Tom Cruise building '£5m bunker to protect against alien attack'

[flip]

Originally Posted by troutman

Why is Christianity immune from examination? To an outsider, it is just as irrational as Scientology, Islam, Judaism, or any religion you can think of.

no it isn't just as irrational. as a agnostic i can safely say that scientology is stupider than Mr Garrison's flying spaghetti monster religion (south park episode) and believing that Jedis are real.

it is a dumb cult nothing more. i never thought id say this but christianity at least has SOME truth behind it. it wasn't invented by a boy loving science fiction writer.

[browna]

Sheesh I hope not. By some stroke of luck I'll be protected from the attack hiking in some cave, and will be then forced to watch every variation of movie genere with him and Travolta as the only two stars left.

And, "Welcome Back Kotter" renunion with Cruise playing Horshack.

[OutOfTheCube]

[arsenal]

Originally Posted by OutOfTheCube

Haha.. Someone needs to make a shirt outta that.

[Thor]

Originally Posted by SportsJunky

I for one welcome our new alien overlords.

Me too!

Here's more on Xenu and Scientology if anyone is interested, its hilarious:

http://xenu.net

Also a must read by Hubbard's son, former Scientologist and later became the outcast:

http://www.scientomogy.com/lronhubbardjr.php

[Muta]

Guys, I'm a full-out Scientologist. And I'm telling you now, Xenu is one scary individual and his powers should not be obliviously underestimated by mere mortals such as ourselves.

We have no comprehension of the kind of destuction this entity can bring to our people. We must defend our planet at all costs. Our day of reckoning is upon us. Will you join us in our fight for intergalactical supremacy? The fate of the human race depends on it.

[Azure]

Originally Posted by Muta

Guys, I'm a full-out Scientologist. And I'm telling you now, Xenu is one scary individual and his powers should not be obliviously underestimated by mere mortals such as ourselves.

We have no comprehension of the kind of destuction this entity can bring to our people. We must defend our planet at all costs. Our day of reckoning is upon us. Will you join us in our fight for intergalactical supremacy? The fate of the human race depends on it.

Bullcrap.

I don't believe you.

[Locke]

Originally Posted by Muta

Guys, I'm a full-out Scientologist. And I'm telling you now, Xenu is one scary individual and his powers should not be obliviously underestimated by mere mortals such as ourselves.

We have no comprehension of the kind of destuction this entity can bring to our people. We must defend our planet at all costs. Our day of reckoning is upon us. Will you join us in our fight for intergalactical supremacy? The fate of the human race depends on it.

I'm willing to take my chances.

I bet this Xenu character couldnt even take 60 Five Year Olds.

[TheDragon]

Originally Posted by Muta

Guys, I'm a full-out Scientologist. And I'm telling you now, Xenu is one scary individual and his powers should not be obliviously underestimated by mere mortals such as ourselves.

We have no comprehension of the kind of destuction this entity can bring to our people. We must defend our planet at all costs. Our day of reckoning is upon us. Will you join us in our fight for intergalactical supremacy? The fate of the human race depends on it.

Don't worry, I'm really good at Halo. Xenu doesn't stand a chance against my Plasma Grenades.

[Azure]

Originally Posted by Locke

I'm willing to take my chances.

I bet this Xenu character couldnt even take 60 Five Year Olds.

I bet he doesn't have a super-human baby on his side either.

[Azure]

You guys better take all that crap you've said against Xenu back....

Suspect in Tom Cruise extortion plot found dead

PHOENIX — A man who agreed to plead guilty in a plot to extort more than $1 million from Tom Cruise for the actor's stolen wedding photos was found dead in his home, authorities said.


Investigators said it appeared David Hans Schmidt, 47, who was under house arrest and faced up to two years in federal prison, had committed suicide.

http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/ent/5174898.html

[Muta]

Originally Posted by TheDragon

Don't worry, I'm really good at Halo. Xenu doesn't stand a chance against my Plasma Grenades.

