What is your go to small chat?

[indes]

I hate small talk, communicating for the sake of communicating is awful in all forms. I couldn't care less about your car trouble, what your kids are doing, how your weekend was. It literally pains me to have to force small talk.

[squiggs96]

[squiggs96]

Happy New Year

[TheScorpion]

"Why do octogenarians disproportionately like the smell of gasoline, anyway?"

[GirlySports]

I always greet people first, "hi, how's it going?" and then they initiate the small talk.

If they stay quiet, I stay quiet.

[Muffins]

Them: How are you?

Me: The details of my life are quite inconsequential

Them: *confused look*

Me: Very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Some times he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy, the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical, summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds, pretty standard really. At the age of 12 I received my first scribe. At the age of 14, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum, it's breathtaking, I suggest you try it.

[MoneyGuy]

Originally Posted by Muffins

Them: How are you?

Me: The details of my life are quite inconsequential

I’m stealing that. I know it’s an icebreaker but I hate that intro to a conversation. I usually don’t really care much how people are and I don’t think they care about that as relates to me.

[Wormius]

^^^ "Allow myself to introduce... myself"

[GirlySports]

but i do care how people are

[LWcrowfoot]

my name is Richie Cunningham, and this is my wife.. Oprah

[Maritime Q-Scout]

I suck at small talk, in the type of person that is more than happy to chat if you initiate but I have trouble initiating myself.

What I find works, at least when on the move (ie: walking to a meeting or you're passing in the hallway)

"Hey how's it going" (bonus if you can use their name)

Then weather is an easy go to.

"Beautiful out, we don't deserve it but I'll take it...

I'd love it to be like this until oh, mid-February or so"

or

God Bless global warming"

If the weather is bad, talk about the rain/snow storms. If you can work in a Frankie prediction, do that.

From there you can usually play off some of the easy breasy humor to another topic, play off the responses.

I can't stress how using people's names increases ease of comfort. It's something I struggle with (my brain doesn't usually hit record until AFTER I'm told your name) but I've been working on.

[DuffMan]

does this smell like chloroform?

[lazypucker]

"How 'bout those Flames?"

[GP_Matt]

I like, What keeps you busy these days? and What do you do for fun?

[8sPOT]

Almost every encounter:

Me: Hey, hows it going?

Them: Good, you?

Me: Pretty good thanks.


End.

[Lubicon]

Originally Posted by troutman

Us introverts avoid small talk at all costs.

Quoted for truth.

[Swarly]

Me: H'are ya now?

Them: Good-n-you?

Me: Not so bad.

[topfiverecords]

I'm creating a thread on CalgaryPuck. Feel free to respond to me in there.

[snootchiebootchies]

Originally Posted by GirlySports

I always greet people first, "hi, how's it going?" and then they initiate the small talk.

If they stay quiet, I stay quiet.

Yes, I've learned to feel more comfortable over the years just staying quiet if the other person is quiet. I'll reluctantly engage if the other person engages.

Also, I don't know why people feel the need to engage in small talk over the phone. I had a couple clients call me at work today who wanted to engage in small talk -- one asked me about the weather, and the other asked me about whether I'm staying busy. Surely on a business call, we can go straight to the reason why you called?

[snootchiebootchies]

Originally Posted by wretched34

"Does this look normal too you?"

Or, "Does this look infected to you?"