if the child gets the award every day after a game, so the motivational aspect of it seems kind of too far off into the future to matter, unless your kid is so focused on that end dream of getting an award in x-months.

We did U6 soccer this year, and I think one of the things they did really well was eliminate the goalie from the games they had. I think kids are naturally competitive and are motivated more by scoring goals or being successful in what they try. Just help set them up for success. This probably means more than a partipaction pin or whatever they have now.

[THE SCUD]

Originally Posted by saskflames96

I've always been mature for my age. I put away $20 a month towards retirement aka. the 'ol savings account.

That will turn into "First Semester Booze Fund" in about 3 year's time. I guarantee it.

[flamesfever]

Originally Posted by Russic

For me the issue extends beyond sport. Sport has the luxury of having a fairly well defined winner and loser. School meanwhile seems to be a little more ambiguous with how teachers are told to treat children. Over the several years my wife has been a teacher she's been asked to do things like mark with a certain colour of pen so the criticism isn't taken as too harsh, or come up with 3 nice things to say about the individuals character on their report card. The kid who comes to class everyday and is a little pr*** to his classmates doesn't need you to take it easy on his poor little emotions and tell him how bloody awesome he is. My personal opinion is that one aspect of a teachers job is to prepare children for the real world, but instead many are kept from doing it.

Sorry, that got off the rails a little bit.

I agree, and also believe report cards should give some idea of a child’s standing relative to his or her peers. I believe this would spur an element of competition, and give parents an immediate warning that their child needed remedial help, particularly if they were in the lower part of the class. It could be done, in a less harsh manner than the old system of reporting the exact standing numerically, by stating what quartile the student was in.

From the comments on the report cards I got for my kids, you had very little idea how they were doing. It took us far too long for us to determine that one of our children needed serious help, as almost all the comments on his report card were positive for the first couple of years. Even the teacher interviews were not that instructive.

Another child of ours was rather mediocre in public school, but suddenly excelled in junior high. I asked him why that was and he said, "It wasn't cool to be smart in public school, Dad, whereas it was the opposite in junior high". Perhaps with a little more competition in public school, it may have kindled his competitive spirit and encouraged him to do better.

[Daradon]

Originally Posted by Russic

I think participation awards are fine up until a point, but I don't think they are damaging, they just become equated with a prize for losing. As several have pointed out participation awards can be a really good thing at a certain age. At some point as they mature they'll see the participation ribbon for what it is, and I don't think that's a bad thing either. Failure is an essential part of development, but the development curve is gentle. It's not as though we need to send our kids to the salt mines for not scoring on a shootout, nor should we chisel a bust in their image out of gold for coming in last.

For me the issue extends beyond sport. Sport has the luxury of having a fairly well defined winner and loser. School meanwhile seems to be a little more ambiguous with how teachers are told to treat children. Over the several years my wife has been a teacher she's been asked to do things like mark with a certain colour of pen so the criticism isn't taken as too harsh, or come up with 3 nice things to say about the individuals character on their report card. The kid who comes to class everyday and is a little pr*** to his classmates doesn't need you to take it easy on his poor little emotions and tell him how bloody awesome he is. My personal opinion is that one aspect of a teachers job is to prepare children for the real world, but instead many are kept from doing it.

Sorry, that got off the rails a little bit.

This is a good point. Like the issue of not being able to hold a kid back anymore. The kids get pushed through whether their ready or not, whether they have the right attitude or not etc.

For me, the question isn't so much 'should kids be praised for participation' but 'should kids be disciplined/punished/held back/given a wake up call more often'. I don't think there is a lot of problems with over praising children in a lot of situations, but more not being real with them in many situations. Not being able to tell them, 'this isn't good enough,' or 'that's not what's expected,' or simply, 'your not ready yet and need to work harder'.

EDIT: And as an after thought, yes many kids do need more help to reach expected levels, and I have no problem with that, and believe there should probably be more programs to deal with that. But when you push them through I don't think that's good for the kid, or the next teacher to get them. Sure it may save some hurt feeling now, but how bad is that kid going to feel when he's even further behind the next year, and even more the year after that!

[WesternCanadaKing]

Ricky Bobby: Wait, Dad. Don't you remember the time you told me "If you ain't first, you're last"?
Reese Bobby: Huh? What are you talking about, Son?
Ricky Bobby: That day at school.
Reese Bobby: Oh hell, Son, I was high that day. That doesn't make any sense at all, you can be second, third, fourth... hell you can even be fifth.
Ricky Bobby: What? I've lived my whole life by that!

[yads]

Originally Posted by CaptainCrunch

True, but even Olympians won't tell you that they're all that proud of finishing 39th in a field of 45, and that they need to take the lesson's learned and improve.

Depends, if they didn't even qualify before, just making the olympic team would be a huge achievement for them, everything after that would be gravy. Sure they'd want to improve, but that doesn't mean they'd be disappointed in their performance.

[Stay Golden]

Been involved with minor sports in Calgary Soccer, Hockey, as a coach and administrator for many years. JMO when kids are 4-6, Its good to have all the kids recieve something at the end of the year so they keep enjoy playing a sport and most of them at that age really don't know what they are doing. But at age 7 the skill set either increases greatly or only slightly with every child and physical strength also seperates players. At that age is where seperation into divisions reflective of the various skill sets has to take place. Pts and scores become valued by the kids.
Having been involved in the process that helped determine which child should go to which division for the association I was representing. It is difficult because some kids or even the parents see playing say a Div6 as losers as kids and parents involved in Div1, or A,AA,AAA as being winners.
Which is furthest from why it has to be done. It was always difficult to tell a child or parent that they would be playing in a division much less than they had hoped for especially with kids around age 12. We looked at the evaluations as 3 main focal points, confidence, developement, fun.
Several coaches did not give out individual awards at the end of the year because they felt feelings would get hurt or it would be veiwed as favoritism by some parents.
I always gave a most improved, best defensive, best offensive, hardest working, and leadership award out of my pocket and the kids and their parents were really proud getting those individual awards.

[John Doe]

My son is 16 and after every practice/game/tournament the first thing I still ask him is if he had fun. If he isn't enjoying it, I can guarantee that he will not be playing the sport for very long. We both know that he is not going to be a professional athlete, but if he keeps playing and being involved in sports for his entire life then I would consider him a success in sports regardless of whether he wins or loses in the games he plays.