You, sir, would make a great addition to the 5th Elite Infantry Division. These Plasma Grenades you speak of may become of exceptional assistance in eradicating the alien threat. Send me your contact information as soon as possible so that I can provide you with the right paperwork to finalize the recruitment process.

Any other Halo players out there? These types of individuals usually have the desire, intelligence and motivation to stand up for what they believe in. How many of you are interested in making the jump from playing Master Chief to actually being Master Chief?

The world needs your help; we depend on it. Xenu's arrival will be swift and unforgiving, and I can guarantee you this - we must show them no mercy as much as they will not for us.

[Hack&Lube]

The best thing to read or listen to are L Ron Hubbard's lectures. The guy is the worst speaker in history and it's obvious he's just making it up as he goes along rambling like a deranged person who used to be a science fiction writer.

"I suppose the guy who has trouble running another Thetan at that proximity probably not very horse-powered or something of the sort. Well all I ever did was a body Thetan was just think "go to the .. uh .. uh .. think Incident One zoooom! Go through it, get your stop off you know", "Rmmm", he says "Rmmmm. Zooooom! Hrrm. Hey that's mine!" he'd say. "I'm leaving!" I'd say "Good bye!"

"They were imported. They were actually .. the trick was to shoot somebody, disable somebody, very often a needle into a lung and at the same time to hit him with frozen alcohol and glycol which preparation is guaranteed to pick up a Thetan. All they had to do was pick him up and put him in a refrigerator and they had him, boy. If he tried to exteriorize from the body, there he was, frozen. And they threw 'em into collection points, boxed 'em up in boxes, threw 'em into space planes which were the exact copies of DC8's, the DC8 airplane is the exact copy of the space plane of that day. And, no difference, except the DC8 had fans, propellers on it and the space plane didn't."

"And although I don't think you'd have very much pleasure out of kissing a girl from Jupiter - that's a heavy-gravity planet, and if you stepped on the planet Jupiter in one of these meat bodies that you presently have, you would become a pancake promptly, you see? And what atmosphere it has lies in seas of liquid air and so on. You might say that this is somewhat rigerous as an environment, not completely similar to Russia but.. [laughter]. So you do get these various variations. And it's not all that horrifying however. You find somebody running around the planet Jupiter, he'd be built to withstand that climatic condition, and the gravitic condition and so forth, and his legs might be a bit modified and his arms and that sort of thing, but he would probably look like an Eskimo."

Also - everything the millenia old ancient alien civilizations in faraway galaxys ever possessed look exactly like how earth in the 1950s and 1960s did (they had locomotives, dressed like people in the 50s, all spaceships looked like 1950s DC-8s). It's even better listening to them in audio format:
http://www.rr.cistron.nl/xenu/quotes.htm

[Flashpoint]

Originally Posted by flip

it is a dumb cult nothing more. i never thought id say this but christianity at least has SOME truth behind it.

What part? The invisible man who lives in the sky? Or the part about Jesus coming back from the dead?

There is no difference between the two. Except that Scientology accepts homosexuals. It wasn't always that way, but in 1976 Hubbart's gay son committed suicide, and so he started to show more tolerance.

Wow. Scientology has the upper hand with regard to tolerance.

Now THAT'S scary.

[TheyCallMeBruce]

Originally Posted by Hack&Lube

"I suppose the guy who has trouble running another Thetan at that proximity probably not very horse-powered or something of the sort. Well all I ever did was a body Thetan was just think "go to the .. uh .. uh .. think Incident One zoooom! Go through it, get your stop off you know", "Rmmm", he says "Rmmmm. Zooooom! Hrrm. Hey that's mine!" he'd say. "I'm leaving!" I'd say "Good bye!"

??????????????????

[Azure]

Originally Posted by Flashpoint

What part? The invisible man who lives in the sky? Or the part about Jesus coming back from the dead?

