Don't kill yourself

[Sliver]

Originally Posted by jmac98

My understanding on this thread is that it’s directed to everyone and anyone and to be utilized as each individual deems fit for themselves and/or their personal relatable experience.

There is no catch all answer to resolve everyones mental health scenario collectively, but it’s a disservice to discount the shared resources people are posting in here. There are in fact some terrific outlets available, and while they may not be the road to recovery for everyone, they’re the answer for a large population nevertheless.

I think a clichéd statement like 'don't fret the small stuff' as an advice offering to suicidal people has the potential to do a great disservice. It screams 'I don't get it' and puts the onus on the suicidal person to solve their issues themselves in a way the cannot work. It's exactly like telling a person in poverty to pull themselves up by their bootstraps and needs to be called out as such. Lives are literally on the line here. Not all advice is going to be good and some is going to be bad/wrong.

Depressed and suicidal people need professional help, therapy and friends who have taken it upon themselves to have even a basic understanding of depression and suicide. You'd have to go out of your way at this point to think telling a suicidal person not to sweat it is helpful in any way. There isn't an excuse for that extreme lack of awareness of mental health issues to think such a a sentence would be helpful to anyone beyond a toddler who is merely having a bad day.

[jmac98]

Best of luck to you. I hope you find the assistance your situation requires. Thanks for replying all the same, I appreciate the candidness.

[Sliver]

Originally Posted by jmac98

Best of luck to you. I hope you find the assistance your situation requires. Thanks for replying all the same, I appreciate the candidness.

I'm not depressed, suicidal or in need of help, but thanks.

[GirlySports]

Originally Posted by Sliver

I think a clichéd statement like 'don't fret the small stuff' as an advice offering to suicidal people has the potential to do a great disservice. It screams 'I don't get it' and puts the onus on the suicidal person to solve their issues themselves in a way the cannot work. It's exactly like telling a person in poverty to pull themselves up by their bootstraps and needs to be called out as such. Lives are literally on the line here. Not all advice is going to be good and some is going to be bad/wrong.

Depressed and suicidal people need professional help, therapy and friends who have taken it upon themselves to have even a basic understanding of depression and suicide. You'd have to go out of your way at this point to think telling a suicidal person not to sweat it is helpful in any way. There isn't an excuse for that extreme lack of awareness of mental health issues to think such a a sentence would be helpful to anyone beyond a toddler who is merely having a bad day.

That's not what it means at all. My advice is to simply think in the small moments now and not constantly worry about big things far away out of your control.

I've had to learn this myself as I used to worry about benign things far away. I believe that even if you are contemplating suicide, which I have, the only way out of it is to think and do small good things.

[GGG]

Originally Posted by GirlySports

That's not what it means at all. My advice is to simply ithink in the small moments now and not constantly worry about big things far away out of your control.

I've had to learn this myself as I used to worry about benign things far away. I believe that even if you are contemplating suicide, which I have, the only way out of it is to think and do small good things.

In a depressed anxiety ridden mind there is no small stuff. I agree with you that focusing on small victories that you control is helpful

[keenan87]

Nm

[IGGYFORMVP]

This fall my good friends 14 year old committed suicide. There really are no words to describe the hurt and anguish that I have seen them go through. It is going to be a long tough road for them, but as a group of friends we are trying to help them through as much as we can.

I just wanted to give a shout out to all the first responders (paramedics, fireman, police), hospital staff (nurses, doctors), and grief counselors who have been helping them since that day. It is amazing the compassion these people continue to have when they are dealing with this kind of stress every day.

[TSXCman]

Just lost a close friend on Friday due to this.

For all the things going well and to be greatful for, the weight and pain of depression seems to beat it for some.

This is going to be a tough holiday for a huge community.

Look out for each other.

[EVERLAST]

This time of year for folks is tough.
Watched in the last year so many folks just getting over deaths of loved ones at Christmas only to have Christmas roll around again and here we go again.

Mental health is so hard to.predict. that's why it's better to ask than guess if someones okay.

Asking straight up beats guessing and then finding out later things werent good.

[NinePack]

I cant believe how many people that are posters here have first hand experience with suicide.

I personally havent had any friends or family go that way.

Its crazy though to think. I havent had the best time in the last years. Its been a struggle. I have achieved what ive wanted in my life. If you leave financials out of it. At the end of the day i dont see it that way.

Guess what lol im late 30's , lost my best friend charlie (my dog) my partner and i aint great, and i dont like my job.

Having a tuff time piecing together what its all about, kinda lost right now.

Nothing to fall back on , being tied up with stuff you cant get away from.

anyway i dont know what im trying to say

[CaptainCrunch]

I've always thought when people are going through a lot of stuff, and they can see that they're going through a lot of stuff, but they don't know what they're trying to say, its maybe because they can't process what they're going through.



The best thing ninepack, is to find someone to talk to who will listen to you and help you make sense of what you're feeling.

[NinePack]

Originally Posted by CaptainCrunch

I've always thought when people are going through a lot of stuff, and they can see that they're going through a lot of stuff, but they don't know what they're trying to say, its maybe because they can't process what they're going through.



The best thing ninepack, is to find someone to talk to who will listen to you and help you make sense of what you're feeling.

Oh i have a couple of good friends that have my back, talk to them all the time. The thing is they are far from me as i moved far away. Where i live now its a one horse town. I dont feel like expressing my emotions with a small community. Kinda funny that way .

[Inferno]

I've always battled depression but since having to move back home from BC almost 3 years ago I've thought about suicide many times.

The thing that has always snapped me out of it is thinking about what it would do to my family. Especially my mom who has lost her mom and almost all of her siblings to Alzheimer's and is convinced she has it. She's battled mental illness probably since she was 12 when her dad died and if I were to ever do something to myself I think that would push her over the edge and do the same thing.

So instead I just try and be as positive as I can that something will come up and put me back on the path to the life I want.

[Cube Inmate]

Originally Posted by NinePack

I havent had the best time in the last years. Its been a struggle. I have achieved what ive wanted in my life. If you leave financials out of it. At the end of the day i dont see it that way.

Guess what lol im late 30's , lost my best friend charlie (my dog) my partner and i aint great, and i dont like my job.

Having a tuff time piecing together what its all about, kinda lost right now.

Nothing to fall back on , being tied up with stuff you cant get away from.

anyway i dont know what im trying to say

No matter what you're trying to say, just keep saying it. Being alone is the worst thing for one who's losing hope, or who can't see the path forward ("kinda lost"). And it's quite possible to feel alone even surrounded by family and friends, if none of them really get what you're saying.

I think this thread shows that plenty of people are capable of understanding, and go through a lot of similar things. What you described above sounds pretty close to my life as well. I also don't know what is all about, but right now at least I'm cautiously optimistic. I've had depressive episodes in the past though, and the thing I needed most was someone to anchor me long enough that I could stop worrying about where I was drifting and start controlling where I was going. That, and prescription drugs.

I would suggest that anyone commenting on this thread would probably be willing to take PMs from others who need an ear and have no better options. If there's a poster you trust (and you need it), use us.

I'm sorry - I shouldn't speak for others. My point is that it can't hurt to ask, if that's the thing that'll keep someone alive. I'm always to eager to think I can help everyone, and ironically that's one of the things that really weighs on me sometimes!

[flamesfan1297]

This is a great thread, and CP is a great community, there's lots of great people here with lots of knowledge and experience they are willing to share. I posted a thread a couple weeks ago looking for some advice and I couldn't believe the feedback. It's an awesome community with some great people.