There is no difference between the two. Except that Scientology accepts homosexuals. It wasn't always that way, but in 1976 Hubbart's gay son committed suicide, and so he started to show more tolerance.

Wow. Scientology has the upper hand with regard to tolerance.

Now THAT'S scary.

Its your problem if you want to avoid the 'history' behind Christianity. The history behind the Bible...etc, etc.

Textcritic had a great post in another thread...

Read it...

What does anyone's "view" of the Bible matter, when our understanding of what the Bible is is extremely inaccurate?

There are two sides, generally, of this debate: on the one hand is the opinion that the Bible is a meaningless collection of fairytales with no bearing on the present. On the other hand is the conviction that the Bible is a narrative retelling of the universal history, and that it is completely accurate and it is normative for everyone, everywhere, at every time.

Both are patently false.

The Bible is most certainly a broad collection of religious myths, but this is different than ancient fictions or "fairytales". Ancient myths contained within them important interpretations of history, and thus, much of the material from the Bible is important historiographically. The Bible's primary importance, however, is felt religiously and culturally. It is perhaps the single most important "literary work"—and I use this term with some caution—of Western culture. It is the foundation, like it or not, of the legal and moral practice for the vast majority of Western civilizations, and for this reason, it is an important book to know. Also, the Bible is the surviving collection of sacred Scriptures for the largest religion on the face of the earth; the Hebrew Scriptures are foundational for Judaism and were a formative part of the religion of Islam. I do not care what your opinion is of these religions or religions in general, but the very fact that so many people take the Bible seriously makes it meaningful. More often than not, critics of the Christian and Jewish faith have failed to take account of the Bible's special significance.

On the other hand, the Bible is not a narrative work (although it does contain narrative); it is not linear, and it is not uniform. Itr is a collection, and by nature it is frequently chaotic in its presentation and organization. Among the sacred stories and legal codes are ancient prophecies, songs, oracles, dirges, apocalypses, wisdom teachings, proverbs, and even erotic poetry. It has long been regarded sacred mostly by virtue of its age and its own claim to authority. It was assembled over thousands of years and according to a variety of social, political, doctrinal programmes. Too often, religious people and Christians of a certain ilk have failed to account for the Bible's many foibles, falsehoods, and inconsistentices, and have ascribed to it an authority and a purpose that is entirely misplaced.

[Tron_fdc]

Originally Posted by Flashpoint

What part? The invisible man who lives in the sky? Or the part about Jesus coming back from the dead?

There is no difference between the two. Except that Scientology accepts homosexuals. It wasn't always that way, but in 1976 Hubbart's gay son committed suicide, and so he started to show more tolerance.

Wow. Scientology has the upper hand with regard to tolerance.

Now THAT'S scary.

"Is there a God? If not, what are all these churches for? And who is Jesus’ dad?"

- Michael Scott

[arsenal]

Originally Posted by Hack&Lube

The best thing to read or listen to are L Ron Hubbard's lectures. The guy is the worst speaker in history and it's obvious he's just making it up as he goes along rambling like a deranged person who used to be a science fiction writer.

"I suppose the guy who has trouble running another Thetan at that proximity probably not very horse-powered or something of the sort. Well all I ever did was a body Thetan was just think "go to the .. uh .. uh .. think Incident One zoooom! Go through it, get your stop off you know", "Rmmm", he says "Rmmmm. Zooooom! Hrrm. Hey that's mine!" he'd say. "I'm leaving!" I'd say "Good bye!"

"They were imported. They were actually .. the trick was to shoot somebody, disable somebody, very often a needle into a lung and at the same time to hit him with frozen alcohol and glycol which preparation is guaranteed to pick up a Thetan. All they had to do was pick him up and put him in a refrigerator and they had him, boy. If he tried to exteriorize from the body, there he was, frozen. And they threw 'em into collection points, boxed 'em up in boxes, threw 'em into space planes which were the exact copies of DC8's, the DC8 airplane is the exact copy of the space plane of that day. And, no difference, except the DC8 had fans, propellers on it and the space plane didn't."

"And although I don't think you'd have very much pleasure out of kissing a girl from Jupiter - that's a heavy-gravity planet, and if you stepped on the planet Jupiter in one of these meat bodies that you presently have, you would become a pancake promptly, you see? And what atmosphere it has lies in seas of liquid air and so on. You might say that this is somewhat rigerous as an environment, not completely similar to Russia but.. [laughter]. So you do get these various variations. And it's not all that horrifying however. You find somebody running around the planet Jupiter, he'd be built to withstand that climatic condition, and the gravitic condition and so forth, and his legs might be a bit modified and his arms and that sort of thing, but he would probably look like an Eskimo."

Also - everything the millenia old ancient alien civilizations in faraway galaxys ever possessed look exactly like how earth in the 1950s and 1960s did (they had locomotives, dressed like people in the 50s, all spaceships looked like 1950s DC-8s). It's even better listening to them in audio format:
http://www.rr.cistron.nl/xenu/quotes.htm

None of those make any freaking sense!!! Even if they where in context, they still don't make any sense..

[simmer2]

Originally Posted by Azure

Its your problem if you want to avoid the 'history' behind Christianity. The history behind the Bible...etc, etc.

Textcritic had a great post in another thread...

Read it...

What does anyone's "view" of the Bible matter, when our understanding of what the Bible is is extremely inaccurate?

There are two sides, generally, of this debate: on the one hand is the opinion that the Bible is a meaningless collection of fairytales with no bearing on the present. On the other hand is the conviction that the Bible is a narrative retelling of the universal history, and that it is completely accurate and it is normative for everyone, everywhere, at every time.

Both are patently false.

The Bible is most certainly a broad collection of religious myths, but this is different than ancient fictions or "fairytales". Ancient myths contained within them important interpretations of history, and thus, much of the material from the Bible is important historiographically. The Bible's primary importance, however, is felt religiously and culturally. It is perhaps the single most important "literary work"—and I use this term with some caution—of Western culture. It is the foundation, like it or not, of the legal and moral practice for the vast majority of Western civilizations, and for this reason, it is an important book to know. Also, the Bible is the surviving collection of sacred Scriptures for the largest religion on the face of the earth; the Hebrew Scriptures are foundational for Judaism and were a formative part of the religion of Islam. I do not care what your opinion is of these religions or religions in general, but the very fact that so many people take the Bible seriously makes it meaningful. More often than not, critics of the Christian and Jewish faith have failed to take account of the Bible's special significance.

On the other hand, the Bible is not a narrative work (although it does contain narrative); it is not linear, and it is not uniform. Itr is a collection, and by nature it is frequently chaotic in its presentation and organization. Among the sacred stories and legal codes are ancient prophecies, songs, oracles, dirges, apocalypses, wisdom teachings, proverbs, and even erotic poetry. It has long been regarded sacred mostly by virtue of its age and its own claim to authority. It was assembled over thousands of years and according to a variety of social, political, doctrinal programmes. Too often, religious people and Christians of a certain ilk have failed to account for the Bible's many foibles, falsehoods, and inconsistentices, and have ascribed to it an authority and a purpose that is entirely misplaced.

That was probably one of the best summaries of The Bible I have ever read. Doesn't put blame on one side or the other, just brings up the issues. Thanks for posting that Azure, and to Textcritic.

[Flashpoint]

Originally Posted by Azure

Its your problem if you want to avoid the 'history' behind Christianity. The history behind the Bible...etc, etc.

There is history behind Dianetics, or whatever book Hubbart penned too. Just less of it.

Doesn't make any of it any more "real". At the end of the day, it's a work of fiction - and if people are going to mock Scientology for its clearly insane belief system, then they shouldn't get defensive when told their own religion has no greater claim on reality.

Full marks to Textcritic for his well thought out and eloquent post.